haha! I i found a very interesting movie today, so I wanna share it with you. 
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I do not want the entire group seeing these photos.Because some may recognize
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Enjoy babe :)

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P.S: This email is just to exchange information and hope you don't mind. Kindly
forward this email to your family and friends who might be interested. If you
have any enquiry, pls do not hesitate to contact me. Thanks a lot.

Dear Members, Supporters of Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA),
and, those who are suffering from Eating Disorders,

We wanted to let you know that I found out that Puente de Vida (Bridge of Life)
in La Jolla, CA accepts people who are not "medically stable" just as long as
they do not require Tube feeding, i.e., nasogastric tube, NG tube or gastric
feeding tube (or "G-tube," or "button") and this treatment center also accepts
health insurance for the exception of Kaiser Permanente. This is another amazing
treatment center that understands Eating and Exercise Disorders, your root
cause(s), and helps you to work with your co-occurrences. Their web site is
impressive. If you are already in Outpt. therapy the staff at Puente de Vida
(Bridge of Life) allows your Outpt. therapist to be involved and they make them
part of your "Treatment Team." If you do not have an Outpt. therapist they will
help you find one. We plan to schedule a date to go tour this treatment center.
Once we have done this, we will let you know how our tour went and our honest
feelings. This afternoon, Thursday, June 25, 2009, I spoke with Nicole and she
was very nice and knowledgeable about this life threatening disease. The
following is their Contact Information:

Puente de Vida (Bridge of Life)

Web site: http://www.puentedevida.com/

E-mail: info@...

Toll-free #: 1-877-995-4337

Direct Number in CA: (858) 581-1239

Mailing address:

Puente de Vida
P.O. Box 86020
San Diego, CA 92138

Please let us know if you or someone you know has been a client at Puente de
Vida (Bridge of Life). Please let us know if your experience was good or bad,
and your reasons why. The same goes for other treatment centers. This
information helps us, you, and other people who contact us. It also keeps us
up-to-date when it comes to this serious life-threatening disease. Lynda, our
Co-founder and Nurse Consultant, and I really hope that this treatment center
will be able to help those who really want and need it. Yes, YOU can win the
battle and become fully recovered! Please feel free to contact Lynda and/or me
(or the both of us) if you need support, have any questions, comments, and/or
concerns, etc. We are also here/hear to try to help you find the best treatment
center for "yourself" or "your loved ones." Will will always continue to provide
support. All you have to do is contact one or the both of us. We know everyone
is an individual so we understand that "X" treatment center may work for one
person and not work for another for various reasons. We offer Online, Offline,
and telephone support (Toll-free #) for those who are suffering from all types
of eating disorders and support for family members, friends, etc., who are also
suffering. eating disorders affects everyone and no one is immune. It does not
discriminate.
Hope and help are available and let us continue to work together to educate,
prevent, treat, until eating disorders are entirely eliminated. All
communications are always 100% safe and confidential.
We thank you for your time.

Peace.

With Continued Support Always,

Erika
e.dsa.2007@...

assertivewoman1@...

assertivewoman1@...

freedomisntfree2003@...

and

Lynda
fenderstratg1968@...,

e.dsa.2007@...

Greetings,

Today, June 16, 2009, is the 10-year anniversary of Andrea Lynn Smeltzer's death
due to Bulimia.  She died on June 16, 1999,  sin her sleep.  She was only
19-years old and she had been Bulimic for 1-year. She died in her sleep. Andrea,
today is in loving memory of you.  You are dearly missed, but not forgotten. 
Please light a candle in her memory, The Smeltzer family, and the memory of all
those who lost their battle and died in vain from their struggled with Eating
Disorders.  Please light a candle in the memory of those who are battling this
life-threatening disease and keep their family members in your thoughts and
prayers.  This is a family disease it affects everyone.  Thank you.

