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To: wernicke-korsakoff_syndrome@yahoogroups.com
From: sunniibunnii71@...
Date: Wed, 27 Feb 2008 19:47:33 -0800
Subject: Re: [wernicke-korsakoff_syndrome] Please Help asap

I am sorry to hear of your stories, My dad is 60 long long story, he takes vitamins and believe it or not Flintstones vitamins are recommend3d for WKS, he was a mess..I tried in home detox myself and it about killed me,he has been in and out for as long as I can remember, I think its important to understand alanon, that's support for you while dealing and living with an alcoholic, were powerless to the disease, it helps..but never takes that emptiness away. If your mom can no longer care for herself she will need to be in a nursing home, and its sad seeing so many elderly that are in there for wks, or Alzheimer's as they further deteriorate. The only hope is to fully recover from further alcohol, you can get better , to continue heavy drinking can kill you and make you worse, also coming off alcohol without proper detox you can die. I am 35 and I have tried everything in my power to love ,help, fix, my dad and I finally realize its not in my hands, only he can do it and want to do it. and if they don't see there is a problem, and don't want to change they wont and its best to accept there choice, and try and remember them as they once were in your life..my dad was a strong firefighter , ems , dispatcher, very smart, kind , gentle, giving, he turned to alcohol for pain relief to his RAD ( reflex sympathetic dystrophy) and he almost died again this year, he suddenly feels needed by his parents who are in there mid eighty's, so he stopped drinking vodka, now only drinks beer, still not good, but he is slightly back, and he feels needed, and when they pass I know I will loose my dad again. So, its a horrible roller coaster ride of emotions, sadness, anger, grief..Ive felt it all. I have a son who is 6 to raise as a single mom, and he for the 1 st time got to see my dad, his gran dad, sober..on beer only..and he is getting to know him for the 1 st time..he was used to the scary grandpa that fell down etc..so I worry about them getting close now..I don't want this to continue. I went a few years cutting him out of my life, and that didn't fix or change anything. So I learned to accept it, very hard to do. Life is soooo short, I had to choose what I felt was best for me. I live with the good memories of my stong dad I once knew, I hope to talk to you in your situations and we can help each other along the way. Support is what its all about. Your Friend Sunni in Texas

kelli flynt <kelliflynt@yahoo.com> wrote:

I am so sorry to hear of your situation. I'm also
sorry it has taken me so long to respond to your note.
By now you have probly already heard from her doctors
how it won't get any better but it won't get any
worse, unless she continues to drink. It is
inparative that she not drink and continue to take
large doses of vitamins. My husband is one of the
lucky ones that have made it back to somewhat of a
life. He is 31 years old and has unriversible nerve
damage in his legs and short term memory loss. After
he had been in the hospital for 2 months they told us
he would need24 hour a day care either at home or in a
facility. I hope for your sake this is what they not
only told you but her husband as well. Keep your head
up and remember that your mother knows that you love
her. Work with the social workers, they have all
kinds of resources. Keep us up to date on her
condition and on your well being.
Thinking of you,
Kelli
--- shortybiker42 <shortybiker42@yahoo.com> wrote:

