Hi E.There are flare-ups on this board from time to time, and it does
affect us all when two members argue in public, as I found when I
became involved in a disagreement.I think the best thing for us all
is to take Shelly's advice, to ignore anyone whose post or style of
writing offends.That being said, there are lots on this board who do
want to listen and offer help/solace.Any more more details so we can
share?

Bill











In positivepartnersofsurvivors@yahoogroups.com, E <agprez2005@...>
wrote:
>
> Someone told me that they were irreversibly falling in love with me
today.
> I went home and sat broken, staring at a piece of paper, test
results, that have just crushed me. I hate that piece of paper. I
hate my life.
>
> So I came to the people that have held my hand through the
roughest moments of my life so far. But all that was there was even
more hatred.
>
> I am posting this as an ode to the lost idea of this group. We
come here for healing, for hope, and we trust eachother. We trust
eachother because we are united. This is a respectful place and a
place where we can share about the impact of loving someone who
survived just as we have survived. We are hurt; we dragged ourselves
here to find solace and we end up finding more hatred?
>
> I can not believe that someone would throw around conversations
that were had on this board or in private in order to "PROVE"
something about someone else. You could likely tell me that I am a
woman who encouraged her survivor to overstate his issues by f*ing
random people in the a*hole by what I have posted on this board.
Thats what he did, so by default I am to blame because I may
psychologically have another issue that would have encouraged him to
be a homosexual and I am thus, an evil person. The words we post here
are just pieces. We can not explain ourselves fully through a screen.
These are words, reflections of ourselves. Who could define
themselves by words alone? I know I can not, and I don't think anyone
else could either.
>
> So I came to this place and I now feel even worse. I feel scared
to say what I wanted to say, to share about myself or to discuss
things with others.
>
> Why is this hatred there? Why is there always need for
vilification?
>
> I have a man who loves me, a fabulous job, a brilliant mind and a
small piece of paper that tells me I will be a PARTNER of a SURVIVOR
for the rest of my life. And I wanted to find some love in that,
somewhere in that, maybe from the people who have held my hand
through the rest.
>
> Some things are irreversible, inexplicable, overwhelming and
beyond ourselves. We have to reach out beyond ourselves and give love.
>
> You guys are hurting and the hating makes it feel better.
>
> But we are here to encourage ourselves past these points.
>
> I don't feel loved and I don't think anyone else does either.
Love is the great gift and the most honest part of peace in your
heart. And I think it is at the heart of this group, or I may be
mistaken.
>
> So I will go share a piece of my broken heart and try to see if
someone who is irreversibly falling for me can still love me through
the huge SCARS of a relationship with a SURVIVOR, someone who really
hurt me, because someone really hurt him, because he was hurt too by
someone who hated someone who hurt someone who hated someone else.
>
> I hate the way I feel too, but I try not to let it allow me to
hurt and attack other people.
>
> Simon-
>
> I am sorry that you feel attacked by the fact that your wife
posted a well-focused public attack on her relationship with you, the
main person who has loved her as a positive partner of a survivor. I
think her posting was directly aimed at you, as she spoke to us as a
group refering to her interaction with her PARTNER, you. I know you
are hurting and I am sorry that she continues to rub your face in the
dirt.
>
> E
>
>
>
>
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