I started this club ages ago. Then got involved
with other things. The email account disappeared, and
I forgot it! Sorry.<br><br>Anyway, I'm Ok, and its
good to see more people here supporting realistic
acceptance.<br><br>I just wish we could start a movement that guys
could be guys while wearing a bra with normal breasts.
In my dreams I guess.<br><br>Dale

Thanx for advices mediamix1 :)

Wotan,<br><br>Keep in mind that there are three
categories of gender that come into play when diagnosing or
ruling out intersex conditions. <br><br>1. Chromosomal
Gender is what your karyotype shows, XX, XY, or some
variant like XXXO XYXO, etc.<br><br>2. Phenotypical
Gender is what we see. Female or male genitalia (or
ambiguous as in my case).<br><br>3. Gonadal Gender is what
type of tissue exists, whether testicular, ovarian,
ovoteste, or no gonads at all.<br><br>Some male babies will
look like normal girls when born, and have abdominal
testicles instead of ovaries, (CAIS, PAIS). Cases like this
will often not be diagnosed until puberty when
virilization occurs, (PAIS) or with absence of menarche. In
the salt wasting form of this disorder the babies are
in a life threatening condition of electrolyte loss
and diagnosis is made soon after birth, if not found
through amniocentesis.<br><br>In other cases where the
baby does not look like a normal girl or boy, it is
easier to detect that something rare has occured, but is
that really a boy with an empty scrotum, or could it
be a girl with clitoral hypertrophy and vaginal
atresia?<br> <br>I am a case of ambiguous genitalia, and was
sex tested before an exploratory surgery at age five
to locate a missing gonad on the left side. In
combination with the hypospadic penis, there was strong
suspicion that I could have had an ovary, (true
hermaphroditism). I also had surgeries for bladder outflow
obstruction, kidney reflux, and inguinal hernia repair. I
think they were too busy attending to that stuff to
"fix" my penis, and for that I am eternally grateful,
although that is a topic for another time.<br><br>My main
point here is that this is a very complicated subject,
not just the nuts and bolts stuff, but in the way
this affects our lives. In some cases you can't tell a
baby is or isn't intersexed by looking at the genitals
or breast tissue. Diagnosis has to be done in
context with the other variables to be
valid.<br><br><br>Doug

Glad to hear you're doing well. Life is good, smile, and be happy<br><br>cheers

Hi everyone!<br><br>I was born being intersexed
for about 23 years ago. I'm (or i was)
male-pseudohermaphrodite. When i was 15 years old i took a hard decision
and had several surgeries that make me infertile
woman. <br>Hard life, hard decisions...<br>Now i'm happy
and doing well :)

Hi,<br>I've got a quick question for everyone,
hopefully you can help me out. I'm just doing a little
research on Intersexed individuals, mainly on the
corrective surgeries available. On the isna website, I found
info about surgeries for children - but I couldn't
find much about options for post-pubescent teens, and
even older people (early 20s). What kind of procedures
are available? What is involved? What is the healing
process like? Are there many doctors out there who can
perform said procedures? <br><br>Any and all information
will be greatly appreciated. Of course, if you know of
any web resources that you could point me towards,
that would be great as well. Thank you so
much!<br><br>The Great E-Tective

Although genitalia is often a determining factor,
there are usualy other symptons.<br>For example, a
child born under or over weight might be signs. But
this is rare. Most cases are identified later in life.
Remember, there are Herma morphadites and
Psuedo-<br>morphadites. I was diagnosed with psuedomorphaditism.
hermamorphdites<br>are more obvious because they at birth<br>are born
with "abnormal" genetalia. <br>Please ignore the
misspellings, if any.<br>I do not know all the answers but I do
know some. And I will gladly share what I do know.<br>
<br> GOOD LUCK<br> Crystal S.

From what I have read (which is really not a
lot), there seems to be an emphasis on infant genitalia
as the identifying criteria of determining
intersexuality.<br><br>However, what if a male infant were born with breasts
that
seemed less male and more female (e.g., size, shape)?
Someone told me that this condition comes under
gynecomastia, but g. manifest itself primarily in adult males?

