Hi!  My name is Betty.  I am the co-facilitator for the SA Subsequent Pregnancy Support Group.  We meet on the 2nd Wednesday of each month at Dunwoody UMC from 7-9pm.  Please see http://www.shareatlanta.org/subpgmenu.htm for more info.

I hope that by sharing my story someone may find the comfort and peace that they are seeking.  My first son, Brian Kevin Miller, Jr was born 16 weeks too early on July 21, 2003 due to an Incompetent Cervix.  He weighed in at 1 lb 7 ozs and 12 1/4 " long, no bigger than a beanie baby.  He lived two weeks in the NICU.  We lost him two days before our 9th wedding anniversary.  I had spent 31 days in the hospital experiencing an emergency cerclage, excrutiating bedrest (head lower than feet!), and finally a C-section only to go home with empty arms.  Then the funeral and our anniversary came and went, the due date, Thanksgiving, Christmas...all the "firsts" without our son. 

Eight months later, I found out I was pg again!  My OB had a plan this time and did a cerclage at 13 weeks.  I am a RN so she took me out of work at 18 weeks for modified bedrest at home.  During one of MANY u/s it was discovered that my cervix had shortened and I was having small contractions.  I was sent straight to the hospital at 25 weeks for strict bedrest and I cried the whole trip feeling as though I was being sent to prison.  We lived there for seven weeks and my DH spent every night (except one) sleeping on one of those very uncomfortable reclining chairs.  I was only allowed to get out of bed to potty and then to shower every other day.  The perinatologist finally sent me home at 32 weeks, more for my sanity than anything!

Joseph Brian Miller was born at 37 weeks on November 23, 2004!  Two days before Thanksgiving so we had LOTS to be thankful for, even turkey and dressing in the hospital!  Joey had RDS from being born early via C-section and had to spend one week in the NICU.  But you could never tell it now...he is a happy, healthy and active 2 1/2 year old   

I can now say that I have survived.  I can also say that I think about Baby Brian every day and wonder what he would be doing right now.  I also think about the fact that if it were not for him we would not have Joey today.  The pain and heartbreak of losing a baby is still there, but it is not as raw as it was in the beginning.  Baby Brian is forever in my heart...holding the pieces together.

Thanks for reading,

Betty