Hello Eating Disorders Support for All Members (EDSA) @ Yahoo! Groups,

First off, we wish everyone had Happy Holiday season and a Happy New
Year...2009 to come! We sincerely apologize that I have not been in
contact and it's not because I nor our Co-Founder and Nurse
Consultant, Lynda do not care. Several things have happened in our
lives that were unforeseen and not wanted. But, that's life. I
spent the holidays in hospital having urgent surgery and I am now
home recovering from a difficult surgery. I am always a surgical
risk and have complications. We have read what comments people have
been posting to this Online Eating Disorders Support Group and we are
not pleased as these comments have nothing to do with why this
support group was created. I felt that since I am the Founder that I
owe you an explanation and I will do my very best to rid Eating
Disorders Support for All (EDSA) at Yahoo Groups of this Spam mail.
I ask you to please bare with me during this time. We might have to
make this Public Support Group Private if I cannot figure out a way
to stop or at least limit all the Spam e-mail EDSA receives. Neither
of us want to have to start pre-screening your Posts because of
people who are rude. Also, we really don't want to make EDSA "Private
Group" because we know that there are people who are suffering with
Eating Disorders (e/d) and other problems and if this Online Support
Group was made Private it wouldn't be able to reach and help as many
people as we both can. If anyone has any suggestions please do not
hesitate letting us know.

Please take the time to re-read the Discription of EDSA as we hope
this will help.

THIS IS "YOUR ONLINE EATING DISORDERS SUPPORT GROUP! A PLACE WHERE
YOU ARE WELCOME AND MOST IMPORTANTLY FEEL SAFE!

Dear Lizette and Meg Reese, none of here care to see "your booty
shake, about an mature woman looking for a gentleman, casual hookup."
Meg Reese, none of here care about testing and claiming that you are
this Online Support Group's Moderator, BREAKING REPORT: CONSUMER
RELIEF HAS ARRIVED, spying on people with Links that no doubt either
carry Ad Ware, Spy ware, Virus, i.e., Trojan Horse, etc. This is a
support group for people who are suffering with all types of Eating
Disorders (e/d). Unless you would have an e/d yourself and/or know
of someone who does and really wants support you are no longer
allowed to Post here. The second alterative is that you both could
contribute to the high costs of treatment. One of you claim to be a
teacher I hope you don't teach your students to Spam Online Support
Groups.

We are NOT interested in what you are selling. Unless you sincerely
want to help to save lives.

Good Bye.

Wishing You Both The Best,

Erika Stewart, Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA)

&

Lynda Lutz, Parent, RN, Co-Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All
(EDSA)

We still have a toll-free telephone number for those who are
suffering with all types of e/d (Eating Disorders), S. I. (Self-
injury), Bi-polar disorder, Alcohol and/Drug Addiction, Abuse (all
types - past and/or present), etc. The toll-free telephone number is
also for family members, friends, teachers, doctors, anyone who knows
someone who is suffering from the above problems. Everything is
completely confidential. We do not take any of this lightly because
too many people have died and they didn't have too. We are happy
that on March 6, 2008, H. R. 1424 the Paul Wellstone Mental Health
and Addiction Equity Act. Passed 268-148, 13 not voting. Now this
bill is law is not nearly enough. It's passage was long overdue and
it's just a small beginning. Sadly, daily people are slipping
through the cracks and dying all in the name of money. How can you
put a price on life? You can'! Eating Disorders and the rest
mentioned effects all. It is a very selfish disease that is life-
threatening. Unfortunately, you cannot cure yourself without
professional Inpt. treatment and then Outpt. treatment. Nor can you
wish and/or ignore it. Personally, I have been there myself, so I
honestly understand what's like. The Co-Founder/Nurse Consultant
understands all too well also because she is my mother and an RN.
Being a parent and a medical professional it was like a double edge
sword for her. She knew what needed to be done, but I was a young
adult and she had to wait until I decided that I

1) Had a problem,

2) Needed to get better,

3) Took that leap of faith and found an Inpt. center I felt
comfortable with,

4) Went to the place and worked really hard to face the fuel that was
feeding my problems