Wow! Neat bio!<br>It was rather refreshing for me
to read your message. I am in a similar situation; I
am intersexual and I'm learning how to be happy
"just being me." You know, the third sex that many
people don't know about yet: male, female, and ME!
Although, I know myself to be a little more toward the
male-side of the scale, I have been raised a female but had
been given hormone therapy that I wish I never had
been given. (it's kind of a long story, but maybe I
can share it sometime). I have not chosen surgery
yet, and I am reluctant to think that I will any time
soon. I guess that is why I don't fit with transsexual
or gay communities--I know that I didn't have a
choice in what my body looked like at birth. I have
never had surgery to change my gender, and I know that
if I am not OK with the body I have been born with,
I will never be OK having surgery to "fix" me.
<br>Some day, I may change my mind, but I dare say I will
make no moves in the surgery department until I can
come to grips with who I am with the body I have. I
would hope that others like myself wouldn't rush to
surgery just to "conform" to the public norm. Yes, that
means being misunderstood. Yes, that means that only my
closest friends will understand me. But, if I change
myself to only be a normal male, will I then find peace?
I doubt I would. So maybe, for now, I need to wait.

My name is Crysttal and I am born intersexed. I
was born in Georgia. I was raised as a male. From
early on I knew I was different. At age 22, (a year
ago), I started<br>hormone therapy. I found out when I
was 21<br>that I was indeed intersexed. I've
always<br>had "effeminate" features. I.e. high
voice,<br>womanly face, body, etc. The only thing "male about me
was my penis and unusually faster<br>than usual
growing facial hair. I too dont fit in <br>with the
transexuals or gay comunities. although I supportt them, We
as intersex people had absolutely no choice in what
we are. So Bridgette there is be tter help out t
here. I now live in San Francisco. Yes we still have
hate crimes but it is a lot safer than most places.
E-mail me and I will refer you here in<br>San Fran. to
get help, often for free. cristisphoto@....
This message is for any one intersexed or still
wondering.<br>TOGETHER WE STAND AND SURVIVE.

You bastard! We are not trophies looking for
exploitation! We are not pieces of meat just waiting for you
carnage. We have led a tough life...ridiculed, humiliated,
abused...and now, for me personally, at the age of 51 was told
by a psychotherapist recently he feels I am on the
way to self destruction. I learned at 49 that I am an
intersexual...and I have learned I am not alone. There are lots of
hurting people out there and then there is you. Talk
about despicable slime...what are you doing on this
site? Kick this bastard off!

Well, a couple of questions first:<br><br>How
close do you want this "fine person" to be to San
Francisco?<br><br>And, excuse me if I am cautious, what's your purpose
in wanting to meet someone? <br><br>I'm interested
in meeting people. . .just a little nervous when
someone sends a one-liner message. Why don't you
introduce yourself a little bit.

It isn't objectionable that you would like to
meet intersexed people. Frankly I wouldn't be offended
if you were hoping to find sex. But please don't
imagine that "few people" would accept or desire us
because that's not true. <br><br>You may be suprised to
find that a great many of us are not like women
though. Some of us are truly androgynous. Many are male
identified and have male secondary sex characteristics - we
look,smell and sound like any other guy. Many got a mixed
bag of hormones before they were able to settle on
the gender they most wanted to look like and so may
have breasts that go with a morning shave. If you'd
really like to get to know someone who is a little of
both, but not completely either gender you may find
that what we really are doesn't fit your imagination.

for your info we are looking for a long term
partner not a trophy.we think that intersexed people are
special.we are not being nasty and demeaning we just agreed
that we could show an intersexed woman that she is
really a human being not a joke atleast we can except an
intersexed woman not many people would.we just want to be
real and we are.we are not in here cracking jokes or
ridiculing we just want to meet an intersexed woman to be
friends with and maybe more.we respect people for who
they are not what they are.

