Thank you for taking the time to respond and offer that great advice.  I have
been considering talking with a colleague, or even going through some therapy
myself, to cope with this issue from a personal perspective.  You are very right
about my training either helping or hurting me, so to speak.  It's frequently a
difficult position for me.  Thanks again!




________________________________
From: simonshek_2000 <simonshek_2000@...>
To: positivepartnersofsurvivors@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Thursday, September 3, 2009 5:06:25 PM
Subject: [POS Re: struggling

 
The training you have as a social worker will either work tremendously for you,
by knowing to keep a professional distance, or against you, because you have
some inclination how to help her, yet also remain involved on a personal level.
Because of this, your situation is a bit different from many of the posts here.
Believe it or not, you may consider getting some advice on the side from a
collegue for your own well being to better understand the best approach to this.
Ultimately, you also know that healing and the survivor's choice and time to
heal is her journey. Who she takes along for the ride and who can handle it has
been documented by many of us here.

--- In positivepartnersofs urvivors@ yahoogroups. com, "pattersonamy67"
<pattersonamy67@ ...> wrote:
>
> I've been with my partner 14 months. She has been in therapy since November
08. She is currently undergoing EMDR for the sexual abuse trauma and its helping
but its also bringing up so many emotions for her. I beleive she also struggles
with Borderline Personality Disorder. Although I'm a licensed clinical social
worker and "understand" these things professionally, it is completely different
to be a part of it on a personal level. She is having terrible nightmares and is
talking in her sleep, like a re-inactment, of things that happened to her,
begging her abuser to stop. I just laid next to her in bed crying the other
night as I listened to her inner-4-year- old beg and plead. It was terrible!
She's so afraid I will leave her and sometimes is so needy that its almost
suffocating to me. I love her with all my heart though and so intensely hope we
can survive this. I don't want to leave her. She's an amazing woman. She told me
she was sexually abused on
our first date. It didn't freak me out because I had dealt with it
professionally many times. But as I said, its different when its the person with
whom you're in love. Any support, advice or guidance would be so appreciated.
Thanks
>







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