Carol, I can not begin to understand how hard it has been for you to loose your young daughter.  I have received your E-mail, and have read it over and over and have prayed for you often, and still have no words to share. 

My daughter lived.  She has an addition to Chromosome 9, and has been severely developmentally delayed, but like your little angel, she looks "normal" and is full of love.  I believe that those with special needs are a bit closer to heaven than the rest of us.  I will sometimes see Sophie (4 1/2) laughing at what appears to be nothing.  Does she see something that we do not.  Is her angel making her laugh?
I know that Sophie's innocence and pure joy has given me a new perspective on life.  In turn I can share that joy with others.  However, with a special child there also comes pain.  Situations that other parents never have to endure much less think about.  These stuggles have caused me to be more compassionate toward others who are hurting, even though the cause is different, the hurt is just as real.

I know that God has a wonderful plan for each of us.  Why in the world would he allow such pain?  I do not know, but I do know that I do not see things the way God does.  He always uses the week, small and broken to do the big amazing jobs.  (David & Goliath, etc.)  Is there a big job God has in your future?  Someone you can help because of your experience?  I pray that God will show you His perfect plan for your life, and remember that God understands - He lost his son too.

My prayers go with you.

Lois Pettman