Mike,

You are playing offence to try to win. I'm trying to win also. I'm
just not so sure we're playing the same game. You are seeing me as
an opponent. I'm seeing you as a teammate. A better understanding of
the world is my goal. What is yours?

> It's interesting how you imply that an "us against them"
perspective is
> wrong and unrealistic.
>

The "us against them" perspective is not unrealistic. It really does
happen and underlies a lot of male/female interactions but not all.
I would just say it is not the most objective perspective. As far as
it being wrong, by what standard? If the standard is objectivity and
healthy coexistence, then yes, the men against women perspective is
wrong. I'm more interested in striving for potential than acceptance
of the status quo.


> I'm sorry, but no, I don't think you did slip into my mind-stream.
You're
> not dealing at all with what I'm talking about, because your wife
is not an
> amoral, self-loathing, self-serving, blindly-reproducing,
> Jerry-Springer-guest mother, like the majority of American single
mothers.

You are right. I realized this angle after I wrote my previous post.
I even mentioned it to my wife and used the popularity of Jerry
Springer as the basis of my perspective. It's kinda scary that I was
able to produce the same symbolism as you. I don't want to get
inside your head that much.


> > was lost in thought. I was thinking how fundamentally female
> > it is to get what they want through the action of others.
>
> That's an amazing insight. I've never thought about it that way
before.

Nor had I. There is value in sinking into different perspectives. I
just don't want to stay there for long. I don't enjoy being caught
in an inter-subjective game of tug-of-war. The great thing is, once
you have identified the nature of the game, you are less likely to
be controlled by it.


> actually you each recognized your filters. You didn't discard
them.

Right. We brought the filters to conscious awareness which allowed
us to choose not to continue with that perspective.


Next
> week, she'll be back silently bitching at you while you silently
cringe.

Possibly, but it doesn't happen very often. When it does, we usually
recognize it very quickly. Under normal conditions we are very non-
stereotypical. Tiredness and outside stresses suppress the Ego and
release the Id.


Men should shut the eff up because they don't want to
> sound like shrill feminists.
>
> I'm fine with being called a bitch.

And I'm sure you will always be a bitch Mike. I don't really want to
change that. I have said I get a lot from your perspective.


>
> Define scumbag mother for me.

Point taken.

Paul