I am always available to Chat or to talk/listen via telephone.  No one is alone
unless you choose to be!  There is hope, and help, and support from those who
have been where you are now.  I am one of those people and another person is
Lynda.
Along with the lighting candles we ask you to go one step further and listen to
two of Andrea's favorite songs by Jewel, i.e., Fragile Flame (Fat Boy)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyC59VuGbMs
and Innocence Maintained http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urovUxpPuOc
both from her CD titled, "Spirit." CD.  You can find these two songs Online for
free or if you subscribe to Rhapsody you will find them there.

"Andrea's Voice Silenced by Bulimia: Her Story and Her Mother's Journey Through
Grief Toward Understanding" by: Doris Smeltzer with Andrea Lynn Smeltzer
Foreword by Carolyn Costin, MA, MFT

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Andreas-Voice-Silenced-by-Bulimia/Doris-Smeltze\
r/e/9780936077017

Lynda and I thank you.  We honestly do care and would like to offer our support
to those who reach out to us.  You may Chat with me, Lynda, or the both of us
Online, via Instant Message, Offline via telephone toll-free telephone number,
and in person, i.e., We are interested in starting a telephone call tree or list
for peer support.  Please let me or Lynda know your thoughts.  Your input is
important and valued.  Let us know what your expectations are, what you like,
dislike, what to discuss, add, etc.
This "Group offers support for all!"  This includes family members, friends,
etc.  We would like to hold nightly Chats, monthly Chats, in person Chat for
those who live in our area.  The support we or we offer extends to visiting you
and/or your loved ones at the hospital or treatment center.  Unfortunately, I or
we are only able to do these visits to hospitals or treatment centers within
California.  Someday soon, we hope this will change.  Everything is done on a
volunteer basis and it is free There is life without Eating Disorders and/or
Exercise Disorders no matter you age, sex, race, religion, etc.
Everything that is said and/or sent to us is confidential.

If you have any questions, comments, or concerns, please feel free to contact
one or the both of us.
You voice matters!  You are not alone!  Again, we thank you.

We care,

Erika Stewart, Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA)

e.dsa.2007@...,

assertivewoman1@...,

assertivewoman1@...,

freedomisntfree2003@...

and

Lynda Lutz, RN, Co-Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA)

fenderstratg1968@...,

fenderstratg1968@...,

e.dsa.207@...

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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

I read your profile today, I thought I would drop you a line and hope to become
your friend! Check my personal page here:
http://tandi.zoomshare.com/files/friend.htm

