----- Original Message -----

From: Nora Mae

To: neurofibromatosis2@yahoogroups.com

Sent: Friday, June 11, 2004 2:25 PM

Subject: Re: [Neurofibromatosis] Digest Number 345

I'm sorry to be so blunt, but your mother's outlook is very damaging and much of your sister's low self-esteeem can be blamed on your mother.    You really need your sister to talk to other people with NF who feel good about themselves and are positive about life.   Your mother's bitterness has hurt you because she was angry at you for having it, but it hurt your sister because if your mother saw herself as a freak, then your sister would only assume that that's how her mother (and everyone else) saw her.  I'm so sorry you had to grow up with a mother who treated you like that.   I pray every day that my kids will NOT get it; that they will not have go thru this.  Not becasue I'd love them less or because I would see them any differently -- but because it is painful (emotionally), and it is difficult.   But what makes a person beautiful is what is on the inside.   You have that inner beauty, and that is what is going to make a relationship last -- not how long one stays beautiful.  Besides... a relationship based soley on physical attraction is very shallow.  I hope your sister can heal, and in time, I hope she will begin to love herself and enjoy life.   I'd be willing to communicate with her if she would like.   # Take care, Nora

neurofibromatosis2@yahoogroups.com wrote:

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There are 2 messages in this issue.

Topics in this digest:

1. sister
From: "cheryalh"
2. Re: sister
From: carolinacpnter@...


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Message: 1
Date: Tue, 08 Jun 2004 18:40:09 -0000
From: "cheryalh"
Subject: sister

I have a younger sister that has NF, actually three younger sisters.
Our mother also has NF. I never did develope NF and neither has my
daughter. Our mother had a pour outlook regarding the NF, people
stared and she was very self concious. The reason I am writing, my
sister is going thru some emotionally rough times right now, her self
esteem is so low that she found herself looking very closly at her
profile and now regards herself as a monster. To be very honest, I
can not relate to what she feels like and I don't know what to tell
her. If I can get her to agree to it, do you all think that maybe
you guys can help her thru this. She does have an email address, but
I want to get her permission first before I send it out. She also
has other issues that all seem to tie into having NF. Our mother
never dealt with it very well, so I'm sure that has alot to do with
it. Our mother also had other mental problems, I remember her
getting so mad at me because I did not have NF, she would tell me
that when I turned 21 I would wake up one morning with all these
bumps all over and if I was married my husband would leave me and my
children would leave as well. Needless to say, the relationship with
the family is not a very good one. I do care very much for my
sister, but I also know that she will not do the searching for help.
Please let me know what you think.



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Message: 2
Date: Tue, 8 Jun 2004 18:58:44 EDT
From: carolinacpnter@...
Subject: Re: sister

tell her to e mail me i wont look down on her i have bumps to
feel same as she does


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