Hi Phyllis in Canada, the internet has certainly shrunk the world. What
happened to me was I was a very religious person. Then I joined a 12 step group
and found another dimension to enter. This was devoid of rules and based on
seeking direct guidance and knowledge of God's will for me. This transition
took quite a few years. For the most part I am ok, but occasionally and for
varied reason, the critical damming voice in my head finds something to condemn
or harass me on.

This time it is not being married. The voice is quick and very clever and
subtle and will use the old testament version of God.
(one that my mother used to control me when I was a child)
to put terror into my heart.

The last time it happened really bad, was when I was looking into doing
mediation with the Buddhist monks.

The religion I once belonged to believed that eastern religions were opposed to
God. So in my heart I knew this was not true but the head still came in and
attacked me. The panic attacks were so severe I had to leave the room. It took
some days before I could do a track down on what happened. And even though in my
heart I do not believe in hell, my head believes differently.

So it has been great to read what others are having to say. Also when I was in
the religion I was taught that sitting and meditating would open me up to you
know who. I don't even like to give it a name. But my journey from religion to
spirituality has been difficult. I am glad I can talk about this openly here.
thanks Phyllis, bye for now Beverley Perth Western Australia.
-----

Welcome to you too, Beverly. I've taken the liberty of changing the title
of this thread so as to be more in keeping with what is being discussed. I
suspect that there are many out there in email-land who have difficulties
of this nature. The Bible tells us that we are made "in the image of God"
Others say something similar. It is unfortunate that many choose to teach
basic principles of dealing one with another in fellowship with
thoughtfulness etc. by laying down rules and then instilling them in
children with many threats of anihilation etc. if not followed to
perfection. This is the kind of thing that leads to your dilemma. In my
opinion, we would do far better to teach kids "virtues" by showing them
what happens when they think about others and their feelings rather than
doing exactly what they want to do whenever they want to do it.. Once again
the principle of "love one another" Take a look at how you are dealing in
your relationship. Do you think that you should be chastised for not doing
the formal thing? Some who choose not to follow set rules are far more
committed than those who do!
Would you think God would chastise these folk for not following rules?
An Ozzie eh. I'm in Western Canada I do so love email. Here we can talk
across the waters with such ease and get a reply on the same day!.
Blessings,
Phyllis



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