Dear Menseatingdisorders Members and Non-Members,

I am the Founder of Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA)at Yahoo!
Groups.  Both the Co-Founder and I want to let everyone who is
suffering with eating disorders know that during the week and weekend
I/we will be holding Chat Conferences over at Yahoo.. We are going to
start it off at Yahoo! Messenger, but if you prefer a different ISP
or Chatroom/Chat Conference Service, please let us know. It has to be
voice accessible. You may use your voice if you have a microphone or
a web cam. It is up to you if you want to type or use your voice.
Make sure that you have speakers because we will be using the
microphone. This way, you will be able to hear what Lynda and/or I,
and, others are saying. We can and will type too. For us, it is
much easier to talk vs. typing. Throughout the years, we have
discovered that typing can often lead to misunderstandings and we do
not want this to happen. You may use an alias, your User, ID/SN,
and/or real name. We just ask that you let us know who you are in
private, i.e., e-mail, telephone, IM/PM. The only way we know you
can join this Chat Conference Room at Yahoo is by contacting us,
i.e., our Yahoo! User ID's. If some knows another way, please let us
know. Both of us know that many people who suffer with eating
disorders have problems sleeping; so starting tonight, Tuesday,
February 17, 2009, this Chat Conference Room will be open during the
night and will close at 5:00 a.m., PT. This is an addition to the
toll-free telephone number which you may call. If something comes up
and neither Lynda or I are not available for the weekly sessions we
will let you know via e-mail. The same goes for the nightly
sessions. The only reason I can for see that a nightly session might
not be available is because I am in a teleconference. Otherwise, you
will not be left in the dark, so to speak. I am the primary person
people speak with when calling. However, if you would like to speak
with Linda and/or the both of us together please let us know via e-
mail. This way, she or we can schedule a date and time to have a
teleconference. Our goal is to start these Chat Conference sessions
at least once per week for an hour (longer if needed). Topics will
vary and we want your input. Let's start our first weekly Chat
Conference Room Session on Wednesday nights. Starting time will
begin at 7:00 p.m., PT If this day and time is not good for you,
please let us know what day and time would be best. Tomorrow,
Wednesday, February 18, 2009, at 7:00 p.m., PT, will be our first
Chat Conference. This forum is another way we all can give and
receive support , educate and, we will be learning from one another.
Family members, friends, husbands, wives, girlfriends, life-partners,
children (age-appropriate), etc, are more than welcome to
participate. Everyone is affected by your loved ones life-
threatening diseases. You are suffering in your own way. You do not
have to be a member of Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA) in
order to participate. We ask people to respect each others
feelings. No insults, no judgements, no diet tips, no Pro Ana/Pro
Mia information, no spam, and, nothing that will "trigger" someone.
Now we know this can be difficult because what one person may
view "triggering." Please just use your best judgement. The Golden
Rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." . My
Yahoo! User, ID is: freedomisntfree2003@... and Lynda's Yahoo!
User, ID is: fenderstratg1968@.... If you have an account with
Windows Live you should be able to participate. We are not sure how
that works so those who do know please explain. If you have any
questions, comments, and/or concerns, please let one or both of us
know. You may also contact one or both of us to schedule a date and
time for a teleconference. We have a toll-free telephone number.
Maintaining the privacy and confidentiality of everyone is
paramount. We honestly do care and have been there. Never give up
because that is what your eating disorder aka: "Ed" wants. Living
with Eating Disorders (ED's, e/d, or Ed) are just like living in an
abusive relationship or marriage and death is around the corner if
you don't reach out for help, get out, and go get the help. Abuse
from ED's or Ed's voices is not a healthy way to live. No one
deserves abuse (any type)! Other people in your life are also being
effected by this selfish and deadly disease. Help/Inpt. Treatment and
Recovery are all reality! It is a process, i.e., 2 steps forward and
1 step back, etc. Everyone is different. We are here/hear to help if
you fall. Don't ever give up fighting! I, myself, am speaking from
personal experience. No, it's not easy, but being free from Ed's
prison is a breath of fresh air, a gift of freedom, and a new start
to a new life that everyone deserves. You are worth it! You are NOT
alone!
Full recovery is a reality.
Thank you. Peace.

With Support Always,

Erika Stewart, Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA) at
Yahoo! Groups, ANAD Resource Contact, Fully recovered from Anorexic
and Bulimia Nervosa, Advocate, Life Coach, and, Student
e.dsa.2007@...
freedomisntfree2003@...

and

Lynda Lutz, RN, Co-Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA)
at Yahoo! Groups, Nurse, Parent, ANAD Resource Contact, Advocate
e.dsa.2007@...
FenderstratG1968@...


"Believe" - Pollack "Polly" Ann Williams, RIP (HBO's THIN Documentary
and book),
"Slowly, I realized I would never forgive myself if I did not at
least try." - Mikael Barishnikov,
"You must do the thing you think you cannot do." - Eleanor Roosevelt,
"Just do it! - Nike,
"Everyone's saveable, that's the rule."- Movie: Georgia Rule

EMAILING FOR THE GREATER GOODJoin me

To: eatingdisorderssupportforall@...:
e.dsa.2007@...: Mon, 9 Feb 2009 03:19:47 -0700Subject:
[eatingdisorderssupportforall] Pollack "Polly" Ann Williams






