Gee Sue..I really feel for ya..

I don't quite know what to say.. This does remind me of an article i
read on a mental site that if the MPD is high functioning..then leave
well enough alone.. That is this particular woman's case...she had a
good relationship with her parents and the doctors decided to leave
well enough alone.

Is this the indication for therapy? that if the MPD person is not
doing well..not functioning..then therapy is necessary to integrate
the selves?

Sue, if anything..you have indicated to me how difficult it must be
to the the *supportive one* the strong one..able to handle anything.
Remember , strong people need support to.

hugs!

ccupid

--- In mpdspouses@yahoogroups.com, "docjake33909 <docjake1@e...>"
<docjake1@e...> wrote:
> Hello all. I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I thought
> this was a site for spouses/significant others of persons with
> DID/MPD. Most posts seem to be from the DID sufferers, not
> spouses.
> My partner and I have been together 7+ years. I am 38, she is 29.
> She was rediagnosed with DID about 2 years ago and has been in
> treatment with a very caring and dedicated therapist ever since.
> She and her therapist both claim that she is making progress and
are
> working through abreactive therapy currently. My concern is that,
> though she may be doing better at accepting her diagnosis and the
> abusive childhood that led up to her DID, she is
crumbling/withering
> away before my eyes. She has lost 25-30 pounds (she was thin to
> begin with), is self-abusing more than ever, and has recently had
> what the therapist believes are body memories to the point that she
> is a haunted shell of skin and bone and scar tissue. She was
> hospitalized for hypokalemia and now is battling decreased kidney
> function along with the low potassium (brought on, we think, by a
> concurrent eating disorder, some vomiting by one of her
> personalities, poor nutrition, and prior atemmpted suicide attepts
> via drug overdoses). She is depressed all the time and has up to
10
> anxiety attacks a day. Not long ago she acted mostly normally,
> looked normal and carried on a productive life. Now, she can
barely
> do anything and looks awful and the slightest thing makes her cry
> and want to die. If this is "getting better", I sorta wish she
> wasn't. I know, I know, it's part of the process, but it's killing
> her, making me crazy, damaging our relationship severely. I want
to
> escape from this, but I feel trapped. I know that doesn't sound
> supportive, and I feel terribly guilty for that, but I am so
unhappy
> and she knows it and it's just making things worse for her. I just
> want it all to go away so we can get back to being "normal". I
want
> to be supportive, but I, too, need some support. She feels
> resentful and hurt that I am not more supportive, but I'm doing the
> best I can. I make all the money, take care of all the household
> chores, accept her diagnosis, support her therapy, and have read
> some books, but I still cannot help feeling overwhelmed and annoyed
> that I have to do everything. And get no gratitude, only ridicule
> for not being more involved. Sex is non-existent due to many
> reasons, not the least of which is that I am horrified to look at
> her concentration-camp-survivor looking body and the resentment
that
> has built up between us. I drink too much at times as a way to try
> to escape, I'm guessing. It sometimes works for a short bit. I
> used to be a person who enjoyed life and cherished all the little
> things and could feel happy in any given moment. Now I am a sour,
> tense, sad, resentful person. I need therapy myself, but cannot
> afford it. (I forgot to mention that I had to cancel all our
credit
> cards and take her name off our savings account because she has a
> spending problem and has depleted our savings account and run up
> tens of thousands of credit card bills.) Needless to say, our home
> is not one conducive to healing, and I've no clue what to do. I
> won't abandon her. I do love her and wish I could snap my fingers
> and take away all her pain, but I can't. I just keep hoping that
> things will change soon and that we both can hang on until then.
> Sue