Thank you for your input Jen, I will definatly take your advice. I
really appreciate it, I can't believe I didn't figure it out before,
I seem to be drawn to this type of man, and have had several
relationships that were very similar. But at least I know now what I
am dealing with, and can get out long before I get hurt again.

Kacy

--- In passiveaggressivesupport@yahoogroups.com, Jennifer Leigh
<editorjenniferleigh@...> wrote:
>
>
> The only way to help him is to set boundaries and see what happens.
Tell him you're bringing either a mutual friend or a cop to come get
your stuff.
> NEVER CALL HIM AGAIN. Sorry, but this is a cycle.
> Next time he cries and tells you he's sorry, tell him you will stay
with him if and when he gets therapy.
> Good luck!
> Jen
>
> To: passiveaggressivesupport@yahoogroups.com
> From: prncsskc@...
> Date: Wed, 8 Oct 2008 19:42:19 +0000
> Subject: [Passive Aggressive Support] Seeking some assistance...
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> I've been with my Boyfriend for 10 months now, and
following our last
>
> big fight 3 weeks ago, I started looking for some clues as to what
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> was going on. So I stumbled across an article on P/A and it seems
to
>
> fit, only on a much smaller scale. We haven't spoken in 3 weeks,
and
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> it's not for lack of my trying. He's done the 'I need time/space'
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> thing a couple of times in the past but never to this extent, and
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> usually ends up calling me crying about how he can't live without
me,
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> and how sorry he is for putting me through it. I've told him in
the
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> past how much I dislike it when he closes me out, and he always
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> promises to 'try not to do it', but then he does it again. The
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> reason for our fight is a long story, and we we're both at fault,
at
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> least where I see it, but he is blaming me for all of it, because I
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> was pushing him to feel something for me that he couldn't/didn't.
He
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> is emotionally cold to me, but only when I get emotional with him.
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> Any other time he is very affectionate, and loving. He's gone into
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> hermit mode, and is avoiding all of our friends and hiding
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> basically. At this point, I have cut off all contact with him,
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> because he doesn't return my calls anyway. I asked him if I could
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> come get my things, and he won't let me. He still says we are
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> together, even though he's not speaking to me, but I'm the one
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> feeling guilty about it, even though it's not entirely my fault.
Is
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> this normal P/A behavior, and if so what can I do to help him?
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>
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> Thanks
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> Kacy
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