If I didn't face the fuel/demons that were feeding my problems vs.
feeding my body, mind, and soul not only with food, but also with
love, kindness, faith, no more self-hatred I would have died. Was it
easy? Not at all, but I only wished that I had done it sooner.
There is "Life without Eating Disorders, etc.!" Before I arrived at
the treatment center I thought that I was going to be the only one
who felt the way I did. I felt no one was going to understand me
much less really help me. We I arrived I had a choice of a private
room with bathroom. I thought, "Great, I can be alone and be safe."
Looking back I wished I wasn't given that choice and most places
don't. For the first week, I spent time watching TV in my room after
attending my Groups and my suitcase was sit packed. At the end of
that first week my therapist mentioned my unpacked suitcase and that
I was isolating myself from other people. Throughout that weekend
and into the second week, I slowly and I mean slowly unpacked my
suitcase went to my Groups and started to participle, when we had
breaks or free time I found people who really understood how I was
feeling, many of them went through the same issues that brought on my
e/d and also brought me to this place. I mentioned that I had my own
bathroom in my private room and that was both good and bad. Good
because I am a private person and bad because my e/d voice was having
a blast trying to confuse me and trying to convince that all the
doctors, social workers, even the people suffering with the same
disease and/or others that everyone were liars and really didn't care
if I lived or died. There was an "honor system" which meant if you
purged and/or felt like binging and/or purging to tell the closest
staff member. Once we all got to know each other (meaning the
clients) we would often tell them and they would go with you to your
therapist, social worker, nurse, etc. It was at this place where I
met a woman who was dx with MPD or it's now known as DID. She also
was suffering with Anorexia and Bulimia Nervosa and her root cause
was like mine: Childhood Sexual Abuse (CSA). During our Group on
Sexual Abuse and/or Rape Recovery is where she went into what is
known as her alter. I had heard about this, but I was seeing it for
my first time. She or I should say, her alter wouldn't allow the
therapist near her and she turned the table on it's side to protect
herself and begin to scream and cry. The therapist told everyone in
the Group not to intervene and allow her to try to get through to
her. Five minutes went by and nothing helped and the therapist
called for some other staff members. As I stood there I felt so
sad. It was a feeling of sadness for myself and for her. I spoke to
her in a calm voice and asked if she would like me to crawl over to
her. She thought for a minute and said, "Yes." The therapist warned
me not to do anything. I remember looking over to her and saying
something like, "Well, someone has to do something." She told me to
be very careful. By this time 10 minutes had past and other staff
members were arriving she was getting more fearful I could see it in
her eyes. Again, I asked her if she still wanted me to crawl over to
her and just sit next to her. She said, "Yes." She screamed, "Only
you can come no one else!" I promised I wouldn't hurt her. She had
a confused look on her face. I would say it was a look of fear. I
slowly crawled over to her and sat next to her. The therapist warned
me again in a calm voice to be careful. The rest of the staff
cleared the room. I don't recall how many minutes past but she was
alright and she allowed me to walk out to the main building with
her. Her alter was no longer present and she was very embarrassed as
what occurred. I will never forgot her. My therapist wasn't upset
with me as I thought she would be, but someone had to do something.
Other clients who witnessed what I did said I had "guts." I told
them, "No I didn't have guts. I just could feel the pain and fear. I
had to do something." After that was over I went to my room and
cried. I was mad because of all these perverts hurt us in different
ways and we were the ones seeking help. Basically, I felt like we
were being punished in one way or another having to clean up what
they had done to us. That night, my therapist and I had a very long
talk about what occurred in that one Group session and my feelings.
I started to find my voice, my strength, myself, my inner-child. My
inner-child needed to know that it wasn't my fault. Was I cured in
those 30 days? No, I was on the pathway of being cured. I prayed
that if God was to help me get through what I needed to get through
then I would give back and help those suffering with e/d (all types),
and other diseases/illnesses I mentioned. I believe that you learn
something new daily. I almost didn't make it to the Inpt.. center.
I was frightened beyond words could express and I had to connect at
Salt Lake City's airport and changed to a commuter plane. I had a
little over 1 hour to wait. I saw that there was a flight boarding
for Washington-Dulles Intentional Airport and I got in line. I was
the next customer to be waited on and I looked at my airline ticket
for S, CA and thought to myself, "Erika, what the hell are you
doing? You know you can do this now get out of this line and go to
the gate and wait for your flight. If you don't you are going to
die! You came this far and you are going to give up without even
trying." I did get out of that line and went to the gate and sat
there watching all the passengers and flight crew members walk by.
I can remember going to buy a Pepsi (Regular) then I sat down got out
a CD, put it in my CD Player and waited until it was time to board.
That time went by quickly. I remember all of this just as it
happened. You don't have to look sick or emaciated to get Inpt.
treatment and/or die. In fact, you don't want too! I
wasn't "medically stable," but I wasn't force-fed, in a locked-unit
or place, I could check myself out just as I check myself in. I was
very selective as to where I would go for Inpt. treatment and I did
my research. We didn't have a computer that had Internet capability
so all of my research was done via telephone, info packets received
via snail mail, and speaking to staff members at different Inpt.
treatment centers, and also people at ANAD, etc. Of course, my mother
and I spoke, but she knew it was up to me. Nothing/no place is
perfect. I was also lucky that I had Federal Blue Cross & Blue
Shield which back in 1991 was considered to be the "best." As I've
kept up with my research on different Inpt. treatment centers in the
USA and Canada I lacked in some very inportant Groups that I could
have really benefitted from, but this place didn't offer.

