Hi,

Well it has not been a good few days. I have wanted off of the
effexor xr due to side effects but the doc wanted me to see all sorts
of specialists before he changed me. He also did not give me enough
refills to makeit to next appt. Well being the stong headed and
sometimes stupid person saw this as an oppertunity to stop the hated
effexor.

Well needless to say I crashed, not from the stopping but from the
witdrawl symptoms. I do not know which is worse the PTSD, ADD, and
Bi-polar or the withdrawl? I read up on effexor withdrawl and there
are some real horror stories out there. People have taken up to a
year to be weaned off of it and have gone so far as to count the
granules inside the capsules to take ever lower doses and still had
withdrawl lasting weeks after ending it.

I have not slept well at all nightmares, more like night terrors that
wake me in a sweat. Uncontrolled shaking and no appitite. The
flashbacks started ysterday and have been uncontrolable and
devistating.

I started back on the meds after 3 days and that was last Friday so
today is day 4 back on the meds and still no improvement at all. I do
not want to be around anyone, even family. I just started a new job
10 days ago and this is happening so I am also terrified of what is
going to happen.

I called off of work today in hopes that I can get a little sleep and
maybe just try and reset a bit. I just do not care anymore about
anything and I know that is very bad.

Jay