--- On Thu, 2/19/09, Kathy Mackin <kathy0038mackin@...> wrote:


From: Kathy Mackin <kathy0038mackin@...>
Subject: [for-and-by-autistics] Re: Narcissitic personality disorder
To: for-and-by-autistics@yahoogroups.com
Date: Thursday, February 19, 2009, 11:20 AM






No NPD here. In fact I think I am the one the article was telling to
RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN!!!

I think there were 3 NPDs in my family. Mother, oldEST brother, and
sister'The Demon Queen' ... I dubbed her that because 'Demons' feed
off the pain & suffering of others and she made an art form out of
causing me pain & suffering, so much so that I rarely call her by her
given name, and ohhh how pissed she was when she found out that that
is the only way I refer to her anymore. None of our friends see that
the faces these 3 put out there are just facades; Mother, put on the
suffering altruisticly for her children face; oldEST brother put on
the intellectual snob, pompous ass face; Demon Queen put on the
social butterfly, party girl face ... and everyone we knew never
looked beyond what seemed to be.

Then there were father, oldER brother & myself ... Aspies & BPDs
undeniably. Our problems arose out of feeling TOO MUCH, which of
course allowed the other 3 to totally screw with our lives whenever
they wanted to.

Then there is little brother who somehow made it through this three
ring circus and come out normal. Don't know how, but he did.

Dad was died in 1980 before names were put to alot of these disorders
were brought out of the closet (so to speak) so I don't know if he
ever realized that things weren't right inside of him. OldER brother
died in '97, he had actually started going to group therapy (for
depression I think) and he didn't talk much about it, but I do know
that he had started to realize that things weren't right inside I
just don't know if he had ever actually been offically diagnosed with
any of these disorders. Myself, I have only recently (within the last
5 years) been diagnosed with a crap load of disorders and as much as
I hate 'labels' being put on me those labels have helped because I am
still here and learning how to deal with it all.

So, for me at least, looking at my family dynamics, NPD and AS seem
to be polar opposites.

kathy
redwood city, ca

----

Hi Kathy,
How about Reactive Attachment Disorder? It's approximately the same thing as
NPD in that the etiology is the same.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reactive_attachment_disorder

http://counsellingresource.com/ask-the-psychologist/2008/02/26/borderline-person\
ality-disorder-and-reactive-attachment-disorder/

http://attachinghearts.blogspot.com/2008/08/adult-rad.html

The big difference between RAD or Asperger's Syndrome and NPD is that NPD is
totally unflattering and therefore more likely to be diagnosed by psychoanalysts
rather than regular psychotherpists who would more likely diagnose RAD. But I
swear I can't tell the difference on the face of it. The big problem is that
psychoanalysts are inclined delve into the inner evil and see through the
posing.


Anyway, I have it all. The conditions are indistiguishable to me. I am not
proud of my evil impulses. In fact I am really ashamed of them, but I can't
deny them. Moreover, I don't think I'm much more horrible than other people.
Jesus said man is born in sin, and I assume that means everybody. What's more,
according to Freud all mental illness is just an exaggeration of normality.

The thing that interested me the most in the report was that business about
physical beauty in children with NPD. On the face of it, it makes sense
considering the name of the illness is "narcissistic personality disorder."
(When I was little I was really beautiful. People used to turn their heads and
gawk at me) Not only is this a condition that might make any child inclined to
turn inward (the word "autism" originally was "auto-erotism"), but the beauty is
a convenient comfort for a child, and therefore withdrawal into the self is not
such a dreadful option. http://www.paains.org.uk/articles/beautiful.htm

I think it's more than coincidental that this is common also in NPD.

Yours,
Larry