Oprah's Not-so Vegan Diet

One month ago (on or about June 10, 2008), Oprah
announced that she would be going on a vegan diet...
just as an experiment. Her fat magically melted away.

This week (July 5, 2008), she's performing a new
experiment.

Oprah's left behind the word "vegan" in America
and is now meat-eating her way through Italy. On
Sunday, she ate a mozzarella the size of the Leaning
Tower of Pisa. On Monday, she ate a provolone in
the shape of the Sistine Chapel. Rumor has it that
she intends to visit the sinking city of Venice.
Superstitious Venetians are urging Oprah to return
to her vegan ways or immediately return to America.
Do not pass Go-gonzola. Do not collect 200 lira.

Italians say that "what happens in Roma, stays in
Roma." Photos of Oprah appear to contradict that
adage. It appears that what happen in Roma, stays
on Oprah's thighs, stomach, and tush.

Very effective experiment, Oprah!

And now for a bit of FOOD FOR THOUGHT.

On page 53, there is some sage advice for Oprah:

"Carefully consider your diet. Study from cause to effect.
Cultivate self control. Keep appetite under control of
reason. Never abuse the stomach by overeating, but do not
deprive yourself of the wholesome, palatable food that
health demands."
- Ellen G. White

"A man's palate can, in time, become accustomed to anything."
- Napoleon Bonaparte

Oprah: You've visited two worlds. The world of Italy and
the world of Vega. Please pay close attention to your body's
clues and recognize that Italy is a nice place to visit but
you wouldn't want to live there, Instead, make your
permanent home a vegan one.

Robert Cohen
http://www.notmilk.com