When you visit your doctor, it's a successful if on leaving you know
what's wrong and what the doctor can do to make you better. The
meeting is less satisfying but still successful if upon leaving you
don't know what's wrong but the doctor has told you, in words you can
understand, why he (or she) doesn't know what's wrong, but can tell
you what to do to find out.

The visit's a failure if on leaving you don't know what's wrong, the
doctor can't tell you what's wrong, and he can't tell you how to find
out. The meeting's a failure if on leaving you're more anxious,
depressed, and confused then before. To minimize such failures, ever
more common is an age of shorter visits, harried doctors, and more
complicated problems, there are things you can do. Start by asking
yourself why you're seeing the doctor. If you can't say "why" in a
few words, he might not be able to help. He's a doctor, not a mind
reader.

When you visit your doctor you're probably anxious or depressed
thinking: "What's wrong? Is it bad? Will the doctor know? Can he
help?"

You may be angry (whether you realize it or not), thinking: "Why me?
Why do I have to be sick? Why do I have to see this doctor? And why
do I have to pay for the privilege?"

Don't let your anger get the best of you. Thus, if after being
diagnosed, you don't agree with or like the diagnosis, don't "shoot
the messenger:" He may be wrong and deserve being shot, but he may be
right! And, sometime soon, you may need him. Remember, you not he has
the problem, and you not he needs help.


Abraham Lieberman MD, Medical Director