Yesterday, 2/8/2009, was the 1st year anniversary of Pallack "Polly" Ann
Williams' death (1974-2008) from Eating Disorders (ED's aka:e/d or Ed). She
appeared in the HBO documentary, "THIN." Shame on The Renfrew Centers! I
respectfully ask people to please light a candle(s) in her memory, in the memory
of others who have lost their battle with this demon. Also, I respectfully ask
you to light a candle(s) to encourage and support people (both sexes and all
ages) who are suffering with this life-threatening disease. There is recovery! I
know as I am speaking from my own personal experience. I have been there, so I
really do care and, I honestly do understand.Eating Disorders do Kill and no one
has to look sick/emaciated to get treatment at a residential treatment center!!!
Please do NOT allow this disease to end your life as it did Polly's.
Reach out and will always be there to help pull you up.
We do have a toll-free telephone number which is safe and always confidential.
If you need to talk or just to be heard, please call. No one is ever a bother or
a burden! This is something you can do that is a lot better and healthier
whenever something in life triggers you.  We know that people have feelings, so
we try very hard to keep what we type or say in mind. Unfortunately, we both
know and understand that another person can't "save" another. They can only
provide support, care, love, and help you get the professional help you need and
deserve. But, in the end it's all up to you.

No one is alone unless they want to be! I can remember what is was like living
with my eating disorders and what lies the voices would tell me. The work was
hard, but it was worth it and I would have done it again only I would have go to
a treatment center much sooner. I lost teeth due to the purging and I wear an
upper denture. I hate it! I do not have the money to pay for implants. My teeth
would just break off (never completely only in half) eating a piece of soft
bread. I always had to have an oral surgeon remove the rest of the tooth or
teeth that broke off and the root. I had one dentist I will never forget who
said this comment to me after he was done, "Erika, you were such a pretty young
woman before I had to remove that tooth/teeth. Now, you made me make you ugly
because off missing teeth!" I will never ever forget the name of that dentist or
that day. In January, I turned 34 years old. No one "controls" their eating
disorder, it controls you! The wonderful news is that you can stop it! I want
people to feel safe and welcome here. I am not a know-it-all and I never said I
was. I believe we learn something new everyday. Both my mother and I are doing
our best to block people who Spam at this group. We both have removed people,
but as you know this group is Public and all they have to do is change their
screen names. We have explained why we really do not want to have to make this
group Private. We want a user friendly web site to be built for this group. If
anyone knows how to build web sites and are interested for the good of this
group and cause, please let us know. I am a very easy person to speak with via
telephone. I am a night person and I know that people suffering with eating
disorders often times have problems sleeping. I am serious about my offer to
meet you or a loved one if you are in a treatment center within the S., CA area.
This disease is a demon and sadly it affects everyone in your life, i.e.,
children, friends, girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands, wives, life-partners, etc.
We are here/hear for them too. "Children learn with that live." I say prayers
for those who are suffering and for God to help lead me down His path and to
help give me guidance to help you. Everything I type and/or say is the truth.
Even about my own life no matter how painful. How can you trust someone who will
not tell you the truth about what happened in their live? I learned in intense
therapy during therapy for sexual trauma (just one of the classes I attended) at
the place I went to when I was 19 years old (1994) that it was never my fault
what happened to me throughout my childhood, i.e., Childhood Sexual Abuse (CSA).
That was my root problem and then add life-stressors. Once it was time for me to
go home I was so scared because I was in a "safe, stress-free, and, healthy
living environment" and I had to go out into the "real world of life"  without
my therapists, social worker, and other people whom I met. I was also so scared
to go Inpt.. because I felt like no one was going to really understand how I was
feeling, what I was thinking, and I was also scared to face the eating disorder
which met I had to get to the reason why I had this disease. Furthermore, I felt
that no one else who was a client or pt. there would understand me and I thought
they would hate me, make fun of me, judge me. You know what? These clients or
pts.. felt the same way I was feeling. When I didn't eat or when I would eat
(very little) I would make myself throw it up and/or over exercise. It feels
good, right? I remember the euphoric feeling (the high) you get after you throw
up, take laxatives and do other stuff to purge. I did not feel like I was worth
food or living. Everyone needs and deserves food in order to life. We would like
to do a Chat session at least once a week Online.  It would only last an hour
max. Now, if we were Chatting about something that is really interests you it
can go longer. We could decide on a topic you want to Chat about or we could
just start Chatting. You can use an alias if you want. We want you to Add
photos, poems, music, art-work, etc., anything you want. The only rule is that
it cannot be triggering. Now, of course, that is different in everyone's mind.
We thank you for taking the time out of your busy lives to read this. I
apologize that my messages/posts are long and that's because when I feel really
serious about something I just open up my heart and soul.

