I am a sub acute social worker in a nursing facility. I understand
that this group is a support group for CNA's, but I need your
assistance in writing a book which contains experiences of staff,
residants and their families. I have attatched the preface from my
book.... hope you can help. You make a huge difference in these
peoples lives and this would be another way to reach out to others.
Thank you for your help


Namaste,

Kimberly

Through Love and Laughter
By
Kimberly Ann Henry


Preface


As a social worker in a long term care I have had the unique
opportunity to see all the frustrations, sadness, fears, feelings of
helplessness, loving times, happy times, humorous times, moments of
triumphs and successes that staff, residents and their families go
through. Staff were feeling overwhelmed, unappreciated, overworked
and underpaid. Family members were feeling overwhelmed,
unappreciated, overworked, guilty and confused. Residents were
feeling confused, misunderstood, abandoned, unloved, afraid of the
unknown and the vulnerability that goes with having to rely on others
to meet their needs. All of these people sharing similar feelings
and still feeling as if no one understands what they are going
through which creates the feeling as if they have no support system
to help them through their emotions and frustrations. Add all of
these emotions together, put all the people affected by the situation
in one building and helplessness starts to appear. It grows and
devours energy until everyone gives up on the idea that it could be
any different, that they can make a difference in others' lives or
that change is even possible.

When I started working in long term care years ago as the only
social worker in a 120 bed facility, I felt that if I could make a
difference in just one person's life then it was worth it.
Eventually, along with my co-workers, my residents and their
families, helplessness took me over and all I could see were the
people I was not able to help because I was only one person. I began
to realize how restrained I was by my employer and the lack of
resources available for me to help others to the extent they needed,
or make any lasting change to better the situation for everyone.

I have had people come up to me and say "How can you work in a
place like that? Isn't it depressing?" Even with everything I just
said – my answer to this question has not changed. There are some
amazing things that happen in nursing homes.…fun times, funny stories
and touching moments that will make you laugh and make you cry. As I
have come to discover, not all facilities are the same. The
personality of the building will take on the personality of the
people who work and live in them. Just imagine how different you
would feel if you walked into a building that had staff, residents
and family members who felt needed, appreciated, valued, loved, taken
care of, who trusted each other and treated each other as family. I
have had the pleasure of being in facilities where you feel this
positive energy when you first walk in the door. I would like to
find what makes such things happen, build on it and share it with
others so everyone who works or lives in a facility can have a
positive, loving, growing experience.

I look back at all those happy, funny, touching moments and
realize how precious they really are. I want to put them in some
rich soil, water it, nurture it and watch it grow…watch it become
contagious and take on a life of its own to where it gets so out of
control that there is no room for that evil word HELPLESSNESS!

Let us share each others' perspectives on these experiences by
telling our stories. Let us put our stories, our hearts and hands
together to support each other. Through love and laughter we CAN
create a work environment that we can be proud of. Through love and
laughter we CAN create a home environment in which we can all grow
and nurture one another. Together we CAN make a difference.



I see this collection of stories as an opportunity to accomplish 3
things:

First, I see telling our stories to each other as a way we can
promote understanding by giving us the opportunity to communicate in
a positive way. I would like people to see what I see: although we
experience the situation differently, the feelings are not all that
different. Through understanding the others' perspective we can come
to realize that we are not alone, we are in this together and if we
support each other we can create the environment we desire.

Second, I see telling our stories to others as a way of breaking
stereotypes of seniors, adult care facilities and nursing homes.
What we believe about something will affect how we act. If someone
believes "old people" are like children with nothing to contribute to
society they will treat them as such. If a person sees nursing homes
as a place to die, they will. There is so much negative publicity
about nursing homes these days it is no wonder people fear them, hate
the people who work in them, and say they would rather die before
going into one. Think negative, the nursing home will be filled with
nothing but negativity and we will create a self fulfilling prophecy
affect. People believe what they see on television. Let's tell the
story accurately and whatever belief the reader holds as inaccurate
has a better chance of being revised.

Third, I see telling our stories to others as an opportunity to
empower people through educating them on how the "system" works.
Perhaps learning this information when they are not in the middle of
it is just what they need to minimize the distress they will feel
when it becomes real for them. When someone is new to the facility
too often residents and their families come to me in distress
although they had the assistance of people within the community prior
to moving in. They have so many questions. I have learned that they
either didn't know to ask the question so it was not offered by
anyone they encountered; or they asked the wrong person therefore,
got the wrong answer; or they were just too overwhelmed to be able to
understand everything that was being told to them at the time.
Having to assist a loved one or moving into a facility of any kind is
stressful enough without the added stress of someone not giving them
all the information they needed when they needed it the most.

Are you a staff person in a health care facility or know someone
who is? Are you a son or daughter who has been in a position to be a
parent to your parent or know someone who has? Are you a senior who
has had to give up your home to move because you no longer are able
to care for yourself or do you know someone who has? Everyone we
know has, is, or will be touched with these issues at some time in
their life. In some cases, some of us will go through all three of
these stages.

Getting old will never go away. ALL of us will need someone to
care for us when we are no longer able to care for ourselves.
Assisted living and nursing facilities are not going to go away. How
will you want to live the rest of your life?

Let us share each others' perspectives on these experiences by
telling our stories. Let us put our stories, our hearts and hands
together to support each other. Through love and laughter we CAN
create a work environment that we can be proud of. Through love and
laughter we CAN create a home environment in which we can all grow
and nurture one another. Together we CAN make a difference.

For this ambitious vision to flourish, I need your stories.
Stories from staff, residents and family members who either work,
live in or have a family member who is in a nursing facility.
Moments that have touched your heart, made you smile, made you laugh,
made you cry. If you feel sharing these moments could make a
difference in someone else's life by sharing it, please submit your
stories to:

Kimberly Henry
PO Box 5
East Amherst, NY 14051
enspiritedchoices@...