I know it's so hard not to get caught up in their sh--. While he is gone you
need to do what is in front of you and do the next right thing. You have a baby
to take care of, so you need to keep busy and find some activities you like. If
you keep focusing on yourself and try to read some encouraging readings, it will
help. Keep posting just to get your frusteration out. I've been where you are
and I know it doesn't feel very good. they all have a way of turning things
around to make it seem like it's your fault. I also can't stop from questioning
my husband about things even though I know it doesn't help. If you have a
meeting for yourself to go to, I think you will find lots of love and support.
Good luck, I'll be praying for you. Dana



----- Original Message ----
From: pupni <no_reply@yahoogroups.com>
To: gamanonsupportgroup@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Friday, August 1, 2008 10:20:38 PM
Subject: [GAMANON SUPPORT GROUP ] Re: Am I the bad one?


Thank you so very much for the support. I really appreciate your
advice.

--- In gamanonsupportgroup @yahoogroups. com, basket1952 <no_reply@.. .>
wrote:
>
> Let go of the problem. It isn't yours. He isn't going to GA
> meetings. You know that. He isn't working a program. He is an
> addict.
>
> Protect yourself. You are married to an addict and only you can
> protect yourself and your child. Only you can protect and support
> your child.
>
> Your husband either will or will not get better . . . it is totally
> up to him, not you. You have no control over him, never did, never
> will. He isn't working a program now. He is an addict. He isn't
> getting better.
>
> Focus upon yourself and fix what you need to fix about you. You
are
> married to an addict. If you plan to continue to be married to an
> addict, whether he is successfully working a program or not, you
will
> need help for yourself in this dynamic. Focus on you and get help
> for yourself. Let go of his problem. Work on you.
>
>
> --- In gamanonsupportgroup @yahoogroups. com, pupni <no_reply@>
> wrote:
> >
> > My husband's father is extremely ill and dying of cancer. He is
> the
> > hospital in Las Vegas. He is heading out to see his dad again
> today
> > and won't be back until Sunday, which is all fine. I totally get
> him
> > wanting to see his father. I just ofcourse get worried over the
> > Vegas thing. I told him I was worried he would end up in a
> casino.
> > He didn't respond. So I asked him very simply when he would be
> going
> > to a GA meeting again. He has not been in a few weeks. To which
> he
> > responded, "You are so fucking unbelievable. When my father is
not
> > dying, I will go to a fucking meeting." Then he left the room
> where
> > he was playing with our 16 month old child and told me to watch
> her.
> > I felt bad at first, but, now I feel so sick of his shit. The
> world
> > does not relvove around him. I understand his dad is dying. It
is
> > very sad for me too, I like his dad, his dad has been terific to
> me,
> > and it breaks my heart that our daughter will not grow up with
her
> > grandpa. But that has nothing to do with his PROBLEM. I feel
like
> > he gets to check out when ever he wants, go see his friends, do
> what
> > he needs to do all because his father is ill and this is so tough
> on
> > him. But what about me, I don't get to check out when ever I
just
> > feel like it, I have to take care of the baby. I really hate him
> for
> > all the tremendous stress the gambling and pot smoking addiction
> have
> > taken on me.
> >
>






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