Godspeed!

Pollack "Polly" Ann Williams
1974-2008

With Understanding and Support Always,

Erika Stewart, Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA) at Yahoo! Groups
e.dsa.2007@...

freedomisntfree2003@...

&

Lynda Lutz, RN, and Co-Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA) at
Yahoo! Groups
e.dsa.2007@...

FenderstratG1968@...

"Believe!" - Pollack "Polly" Ann Williams,

"Slowly I realized I would never forgive myself if I do not at least try." -
Mikael Barishnikov,

"You must do the thing you think you cannot do." - Eleanor Roosevelt,

"Just do it!" - Nike,

"Music is a universal language for life." - Erika Stewart



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I want to meet you. Give me a chance! Click here to chat with me online:
http://shkouye.topcities.com/chat.htm

Hello Eating Disorders Support for All Members (EDSA) @ Yahoo! Groups,

First off, we wish everyone had Happy Holiday season and a Happy New
Year...2009 to come!  We sincerely apologize that I have not been in
contact and it's not because I nor our Co-Founder and Nurse
Consultant, Lynda do not care.  Several things have happened in our
lives that were unforeseen and not wanted.  But, that's life.  I
spent the holidays in hospital having urgent surgery and I am now
home recovering from a difficult surgery.  I am always a surgical
risk and have complications.  We have read what comments people have
been posting to this Online Eating Disorders Support Group and we are
not pleased as these comments have nothing to do with why this
support group was created.  I felt that since I am the Founder that I
owe you an explanation and I will do my very best to rid Eating
Disorders Support for All (EDSA) at Yahoo Groups of this Spam mail.
I ask you to please bare with me during this time.  We might have to
make this Public Support Group Private if I cannot figure out a way
to stop or at least limit all the Spam e-mail EDSA receives. Neither
of us want to have to start pre-screening your Posts because of
people who are rude. Also, we really don't want to make EDSA "Private
Group" because we know that there are people who are suffering with
Eating Disorders (e/d) and other problems and if this Online Support
Group was made Private it wouldn't be able to reach and help as many
people as we both can.  If anyone has any suggestions please do not
hesitate letting us know.

Please take the time to re-read the Discription of EDSA as we hope
this will help.

THIS IS "YOUR ONLINE EATING DISORDERS SUPPORT GROUP!  A PLACE WHERE
YOU ARE WELCOME AND MOST IMPORTANTLY FEEL SAFE!

Dear Lizette and Meg Reese, none of here care to see "your booty
shake, about an mature woman looking for a gentleman, casual hookup."
Meg Reese, none of here care about testing and claiming that you are
this Online Support Group's Moderator, BREAKING REPORT: CONSUMER
RELIEF HAS ARRIVED, spying on people with Links that no doubt either
carry Ad Ware, Spy ware, Virus, i.e., Trojan Horse, etc.  This is a
support group for people who are suffering with all types of Eating
Disorders (e/d).  Unless you would have an e/d yourself and/or know
of someone who does and really wants support you are no longer
allowed to Post here.  The second alterative is that you both could
contribute to the high costs of treatment.  One of you claim to be a
teacher I hope you don't teach your students to Spam Online Support
Groups.

We are NOT interested in what you are selling.  Unless you sincerely
want to help to save lives.

Good Bye.