wtptoo,<br><br>I think you are right about the
high incidence of intersexuals we see and hear about
being "females", because this is the standard of care,
(or lack thereof) in gender assignment surgery. I
look and function as male, although I too would like
to be able to identify myself as being not quite
like the other little boys. In my case there was no
question of reassignment surgery, as I had one palpable
testicle, so the only race that was run was to see where
the other testicle (or ovary) was in the body. My
hypospadias was left alone, too, thank god, so while I did
endure being opened up only to find nothing there, I did
not have to risk the high rate of failure in these
repair procedures. <br><br>To answer your question, the
incidence figure I hear is 1 in 2000 live births, which
makes intersexed people more common than those with
cystic fibrosis. <br><br>Doug

I'm new here. I'm 44 yrs old,5'5" bearded and
kinda hairy, gay-partnered, intersexed (micro-penis,
bi-fid scrotum w a short vagina - tiny opening. No
gonads) I'm slowly finding other intersexed people
online, but I have never actually knowingly met another
person like me face to face. I'd love to get a chat room
goin in here if anyone is interested. It doesn't seem
like there's been much action here in a while. I'm
friendly - ok to e-mail, jimdcs@... I'm a very
sexually free person. I'm currently re-educating for a CSW
and work part time for a Lesbian lawyer with mostly
GLBT clients. My biggest hobby is singing in the
Rochester Gay Mens Chorus and my partner Tim is the
accompanist.

hi looking to meet that fine person to meet

Hi Angel,<br><br>Have you thought about
contacting the "Men with AIS" group that the AIS Support
Group Australia run? The have several members that are
men with PAIS in the UK.<br><br>Check out
<a href=http://www.vicnet.net.au/~aissg
target=new>http://www.vicnet.net.au/~aissg</a><br><br>Good luck<br><br>Karen

If you allow me to talk to you please email me.
mveloso@...<br><br>I am looking for my soulmate and today, after 10
years i belive my perfect match is someone like
you.<br><br>Please observe i am not looking for sex, i know how
dificult is your life. I am being very
honest.<br><br>Marcio<br>PS. Please forgive my poor english, i am a brazilian
guy.

hi a 28 male pseudohermaprodite,with pais and
hypospadias, my life as for many intersexualls has been hell,
not knowing whether i was male/female, gay straight?
its been hard i tried living as a woman when 20 and
stopped my testosterone treatment, i found it hard as
socially i was just another transvestite allthough
convincing, despite felling depressed at times i am happy
with my ambigous genitalia,even being mutilated at
birth,after all its all ive got.,i just hope that some day i
will find someone to curl up into bed if not for
companionship,as ive not yet fond anyone who wants what ive got in
between my legs and thats sad, im sure that there are
more intersexualls in uk ,they just have to speak out,
i play a male role but would like to identify as an
intersexuall if society allowed me ,sorry ive gone on so long
.Angel

I've been out of town for few days. It would be very nice to talk.
<br>cheers<br>hg

Had a discussion with a friend who has
Klinefelters about percent of population which got me to
thinking. Anybody have any statistics on how many of us
exist? One thing I find peculiar is that 99.9% of posts
I see on various boards are from "men". From talk
shows & what little printed material I have run across,
I was under the impression most Intersexed lived as
"women" (mostly from doctors selecting their gender for
them). So I was wondering about those of you
indentifying as male, do you live within society as men, or
are you self-identifying yourself that way but your
co-workers know you as female?

Hey I tried instant messaging you. Thought it would be nice to talk if you feel
up to it.

I suppose the more things change, the more they
remain the same. A hundred years ago, victims of
Hansen's Disease (Leprosy) were shuttled off into isolated
communes, and in the early years of the AIDS epidemic there
were thoughts expressed by many along the lines of
establishing mandatory quarantines.<br><br>I am NOT attempting
to equate intersexuality with disease, so please
hold the protest mail, but I am saying that we have a
long climb ahead until public ignorance and the kinds
of nonsense that surrounds our issue is in the past,
if history is any teacher. <br><br>It seems to be up
to us to act as our own ambassadors in the world at
large, in order to effect change in the way
intersexuality is viewed.<br><br>Above all, maintain your own
dignity. We will eventually live in a world where we no
longer are seen as fetish oddities in porn, or subject
to unwanted medical abuse and
mutilation.<br><br>Doug

