Hi Sandra, even though I consider my group pretty dormant at times
it still looks active compared to some like there, LOL


Happy Anniversary!!! Even though my gf doesn't quite go with the
anniversary concept, our 2 year will be at the beginning of April.
We knew each other a long time before actually hooking up though.
She prefers to think of herself as being straight, but her gf is
gay! hehe

I'd say that J is probably the most outspoken in my gf's system and
without the deep friendship I have with him I don't think there
would be one with my gf. I feel like the luckiest person on earth to
have this chance with them, even though at times it can be
overwhelming.

Anyways, I will send you an invite to our group......hope to see
you.

chris


--- In mpdspouses@yahoogroups.com, Sandra <rainbowjoker1982@y...>
wrote:
> Chris,
>
> Thanks very much for your response. I found it refreshing and a
bit insightful.
>
> As you said, every system is different. For example, my g/f has a
split personality that deals with all the switching... BJ is the
host, and then there's Betty... She's the one who wants to do
nothing when everyone has an opinion on what to do, what to eat,
etc.... BJ is everyone combined... She can be more co-operative than
anyone. Unfortunately, she has trouble coming out because Betty was
created to deal with things.... I just met BJ a couple months ago...
It's sad because BJ is who really really wants to be presenting the
most. I love them all though, but Betty can be hard to deal with
sometimes. She has so many issues dealing with compromise of the
others and her own needs. BJ will speak up, Betty won't.
>
> Coinsedently, today is our one year anniversary.... I am happy as
is she. We will continue to grow together as a couple, and she
towards intergration (she also has an outside voice which we believe
to be schziophrenic)... I have a feeling that she will become more
the person I did fall in love with. I myself deal with bipolar, and
may be a bit borderline personality... It's difficult, but we are
there for each. She knows and understands me better than anyone in
my whole life.. That's what I truly believe.
>
> Thanks again for writing and I would like to join your little
group, especially if it's more active.
>
> Take care, and good luck with the long distance thing.
>
> mpdspouses@yahoogroups.com wrote:
>
>
> There are 2 messages in this issue.
>
> Topics in this digest:
>
> 1. Re: Tips for helping gf
> From: mor2_love
> 2. Meet loyal, devoted and smart religious friends&singles???
> From: "daniel_hotguy2000"
>
>
>
_____________________________________________________________________
___
>
_____________________________________________________________________
___
>
> Message: 1
> Date: Wed, 23 Mar 2005 16:56:59 -0000
> From: mor2_love
> Subject: Re: Tips for helping gf
>
>
> Hi Sandra, it looks like this group isn't too active anymore.
>
> I'm on my second DID relationship and both have been long
distance.
> The first ended in disaster as it turned out my gf's system was
more
> about blame and mental abuse than working on her healing. To this
> day that still hurts very much as I did love them so deeply.
>
> In my relationship now I try to visit at least every 3 months and
> make it a point to be here on the rougher months, like now.
>
> You're lucky to have all those inside love you, and although every
> system is different there could always be new ones to surface that
> don't, so just a little forwarning.
>
> The only tip I can offer is to never be deceitful to any of them,
or
> break a promise that you have control over. I say "control over"
> because last year I was asked by my "gf" if we could get an
> aquarium. I said sure and then later found out it wasn't her and
> that an aquarium is not something she wants in the house right
now.
> It was frustrating to know they "tricked" me by pretending to be
> her, and at the same time put me in a place of having to break my
> promise which I try to avoid at all costs.
>
> Also try to keep in mind that if she chooses to integrate, then
> chances are she will not continue to always be the person you are
> with now. It could be in many ways too. Less important things with
> my gf have been her always drinking coffee, then 6 months later
> saying she got too cranky with more than one cup, so switched to
> decaf, and now I'm told she NEVER drinks decaf as it is nasty and
> it's the real stuff or nothing. This is frustrating though,
because
> the truth is she DOES get crankier on the real stuff and things
did
> go smoother when she had cut down on it.
>
> If you'd like a group that's a little more active, I have one
under
> this same addy's name. You can email me if your interested. We're
a
> very small group with a variety of posters. Lil's post there too
so
> if your gf has lils they might make some good friends. My best
buddy
> J is one of my gf's insiders and the group jr moderator! Good luck
> with everything........
>
> chris
>
>
>
> --- In mpdspouses@yahoogroups.com, "Sandra"
> wrote:
> >
> > Hi, my name is Sandra and I'm new here... I've been looking up
> > info on DID ever since my gf told me about her "voices". She's
> been
> > diagnosed, as I thought she would be, and I've been doing my
best
> to
> > help support her and be there for her. We've been together
almost
> a
> > year and we live together. I know all her parts now, and they
all
> > totally love me. This is great for it helps me, a non-
> > disassociator, to truly believe she is completely in love with
me!
> > :-)
> >
> > What I am asking if you guys (who have more experience with you
> > spouse or lover than I do) if you have any tips, ways of helping
> her
> > cope, and for me to better be there for her.
> >
> > Many thanks,
> >
> > Sandra
>
>
>
>
>
>
_____________________________________________________________________
___
>
_____________________________________________________________________
___
>
> Message: 2
> Date: Thu, 24 Mar 2005 10:40:21 -0000
> From: "daniel_hotguy2000"
> Subject: Meet loyal, devoted and smart religious friends&singles???
>
>
> Meet loyal, devoted and smart religious friends&singles???
>
> We all are devoted Muslim singles seeking for a lifepartner !!
>
> http://www.geocities.com/search1friend_2000/
> http://www.geocities.com/search1girl_2000/
>
>
>
>
>
>
_____________________________________________________________________
___
>
_____________________________________________________________________
___
>
>
>
> -------------------------------------------------------------------
-----
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>
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>
>
> -------------------------------------------------------------------
-----
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ~*~ Sandi ~*~
>
>
>
>
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