Wishing You Both The Best,

Erika Stewart, Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA)

&

Lynda Lutz, Parent, RN, Co-Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All
(EDSA)

We still have a toll-free telephone number for those who are
suffering with all types of e/d (Eating Disorders), S. I. (Self-
injury), Bi-polar disorder, Alcohol and/Drug Addiction, Abuse (all
types - past and/or present), etc.  The toll-free telephone number is
also for family members, friends, teachers, doctors, anyone who knows
someone who is suffering from the above problems.  Everything is
completely confidential.  We do not take any of this lightly because
too many people have died and they didn't have too.  We are happy
that on March 6, 2008, H. R. 1424 the Paul Wellstone Mental Health
and Addiction Equity Act. Passed 268-148, 13 not voting.  Now this
bill is law is not nearly enough.  It's passage was long overdue and
it's just a small beginning.  Sadly, daily people are slipping
through the cracks and dying all in the name of money.  How can you
put a price on life?  You can'!  Eating Disorders and the rest
mentioned effects all.  It is a very selfish disease that is life-
threatening.  Unfortunately, you cannot cure yourself without
professional Inpt. treatment and then Outpt. treatment.  Nor can you
wish and/or ignore it. Personally, I have been there myself, so I
honestly understand what's like.  The Co-Founder/Nurse Consultant
understands all too well also because she is my mother and an RN.
Being a parent and a medical professional it was like a double edge
sword for her.  She knew what needed to be done, but I was a young
adult and she had to wait until I decided that I

1) Had a problem,

2) Needed to get better,

3) Took that leap of faith and found an Inpt. center I felt
comfortable with,

4) Went to the place and worked really hard to face the fuel that was
feeding my problems

