Hi,

Im a 19 year old from Australia and realised I had OCD only a year
ago. In the past I always knew I was a bit different as I remember
when I was 8 years old I had a horrible compulsion of wanting
to 'touch' a certain object like a chair over and over again.

However it wasnt until I was sitting for my final exam (the Higher
School Certificate) that my OCD suddenly became really bad and I
started searching for help, which is when I self diagnosed myself
with OCD.

In my situation my OCD seems to get worse during stressful periods
eg the exams. I tend to 'overthink' nearly everything and once I
start giving into my thoughts it just gets worse and worse.
Compulsions ranged from absolutely anything but last year focused
greatly on the fear of going bad in my exams. It would take me an
hour to learn something that should have taken 15 mins due to me
overthinking the content of what I had to learn, and when I got back
an assessment Id over dwell on how it would affect my final mark'

Unfortunately I didnt realise back then how to control my OCD. Id
say 'this is the last time im going to give into my thoughts and ill
never do it again' However, this of course doesnt work and just re
does the whole cycle.

Well the HSC is now over and I got a decent mark, however not one I
knew I COULD have got if I knew how to control my OCD.

However Im very happy now to say that I have been in way better
control than ever before thanks to lots of reading both on this site
and other sites. Ive now learnt that not giving in and just
accepting that terrible compulsive feeling really does work.

No one knows that I have OCD (not my parents, friends etc) except
myself and now you! I dont think Ill ever tell my close family.

At the moment however I still sometimes get upset by how I could
have gone better in my final mark and this is heightened by the
expectations but on my parents - they also knew I could have gone
better but unfortunately dont know why I didnt go better - which
makes me look stupider than I really am.

Anyway I wont make this too long. In summary I just want to wish all
those suffering from this horrible illness all the best. I feel for
all of you as I know exacly what your all going through and I also
know you can improve and get through it, as I have done. (Well I
wont say ive beaten it but Ive definetly improved :)

Jamie