J.,
Yes, for sure.
People grow and change.
One of the problems is that everyone takes their own experience,
subjective as that is, and assumes it applies to everyone. But we're
all different.
If you've been together for eight years, something must be working,
and something must be worth waiting for. You must love her.
This is not something to be taken lightly. Many people wait their
whole lives to really love someone.
We've all felt lonely. People in relationships that are "working"
often feel lonely.
My sense is that this woman is worth it -- or else you wouldn't have
bothered to seek out this site, to try to figure her out.
And she sounds worth figuring out.
Look into yourself. You're not "co-dependent" as much as a guy trying
to love a woman.
Keep us posted,

Daniel



--- In positivepartnersofsurvivors@yahoogroups.com, "lcals67"
<lcals67@...> wrote:
>
> Hi,
>
> I'm new to the group but fairly old to my relationship :)
>
> I've been with my partner for going on 8 years now and our
> relationship has suffered for 6 ½ of those years. With the
skilled
> help from a therapist over the last 3 years, she is in a position
to
> move forward with her healing which makes me very happy for her and
I
> hope that she can heal what happened to her as a child.
>
> I'm here because I am struggling in several areas and I'm hoping
that
> in "talking" with people who have been or who are in a similar
> situation can offer me advice or just someone to talk to in this
> seemingly lonely place.
>
> My own background is a co-dependent and I understand that it's not
> only her that has to change, I have to do it as well and I'm doing
my
> best to not take responsibility for someone else's problems, (not
> only with my partner but with other people around me) but I have my
> days.
>
> Are there any positive stories here? Where someone has actually
> stayed and things improved?
>
> I appreciate your replies, any and all.
>
> :)
> J
>