Well done. Thank you.<br>Your exact words (
mutilated by doctors, ridiculed) , reminded my of so many
hard nights, pain, grief, and hear brocken. It's
amazing how people think of us. We are not freaks.
<br>cheers

Well here's a response from an
intersexed<br>female... I'm insulted you as well as many, MANY
others<br>view us as trophies. Actually any time a
"couple"<br>wants multiple partners that 3rd person is a
trophy<br>whether they are male, female or somewhere in
between.<br>This board is intended to be a support group for
the<br>Intersexed. Maybe you should try one of the fetish
boards<br>since all you are looking for is sex.
&lt;br&gt;&lt;br&gt;It's bad<br>enough that we are ignored, ridiculed,
discriminated<br>against, sometimes mutilated by doctors, but now its
even<br>worse being the newest fad on the internet. Why
can't<br>we be viewed as people instead of objects?

I am still trying to understand why you think an
intersexed female on this forum would have any interest in
responding to your post. <br><br>Pardon me for sounding
critical, but I am immediately suspicious of anyone looking
to find sex partners with anatomical differences,
and can't help thinking of blatant exploitation at
the worst and self gratification at best.
<br><br>Those of us who are hypospadic have had our fair share
of people posting on our clubs looking for gay sex
with a hypospadian, and the thought that we are the
latest fetish rage in some circles is somewhat
demeaning, and the lack of understanding of the
phsychological issues that we go through is highly
insensitive.<br><br>By all means, don't let anything stop you from
pursuing your fantasies, but just be aware that there is a
flip side to the story. Although it is great that you
are so accepting of intersexuals, the truth is that
we are real people, not just bed trophies to land.

This is an insult to all of us in the intersex society. This is a support group,
not a pick up site.

We are a couple looking to meet an Intersexed
female to join us we are both into sex with men and
women so i figured why not an intersexed woman. Not
many people know i like to be with men that is why a
female intersex would be great. I have always wanted an
intersexed person i think they are lucky to get the best of
both worlds but i realize it is hard too. People just
don't realize that people are people no matter
sex,color, or relign. Hope to get to chat with some
intersexed people soon i support all of you.

I've been trying to respond to your post for
quite some time, and I'm finally doing so.<br>I
understand your pain, confusion, and frustration, and I
would like you to know that you're not alone.<br>I was
born with sever case of hypospadias. I'm 41 yo, and
unable to perform sexual intercourse. I do not even know
if I'm intersexed or not. To be honest with you, it
doesn't really matter, it's all so damn
confusing.<br>Well, I'm not going to say that it's ok , because I
know for fact that it's not. I've been down the same
road as you. My parents never talked to me about it. I
love them dearly. I think it was different times then,
and talking to your child about his ambiguous
genitalia was a forbidden thing to do. Oh well, so for
that, we had to know about our own misfortune the hard
way. Growing up was fun for me, but there were those
moments that will always be in our memories. the kids
from school, the humiliation when a woman looks at me
naked, the relationships that end in pain, and
heartache, and of course, the loneliness<br>I think all you
can do is take it one day at a time. I try not to
think about it, but whom am I kidding.. ?? I think
about it every day all the time. I understand, it's a
very hard thing to live with, specially in a society
like ours. I was asked the other day, how come I was
never married.. what's wrong with you..?? well, a lot,
but how could I ever reveal what's wrong with my
penis..?? it's not really a good subject for a conversation
with people who would never understand how we
feel.<br>I bury my self into work. I work about 85 - 90
hours weekly. I know, it's insane, too much, and
physically wrong, but, what else am I supposed to do..?? all
my friends are either married or with someone they
love, and in a relationship. I just realized that I'm
the only single person left , so, I got married to my
work. I'm very thankful that I love my job, it's the
only thing that keeps me sane.<br>I'm sorry if my
message sounds depressing to you. I did not meant it to
be that way. I'm only trying to show you that what
you're going through, is also happening to others around
you.<br>Try to laugh, it's a great cure for depression. Go
out, get busy, do stuff. Be happy.<br>Feel free to
messenger at any tome<br><br>cheers<br>hg