welcome to the family, sounds like you are on a good recovery path,
i cant say the flashbacks will ver go away, but they will get less
and less. i also suffer ptsd and depression, i was an EMT, i
founded this group for everyone in 911 response and the related
fields, so yes, you are in the right place. i hate to say hello and
run, but breakfast is on the stove! glad to meet you hope to chat
with you more.


--- In emsfirepoliceptsd@yahoogroups.com, "Jacqueline"
<oceandreamer73@y...> wrote:
> Hi my name is Jacqueline and I have PTSD and depression. Some of
the
> PTSD was from childhood abuse, but a lot of it was from my job.
I'm
> not exactly sure if I fit in your description. I wasn't an EMS,
or
> Fire responder. I was a deputy prosecutor in a small jurisdiction
> where the prosecutors were also the coroners. Any deaths outside
of
> the hospital or hospice had to be attended and all the autopsies
> witnessed. Being a woman I felt the need to show a tough front,
but
> some of the bloodier calls got me. Especially the deaths with
> children and auto accidents. Something about auto accidents
really
> got me. I also had a problem prepairing and trying child abuse
cases
> because they reminded me so much of my past. Finally, just in
case I
> don't have enough to flashback on, I had an accident one night
while
> I was driving home from a coroner call. The car I was driving got
> stuck in the snow on train tracks in a rural crossing and just
then a
> freight train came. I got out in time but the car was toast. It
> totally traumatized me. I couldn't sleep for weeks. And even now
> years later I still dream of trains and hear the sound of the
horn,
> screatching breaks, and crushing metal. It wasn't long after that
> that I got out of criminal law, moved to a bigger city, and got
into
> therapy. I've been in therapy for about 3 years and it's helped a
> lot. I don't flood with the flashbacks nearly as bad as I did.
I'm
> not sure if I'll ever shake it completely. I saw a lot of death
and
> trauma. It's hard because no-one understands. My friends think I
> had a cool job full of excitement. They don't understand how I'll
> see a little blond haired girl who will remind me of a victim and
> make it all flood back.
>
> Okay, that's enough for now. I look forward to getting to know
you
> all.