> First, thanks in advance if you take the time to
> read my ranting. I
> hope I don't scare anyone away before I can get the
> help I
> desperately need.
>
> My mother has been a chronic alcoholic for as far
> back as I can
> remember. She is now 62 years old and has just been
> hospitalized
> with the classic symptoms of Korsakoff's syndrome.
> I had no idea
> about this syndrome prior to coming home from the
> hospital tonight
> and searching her symptoms - "alcohol, thyroid,
> delusion". When I
> came across this syndrome I knew it was it.
>
> I need to give you a bit of history so that you can
> understand my
> dilemma.
>
> As those of you with an affected loved one can
> imagine, my
> relationship with my mother has been difficult, and
> her having mental
> health issues compounded our issues. At one
> point, years ago, I
> fully removed myself from her life for the sake of
> my own mental
> health. After 4 years of torturing myself with if
> she was even still
> alive I did re-enter her life (in a long distance
> way) to find that
> she had remarried, was medicated and was (I thought)
> being forbade
> liqueur more than once a week. We are now 10 years
> later.
>
> To the point at hand…
>
> I usually talk with my mother a few times a week and
> visit every
> couple of months. The last time I was there was in
> December
> finishing up a dress for her Christmas gift. She
> was ok, for her,
> but weak and told me that she was going to her Dr.
> for tests. She
> complained of not having much of an appetite and not
> being able to
> walk for any huge distances. But while I was there
> she did eat and
> was able to stand for her dress fitting so I
> foolishly assumed that
> she was just getting older and knowing her history
> of abuse I assumed
> that these were probably the normal results for an
> aging alcoholic.
> Both she and her husband assured me that she was
> seeing her Dr.
> regularly and that they were searching for a cause.
>
>
> After that visit I had my usual calls with her but
> the first week of
> January when I called she got on the phone she said
> - "I know what I
> want for Christmas". I thought to myself first -
> she's drunk so hang
> up and I ended the conversation. Then I started to
> wonder about
> early Alzheimer's. I wasn't too worried for her
> safety or anything
> like this, again going on the assumption that she
> was seeing her Dr.
> (completely my fault). The next couple of times I
> called she would
> tell me that she wasn't eating too good and that her
> Dr. had ordered
> an MRI to check out her neck and throat. I hoped
> for the best and
> tried to be patient hoping for a diagnosis and her
> getting better.
>
> This brings us to yesterday.
>
> Her husband called me. A first for everything rite?
> Well, he
> sounded worried and said "she won't eat, maybe you
> can talk to her".
> When he put her on the phone and I heard her little
> weak, mousy voice
> say hello I asked her "are you ok, you have to try
> to eat something"
> her response was "daytime or nighttime".
> My heart fell in my lap. I told her "mom you have
> to eat something"
> and she didn't respond so I asked her to put her
> husband back on the
> phone and she just started saying "yeah, yeah?"
> Finally she put him
> on the phone and I told him to hang up and dial 911
> because there is
> something really wrong with her. They took her to
> the hospital and I
> went down there.
>
> My mother was a rail. She reeked of urine. Her
> skin was like tissue
> paper. Her hands were like ice and she could hardly
> keep her head
> up. She could not hold a conversation being
> completely confused, but
> was too weak to be anything but calm as a cucumber.
> I though she was
> dying.
>
> In the usual admittance procedures I found that not
> only did she not
> have any appetite but that she actually hadn't eaten
> anything of
> significance since Christmas. I thought to myself
> how is it possible
> that she is still even alive without any food. But
> later in that day
> I found out how. She was living off of vodka and
> iced tea
> highballs. Her husband admitted to me and the
> doctors in the ER that
> she has for years been insisting on a drink by her
> bedside for wakeup
> and at least 8 shots a day. I am OUTSIDE myself
> with anger, guilt,
> frustration, fear, you name it.
>
> My dilemma? I have to get my mother help. From
> what I just learned
> about this syndrome, her symptoms, and the fact that
> the first
> courses of treatment for her have been I.V fluids
> with dextrose and a
> B1 shot, leads me to believe this is what we're
> dealing with here.
> She is safe now in the hospital, but if they let her
> go what then? I
> mentioned to her husband even prior to learning
> about the severity of
> her situation that it may be best for them to get
> some home health
> care a couple/few times a week so that she can be
> bathed and fed and
> looked after for her health, but his attitude is
> that he don't want
> anybody in "his" house (not). He has always been a
> bit controlling
> (part of the reason I don't visit more often) and
> throughout the day
> he insisted that he's been caring for her and they
> don't need any
> help. I am really terrified that if she starts
> coming around from
> the B1 (and I hope and pray for that miracle) her
> alcoholism is going
> to take her rite back home to a bottle of vodka.
> And he will be more
> than happy to fix it for her.
>
> I have to get her help.
>
> I learned from talking with the Dr's last night and
> today that PA
> doesn't have any laws prohibitting a person from
> drinking themselves
> to death, and with her husbands rights probably
> coming before mine as
> a child of hers I am so lost.
>
> What should I do next? I do plan on talking with a
> social worker
> tomorrow I hope, but what's the best way to deal
> with this? I just
> want to try to be prepared. I know it's late and
> I'll be leaving for
> the hospital tomorrow morning, so I'm hoping there's
> a few late
> nighter's out there with some advice for me.
>
> Please anybody.
>
>

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