Let go of the problem. It isn't yours. He isn't going to GA
meetings. You know that. He isn't working a program. He is an
addict.

Protect yourself. You are married to an addict and only you can
protect yourself and your child. Only you can protect and support
your child.

Your husband either will or will not get better . . . it is totally
up to him, not you. You have no control over him, never did, never
will. He isn't working a program now. He is an addict. He isn't
getting better.

Focus upon yourself and fix what you need to fix about you. You are
married to an addict. If you plan to continue to be married to an
addict, whether he is successfully working a program or not, you will
need help for yourself in this dynamic. Focus on you and get help
for yourself. Let go of his problem. Work on you.


--- In gamanonsupportgroup@yahoogroups.com, pupni <no_reply@...>
wrote:
>
> My husband's father is extremely ill and dying of cancer. He is
the
> hospital in Las Vegas. He is heading out to see his dad again
today
> and won't be back until Sunday, which is all fine. I totally get
him
> wanting to see his father. I just ofcourse get worried over the
> Vegas thing. I told him I was worried he would end up in a
casino.
> He didn't respond. So I asked him very simply when he would be
going
> to a GA meeting again. He has not been in a few weeks. To which
he
> responded, "You are so fucking unbelievable. When my father is not
> dying, I will go to a fucking meeting." Then he left the room
where
> he was playing with our 16 month old child and told me to watch
her.
> I felt bad at first, but, now I feel so sick of his shit. The
world
> does not relvove around him. I understand his dad is dying. It is
> very sad for me too, I like his dad, his dad has been terific to
me,
> and it breaks my heart that our daughter will not grow up with her
> grandpa. But that has nothing to do with his PROBLEM. I feel like
> he gets to check out when ever he wants, go see his friends, do
what
> he needs to do all because his father is ill and this is so tough
on
> him. But what about me, I don't get to check out when ever I just
> feel like it, I have to take care of the baby. I really hate him
for
> all the tremendous stress the gambling and pot smoking addiction
have
> taken on me.
>