Gail,
My name is Brigid, and I am very new to the group. I have been with my SO
for ten years. She has just been diagnosed in the last year, but i have been
getting to know her system for about 8 years.
I am very new to this group , (actually your post was the first I received) but
I wanted to respond to your post. The main thing I wanted to let you know is
that you shouldn't take your SO's secrecy personally. In my (limited) experience
how a system works and how open they are with names, facts, etc. has very little
to do with you. What I'm trying to say is that in every system there is usually
some form of protector....the guy (My SO's are guys anyway) who protects
everyone...from everything you can imagine, including rejection and scrutiny. If
this guy is doing his job right, the system is often very protective of any
"system secrets" are shared. Again, these decisions have more to do with your SO
than anything you have or haven't done. I know it can be painful to not know
what is going on with your SO, but to be honest, sometimes it can be even more
painful to know.

Be patient, and don't be too hard on yourself.
Brigid





________________________________


--- In mpdspouses@yahoogro ups.com, "gail.robinson" <grobinson@. ..> wrote:>> As
I read these posts, I can't help feeling a bit envious of> the openess you all
seem to experience within your SO's system.> I have been with my SO for 24
years, and I have not even been> able to know any names or specifics regarding
his interior world.> It would sure be nice to be "let-in" enough to at least
know names of > OM's when you recognize they are out. I am totally shut-out when
it> comes to any revealation of this sort. It's very painful to feel so >
shut-out when I love him so very much.> > What did any of you do to get to that
point? I'd love any feedback that> any of you have regarding this.>

> Take Care,
> Gail
>







[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]