1) Grocery shopping,

2) Cooking for myself and others,

3) Outings, i.e., beach, restaurants, etc.,

4) Transitional Housing and/or Sober Living Housing,

5) Having some of the staff members being "fully recovered"
and/or "cured,"

6) Attending school and/or a part-time job while living at a
Transitional House,

7) Family time or week

In 1991, my mother was working full time as an RN at a mental health
unit at a hospital, she couldn't take time off from work because the
hospital wouldn't allow her during this time hospitals were
downsizing. She really wanted to participate in person. However,
our "family time" was done via telephone with my therapist and social
worker. Also, my mother had to stay home because my youngest brother
wasn't old enough to stay by himself. He suffers from Bi-polar
disorder - he's also an alcoholic. We had very limited funds. In
fact, my mother's best friend paid for my airline ticket and some
extra money. My abusive father made out very well through their
divorce (Good Ol' Virginia and their Family Courts and attorneys were
sick and tired of hearing about alleged child abuse and/or domestic
violence cases. If you recall, the Elizabeth Morgan vs. Eric Foretich
case really protected the abuser and not the child or abused. There
were no "Children's Rights."

No one is immune from e/d and if you have children they will pick up
what you are doing. Children are much more aware than we think they
are. They are also suffering just in a different way.
Both my mother and/or I are very willing to meet with those suffering
and also their family members, friends, etc., in a neutral area, at a
hospital, a Inpt. treatment center within the S, CA area.
This is NOT a joke to us! Our main goal is to either mesh our
treatment methods/beliefs with an Inpt. treatment center that is
already in business or start our own. Our treatment methods/beliefs
is the same of Dr. Carolyn Costin, Ph.D., Dr. Anita Johnston, Ph.D.,
Dr. Barbara Cole, Ph.D., and that of Peggy Claude-Pierre.

I have to go for now because I need to rest. Please DO NOT give up
on yourself! We are NOT going to give up on anyone! Our primary
Online Support Group was at AOL Groups and then AOL Groups switched
to AIM Groups so it automat ally changed. AIM Groups have completely
closed down so it really messed things up. Eating Disorders Support
for All at Yahoo Groups was are secondary Online Group. I have
mentioned that we would love to have a Web site built for Eating
Disorders Support for All (EDSA) as we feel it would be an easy way
for people to receive support, education, just to vent, etc. I do
not know how to build Web sites and so I have mentioned this in prior
Posts and some people have become upset. Why I don't understand. If
you don't know how (or what to do) asking for help is the next
logical step. If someone knows how to build Web sites and would like
to build one for EDSA please let one and/or both of know. We would
welcome your assistance. We want everyone to become involved because
we feel this is an Online Support Group for all of us who are
suffering, suffered, are on that pathway to full recovery, are fully
cured, and this Web site will also have a section for those people
who lost their lives. They are gone, but never forgotten! In their
memory we will continue to be here/hear for support and to fight!
One last comment, neither my mother nor I have all the answers and we
never said that we did or do. No one has all the answers! NO ONE is
a bother and/or a burden to either of us!!! Don't be a stranger!

Some people have mentioned Google Groups. We would like to hold a
weekly Online session where people can type and/or use their voice.
You can stay anonymous until you feel "safe" I know there's also Pal
Talk. We would love feedback because this is YOUR ONLINE SUPPORT
GROUP! We only ask is that people treat as you would like to be
treated. If you want to call and speak with me I am a night person
and I know that people suffering with Eating Disorders (e/d) have
problems sleeping. If you would like to speak with Lynda alone and/or
the both of us please e-mail. If you do not have the toll-free
telephone number please e-mail one and/or both of us and we would be
happy to send it you.

My e-mail addresses:

Yahoo Messenger: freedomisntfree2003@...

Hotmail Messenger: e.dsa.2007@... (I use
e.dsa.2007@... for e/d) or assertivewoman1@...

AOL: Assertivewoman1@... - This e-mail box is usually full no
matter how much I clear it out.

Lynda's e-mail addresses:

Yahoo Messenger: fenderstratg1968@...

Hotmail Messenger: e.dsa.2007@...

AOL: Fenderstratg1968@... This e-mail box is usually full no
matter how much she clears it out.


With Continuous Confidentiality, Support, Education, Honesty, and
Understanding Always,

Erika Stewart, Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All (EDSA)

&

Lynda Lutz, Parent, RN, Co-Founder, Eating Disorders Support for All
(EDSA)

YOU ARE NEVER ALONE!!!

eatingdisorderssupportforall@yahoogroups.com