I joined this group months ago when I realized my bf of 7 years is
PA. We've been doing ok till the last couple months. We bought a
house together in Sept and I was hoping it was a step in the right
direction. Now I realize it was just wishful thinking.

The situation has always been the same, he does what he wants, yells
at me when I confront him with it. How he can't just do what he
wants and not tell me. He has two responsiblities at home
(children). I deserve more respect. He has always been like that,
feels he doesn't have to answer to me.

The major problem started beginning of Dec. He works nights 6pm-6am
sometimes and one particular Sat night he ended up leaving at
midnight and went out to the bar. He was a bit late from coming home
the next morning (30 min or so), I was worried cause it had snowed
and he hadn't gotten any sleep the day before. He tends to nod off
while driving home sometimes. I called him on his cell to check on
him. He said he was on his way..was walking home cause his truck ran
out of gas. He walked in door and I sat with him on couch, covered
him with a blanket to warm up. I cuddled up to him to help warm him
up and he smelled like a bar. I asked him...he said a couple guys
from work were smoking while waiting to punch out. WHAT??!! Like I
was that stupid for him to lie directly to my face. I knew he was
out at the bar. I couldn't believe he lied like that, he's lied
before but not so much that I outright knew it..and he did also. I
argued a bit about it, he finally said he was out with his friend
and they went to some lame after bar party then had to drive his
friend home. How convenient that he got home exactly at the time he
usually does from work.

Well, I put my foot down on this one, I expected an apology for the
outright lie. He said he was sorry nonchalantly and left it at that.
I wasn't satisfied..even though I knew it isn't something he
normally does.

For about a week or so I kind of let him know I wasn't
happy...giving him the same cold shoulder he does when he gets in
trouble and tries to ignore it till it goes away. We got in a huge
fight and I said I was going to be moving out in the spring. This
was about a week before xmas. I had taken a day off work so we could
go shopping. He all of a sudden turned his attitude around and was
trying to be happy.

Well then...somehow my email was open and he found some nude pics a
guy sent me. Now...I did not ask for these pics. and I thought I had
deleted them from my email. He went off on me..called me the C word.
And since then he's been acting again like I'm at fault. I
apoligized to him, told him the truth about the pics and I still
can't get through to him. He's been avoiding me, acting like the
usual "nothing is wrong' But we've not been affectionate. He talks
casually to me, but that is it.

I'm at the end where I know I should break it off. I can't take his
behavior anymore, but I also want to try to work it out. Maybe it's
my codependency.

Sorry so long, just need to vent about his behavior and I am happy
to know that I am not the only one who goes through this

Christine