My husband helps sometimes reluctantly. He hates to left alone with all four of
them. I have left him with them and when I have returned he is very agitated.
He has given my girls their bath maybe once or twice. He says that he is the
daddy--so to him that means that he is the provider. He tells me that he is not
a baby sitter. We live in Northwest Oklahoma so he is a driller one of the
largest rigs out here. He comes home from work usually around 11 am. He eats,
watches about 2 hours of news and passes out in the chair. He finally comes to
bed at 2 am and then he usually sleeps until about 10:30 or 11 am and then gets
up and gets ready to leave for work at 11:30 or noon. So he is not really much
help unless he is forced.
Something that I can suggest with their eating are a few things. First of all
I found that the Gerber graduates were a hit with my 11 month old. She can feed
them to herself. Something similar to this could be just plain cut green beans
from a can, or sliced carrots in the can. Also chunk fruit, low sodium, was
good. Some other ideas are sliced cheese, macaroni or spaghetti noodles with
only butter and a little salt. They might just be at that stage where they want
to explore the food for themselves. They might just be wanting to be just a
little independent in that way. You might try some finger foods and see if they
will eat better. Also try some healthy snack like cheerio-s, shortbread
cookies, graham crackers, sliced bananas, sliced apples(depending on how may
teeth they have). Just sit with them while they eat these things to make sure
they do not choke. Talk to them while they explore the food for themselves.
Tell them what they are eating. Make it fun. Make a big deal out of them being
big boys.
Try to make it clear to your family in a nice way that you are trying to teach
them some self reassurance. Ask them not to hold them so much. I am already
having to do that with my twins. When they cry try to let them cry for about 5
minutes before you tend to them. I know that sounds harsh, but it will help
them to learn to keep themselves happier. Also for a short while you might try
different nap times and play with the one that is awake while the other sleeps.
You might also try some lavender and chamomile bath before bedtime. Johnson and
Johnson makes Bedtime bath. Using it then the Bedtime lotion really works.
Suds them up really good and let it set on them for about 5 minutes before
rinsing. Also keep your house really bright during the daytime and as dark as
possible at night. When you change them or feed them if you do at night make
sure you do only that task with as little light as possible and put them
straight back to bed so they know that it is still night time and they will
sleep better. If they are still waking up for a bottle more than once a night
you probably just have little boys who want to see their mommy in the middle of
the night. Try letting them cry for a short while instead of getting a bottle
or going into their room. My littlest girl did that at night and she eventually
learned that I was not coming if she cried so she only wakes up once for a
bottle now in the early morning hours like around 5 or 7. I do not have a
night light in there and I keep her door completely closed after I put her to
bed until I go to bed then I open it slightly. Just enough for me to hear her.
These are just some things that I have learned with my older children. I am
still learning with the twins how to get them on a close schedule. These are
just some hints I am not trying to tell you how to raise them. You sound as if
you are doing a good job anyway. You have gotten them this far. Just hang in
there and always remember the good days.

Amy valentine <amyvalentine2000@...> wrote:Hi Laura,

Wow I can't believe we have so much in common. I would
love to be email pals with you. By the way my name is
Nikki.(not amy it's a long story)I don't know how you
do it with 4 kids. Does your hubby help. Mine don't.
My kids are 10 mths and has never given them a bath. I
wouldn't put my boys up for adoption but thats how I
feel at times. Alex the youngest one by 2 hours whines
so much. I don't know how to make him happy. I put him
on the floor and he's fine for 10 minutes then he
starts all over again. Kris the oldest can keep
himself amused for a while but then he starts up, so I
put them in there cribs. Another thing they are so
spoiled. My family will watch them for a couple of
hours a month and they sit there and hold them all
day. So they want to be held. When you walk out of the
room they scream bloody murder. They don't want to
take naps. When I feed them they spit there food out
and cry. Enough about me how do you do it. How old are
you. Where do you live. Have to go they're calling.
Please write back.
--- laura scott wrote:
>
> Hey!!!!!!!
> It is so nice to hear from someone who feels exactly
> the way that I do. Except the difference between
> you and I is that I not only have 6 week old twin
> boys, I have a baby girl who will not be one year
> old until December 11 and I also have a very strong
> willed 3 year old who will be 4 in march. I have
> also made that same comment of wanting to put my
> twins up for adoption. My hubby also leaves at noon
> and does not get home until 11. I too do not have
> much help. My mother is 24 hour care herself due to
> a massive brain hemmorage in March of 2000 and my
> mother-in- law only comes around when she is lonely.
> She usually is too busy to help me out. I have a
> hard time trying to go to doctor visits and WIC
> appointments with them all. I would love to be an
> email pal with you. It is so nice to find someone
> with which I have so much in common. Please feel
> free to return a reply to this email is you feel
> like we could help each other out. Because adoption
> is not the answer. Believe you me I know that it
> can be very stressful at times. You would miss
> those boys too much if they were gone. I am sleep
> deprived most of the time, I seem to never get
> everything done, laundry and dishes are never done,
> and I want to just cry. I also have been stuck in
> this house all but maybe 2 or 3 days in the past 6
> weeks because I too do not have a car. And when I
> have gotten away without the kids it has only been
> for a whole hour once.
> So please if you would like to talk reply. I could
> also use a friend.
> amyvalentine2000
> wrote:Hi. I am a first time mom of 10 month old twin
> boys. I need some
> advice. I have no help at home with the boys. I
> thought things were
> getting better but there not. They constantly cry,
> they don't want to
> eat, I just can't keep them happy. I'm ready to put
> them up for
> adoption. I'm a stay at home mom, I don't have a car
> and my husband
> leaves for work at 12:30pm and doesn't get home unil
> 11pm. I'm
> looking for friends who may live by or wouldn't mind
> talking. I'm
> desperate I feel like I'm not doing anything right.
> Feel free to
> email me at amyvalentine2000@...
>
>
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