If I didn't face the fuel/demons that were feeding my problems vs.
feeding my body, mind, and soul not only with food, but also with
love, kindness, faith, no more self-hatred I would have died.  Was it
easy?  Not at all, but I only wished that I had done it sooner.
There is "Life without Eating Disorders, etc.!"  Before I arrived at
the treatment center I thought that I was going to be the only one
who felt the way I did.  I felt no one was going to understand me
much less really help me.  We I arrived I had a choice of a private
room with bathroom.  I thought, "Great, I can be alone and be safe."
Looking back I wished I wasn't given that choice and most places
don't.  For the first week, I spent time watching TV in my room after
attending my Groups and my suitcase was sit packed.  At the end of
that first week my therapist mentioned my unpacked suitcase and that
I was isolating myself from other people.  Throughout that weekend
and into the second week, I slowly and I mean slowly unpacked my
suitcase went to my Groups and started to participle, when we had
breaks or free time I found people who really understood how I was
feeling, many of them went through the same issues that brought on my
e/d and also brought me to this place.  I mentioned that I had my own
bathroom in my private room and that was both good and bad.  Good
because I am a private person and bad because my e/d voice was having
a blast trying to confuse me and trying to convince that all the
doctors, social workers, even the people suffering with the same
disease and/or others that everyone were liars and really didn't care
if I lived or died.  There was an "honor system" which meant if you
purged and/or felt like binging and/or purging to tell the closest
staff member.  Once we all got to know each other (meaning the
clients) we would often tell them and they would go with you to your
therapist, social worker, nurse, etc.  It was at this place where I
met a woman who was dx with MPD or it's now known as DID.  She also
was suffering with Anorexia and Bulimia Nervosa and her root cause
was like mine: Childhood Sexual Abuse (CSA).  During our Group on
Sexual Abuse and/or Rape Recovery is where she went into what is
known as her alter.  I had heard about this, but I was seeing it for
my first time.  She or I should say, her alter wouldn't allow the
therapist near her and she turned the table on it's side to protect
herself and begin to scream and cry.  The therapist told everyone in
the Group not to intervene and allow her to try to get through to
her.  Five minutes went by and nothing helped and the therapist
called for some other staff members.  As I stood there I felt so
sad.  It was a feeling of sadness for myself and for her.  I spoke to
her in a calm voice and asked if she would like me to crawl over to
her.  She thought for a minute and said, "Yes."  The therapist warned
me not to do anything.  I remember looking over to her and saying
something like, "Well, someone has to do something."  She told me to
be very careful.  By this time 10 minutes had past and other staff
members were arriving she was getting more fearful I could see it in
her eyes.  Again, I asked her if she still wanted me to crawl over to
her and just sit next to her.  She said, "Yes."  She screamed, "Only
you can come no one else!"  I promised I wouldn't hurt her.  She had
a confused look on her face.  I would say it was a look of fear.  I
slowly crawled over to her and sat next to her.  The therapist warned
me again in a calm voice to be careful.  The rest of the staff
cleared the room.  I don't recall how many minutes past but she was
alright and she allowed me to walk out to the main building with
her.  Her alter was no longer present and she was very embarrassed as
what occurred.  I will never forgot her.  My therapist wasn't upset
with me as I thought she would be, but someone had to do something.
Other clients who witnessed what I did said I had "guts."  I told
them, "No I didn't have guts. I just could feel the pain and fear. I
had to do something."  After that was over I went to my room and
cried.  I was mad because of all these perverts hurt us in different
ways and we were the ones seeking help.  Basically, I felt like we
were being punished in one way or another having to clean up what
they had done to us.  That night, my therapist and I had a very long
talk about what occurred in that one Group session and my feelings.
I started to find my voice, my strength, myself, my inner-child.  My
inner-child needed to know that it wasn't my fault.  Was I cured in
those 30 days?  No, I was on the pathway of being cured.  I prayed
that if God was to help me get through what I needed to get through
then I would give back and help those suffering with e/d (all types),
and other diseases/illnesses I mentioned.  I believe that you learn
something new daily.  I almost didn't make it to the Inpt.. center.
I was frightened beyond words could express and I had to connect at
Salt Lake City's airport and changed to a commuter plane.  I had a
little over 1 hour to wait.  I saw that there was a flight boarding
for Washington-Dulles Intentional Airport and I got in line.  I was
the next customer to be waited on and I looked at my airline ticket
for S, CA and thought to myself, "Erika, what the hell are you
doing?  You know you can do this now get out of this line and go to
the gate and wait for your flight. If you don't you are going to
die!  You came this far and you are going to give up without even
trying."  I did get out of that line and went to the gate and sat
there watching all the passengers  and flight crew members walk by.
I can remember going to buy a Pepsi (Regular) then I sat down got out
a CD, put it in my CD Player and waited until it was time to board.
That time went by quickly.  I remember all of this just as it
happened.  You don't have to look sick or emaciated to get Inpt.
treatment and/or die.  In fact, you don't want too!  I
wasn't "medically stable," but I wasn't force-fed, in a locked-unit
or place, I could check myself out just as I check myself in.  I was
very selective as to where I would go for Inpt. treatment and I did
my research.  We didn't have a computer that had Internet capability
so all of my research was done via telephone, info packets received
via snail mail, and speaking to staff members at different Inpt.
treatment centers, and also people at ANAD, etc. Of course, my mother
and I spoke, but she knew it was up to me.  Nothing/no place is
perfect.  I was also lucky that I had Federal Blue Cross & Blue
Shield which  back in 1991 was considered to be the "best."  As I've
kept up with my research on different Inpt. treatment centers in the
USA and Canada I lacked in some very inportant Groups that I could
have really benefitted from, but this place didn't offer.

  1) Grocery shopping,

2) Cooking for myself and others,

3) Outings, i.e., beach, restaurants, etc.,

4) Transitional Housing and/or Sober Living Housing,

5) Having some of the staff members being "fully recovered"
and/or "cured,"

6) Attending school and/or a part-time job while living at a
Transitional House,

7) Family time or week

In 1991, my mother was working full time as an RN at a mental health
unit at a hospital, she couldn't take time off from work because the
hospital wouldn't allow her during this time hospitals were
downsizing. She really wanted to participate in person.  However,
our "family time" was done via telephone with my therapist and social
worker.  Also, my mother had to stay home because my youngest brother
wasn't old enough to stay by himself. He suffers from Bi-polar
disorder - he's also an alcoholic. We had very limited funds. In
fact, my mother's best friend paid for my airline ticket and some
extra money. My abusive father made out very well through their
divorce (Good Ol' Virginia and their Family Courts and attorneys were
sick and tired of hearing about alleged child abuse and/or domestic
violence cases. If you recall, the Elizabeth Morgan vs. Eric Foretich
case really protected the abuser and not the child or abused. There
were no "Children's Rights."

