Hello JS,

When I was looking for info regarding PA personalities, I happend upon
this group. Before I posted I started with mssg #1 and read through
452 mssgs to get the feel and tone of the group, I don't know if any
of the mssgs were yours. That being said, I can totally understand how
Jen's situation falls into the boundries of the group intent. TOO SUPPORT!

My PA hb has a long history of heart/weight problems on his side of
the family. HB is on many meds to control there conditions. BUT he is
also very overweight, and when I try to talk with him about his health
issues, his mouth opens in flows a steady stream of JUNK FOOD, CANDY,
ANYTHING TO P*SS ME OFF! This is PA behavior that hurts not only him
but me too.

Just mu 2 cents in the pot...




--- In passiveaggressivesupport@yahoogroups.com, JS <jamst@...> wrote:
>
> Maybe this is not a passive aggressive issue. Maybe this is about her
> addiction problem to nicotine.
> Why is addiction to a chemical substance considered passive aggressive
> behaviour. Are you saying that
> people who smoke and who are grossly obese are passive aggressive?
You can't
> be serious!
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Jennifer Mustoe" <authoreditor_jenniferleigh@...>
> To: <passiveaggressivesupport@yahoogroups.com>
> Sent: Wednesday, October 04, 2006 8:19 AM
> Subject: Re: [Passive Aggressive Support] surrounded by denial and
excuses
>
>
> > Let's see-- it's about me because I don't want to lose my mother,
my son's
> > grandmother. It's about my grief. I appreciate your info about
her other
> > health conditions. If you're on this list, you are here for
support about
> > addictions/behaviors concerning passive aggression. I came
because I'm
> > hurting over my mother's addiction, that is killing her. Is that
so hard
> > to understand? Passive aggression is a 'choice' in that it is
behaviors
> > that are ingrained, but still chosen. Though smoking is
addictive, it's
> > still a choice, and every cigarette she smokes takes her that much
closer
> > to death. And the lungs are remarkably capable of regeneration,
so if she
> > quit now, she'd have a longer, healthier life. And I'm frustrated
she
> > isn't choosing that. That in and of itself seems pretty passive
> > aggressive, if you look at it a certain way.
> > Jen
> >
> > JS <jamst@...> wrote:
> > Anurisms are not caused by smoking. It is a genetic
defect in the
> > elasticity
> > of an artery. Smoking is very addictive and it is extremely
difficult to
> > quit. Perhaps
> > *she *should consult her physician about some of the very useful and
> > successful "quit-smoking" products available. She will quit when
*she* is
> > ready and when *she* decides to take the steps. And if she doesn't
that is
> > *her* choice isn't it? Why are you making this about you?
> >
> > This turn of events (surgery) is necessary to repair her artery. Yes
> > quitting smoking would help, but it might not happen so be
prepared to
> > live
> > and respect her decision.
> >
> > J
> >
> > ----- Original Message -----
> > From: "Jennifer Mustoe" <authoreditor_jenniferleigh@...>
> > To: "Jen Leigh" <authoreditor_jenniferleigh@...>
> > Sent: Tuesday, October 03, 2006 11:57 PM
> > Subject: [Passive Aggressive Support] surrounded by denial and excuses
> >
> >> My mother, who turned 77 on Sept 30, was told that she needs to go on
> >> medication for high blood pressure and high cholesterol, and then
was
> >> told
> >> she needs to get an operation to help with her anurism (sp) which
is near
> >> her heart. My mother is horrified, saying she can't believe she
has to
> >> have meds and now an operation! She's always been so healthy!
> >> Need I say, she's been smoking 2 pks a day since she was 12? She is
> >> grossly overweight?
> >> And my brother, who hasn't worked an honest day's work in his
life lives
> >> with her, debilitated with his hepatitis he got as a heroin user.
He was
> >> denied social security and my mother is upset about this too
(which of
> >> course means she smokes even more.)
> >> I am angry. Did she really think she could smoke like a chimney
and it
> >> would never catch up with her? She is wanting to move up here to live
> >> near me, and 'then' plans on quitting smoking. Does she think
it'll be
> >> easier up here?
> >> I want to write her a letter, because I can't seem to come up
with the
> >> words over the phone (we talk several times a day) YOU ARE KILLING
> >> YOURSELF. WHEN DO YOU SUPPOSE IT'D BE A GOOD TIME TO QUIT?
> >> We are praying she'll quit, I plan on calling my brother and
telling him
> >> it's about time he do something for her for a change and stop
smoking, or
> >> she'll never quit.
> >> My mother will die someday, we all will. But it seems remarkable that
> >> she is sooooo upset about this turn of events, when she knows how bad
> >> smoking is.
> >> Oh, I'm just upset.
> >> Any advice?
> >> I do plan on calling her doctor and asking her point blank: what
have you
> >> told my mother about smoking? For what my mother pays for in
cigarettes,
> >> she could get enough bliss out drugs to keep the cravings at bay for
> >> months, with the patch, gum, and a load of Xanax!
> >> Jen
> >>
> >>
> >> http://authorjenniferleigh.tripod.com
> >> http://editing-for-you.tripod.com
> >> http://cjfoundationqh.tripod.com
> >> http://jenniferleacmustoe.tripod.com
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> ---------------------------------
> >> Want to be your own boss? Learn how on Yahoo! Small Business.
> >>
> >> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Yahoo! Groups Links
> >>
> >>
> >>
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> >>
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> >>
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> >>
> >>
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > http://authorjenniferleigh.tripod.com
> > http://editing-for-you.tripod.com
> > http://cjfoundationqh.tripod.com
> > http://jenniferleacmustoe.tripod.com
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
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> > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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