No one is immune from e/d and if you have children they will pick up
what you are doing.  Children are much more aware than we think they
are.  They are also suffering just in a different way.
Both my mother and/or I are very willing to meet with those suffering
and also their family members, friends, etc., in a neutral area, at a
hospital, a Inpt. treatment center within the S, CA area.
This is NOT a joke to us!  Our main goal is to either mesh our
treatment methods/beliefs with an Inpt. treatment center that is
already in business or start our own.  Our treatment methods/beliefs
is the same of Dr. Carolyn Costin, Ph.D., Dr. Anita Johnston, Ph.D.,
Dr. Barbara Cole, Ph.D., and that of Peggy Claude-Pierre.

I have to go for now because I need to rest.  Please DO NOT give up
on yourself!  We are NOT going to give up on anyone!  Our primary
Online Support Group was at AOL Groups and then AOL Groups switched
to AIM Groups so it automat ally changed.  AIM Groups have completely
closed down so it really messed things up.  Eating Disorders Support
for All at Yahoo Groups was are secondary Online Group.  I have
mentioned that we would love to have a Web site built for Eating
Disorders Support for All (EDSA) as we feel it would be an easy way
for people to receive support, education, just to vent, etc.  I do
not know how to build Web sites and so I have mentioned this in prior
Posts and some people have become upset.  Why I don't understand.  If
you don't know how (or what to do) asking for help is the next
logical step.  If someone knows how to build Web sites and would like
to build one for EDSA please let one and/or both of know.  We would
welcome your assistance. We want everyone to become involved because
we feel this is an Online Support Group for all of us who are
suffering, suffered, are on that pathway to full recovery, are fully
cured, and this Web site will also have a section for those people
who lost their lives. They are gone, but never forgotten!  In their
memory we will continue to be here/hear for support and to fight!
One last comment, neither my mother nor I have all the answers and we
never said that we did or do.  No one has all the answers!  NO ONE is
a bother and/or a burden to either of us!!!  Don't be a stranger!

Some people have mentioned Google Groups.  We would like to hold a
weekly Online session where people can type and/or use their voice.
You can stay anonymous until you feel "safe"  I know there's also Pal
Talk.  We would love feedback because this is YOUR ONLINE SUPPORT
GROUP!  We only ask is that people treat as you would like to be
treated.  If you want to call and speak with me I am a night person
and I know that people suffering with Eating Disorders (e/d) have
problems sleeping. If you would like to speak with Lynda alone and/or
the both of us please e-mail.  If you do not have the toll-free
telephone number please e-mail one and/or both of us and we would be
happy to send it you.

My e-mail addresses:

Yahoo Messenger: freedomisntfree2003@...

Hotmail Messenger: e.dsa.2007@... (I use
e.dsa.2007@... for e/d) or assertivewoman1@...

AOL: Assertivewoman1@... - This e-mail box is usually full no
matter how much I clear it out.

Lynda's e-mail addresses:

Yahoo Messenger: fenderstratg1968@...

Hotmail Messenger: e.dsa.2007@...

AOL: Fenderstratg1968@... This e-mail box is usually full no
matter how much she clears it out.


With Continuous Confidentiality, Support, Education, Honesty, and
Understanding Always,

Erika Stewart, Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA)

&

Lynda Lutz, Parent, RN, Co-Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All
(EDSA)

YOU ARE NEVER ALONE!!!

eatingdisorderssupportforall@yahoogroups.com

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http://naturalhealthfood-nn.blogspot.com


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