I would suggest leaving her at least until she gets
help your daughter must be afraid too! If she loves
and she will get help and you will protect your
daughter and yourself from the emotional abuse! You
deserve to be loved and treated with respect! I am
healing myself from a recent break up , talk is cheap
I know, its hard when you still love them, I love my
husband too! But the reality is your in a
relationship that is not healthy for any of you! You
are allowing your partner to get away with her
behavior and that does none of you nay good! I hope
you can find the strength and do some prayin gon this
to find your answere and go th edirection you are
intended!

Wishing you hope, love and faith!

--- mareyalea <linda.w@...> wrote:

> Hi there - I am a new member who has joined because
> I am in an
> emotionally abusive relationship. I am a woman, in
> a relationship
> with a woman (having previously been married for 17
> yrs) and am
> having great difficulty reconciling what is
> happening to me.
>
> Living with my partner is like living with Dr Jekyll
> and Mr Hyde. 50
> percent of the time she is beautiful, loving,
> caring, supportive, a
> wonderful step parent to my 12 year old,
> intelligent, talented, with
> a great sense of humour. However, the change in her
> happens so
> suddenly, and unpredictably, that it leaves me
> shaken and fearful -
> mainly because I am never ready for it when it
> happens. Although I
> should be, having noticed the pattern over the last
> 18 months we have
> been together.
>
> My partner also has an abuse background, but does
> not seem able to
> stop the behaviour pattern. I have an abusive
> background (a
> physicall and emotionally abusive father) and have
> made a long and
> valiant effort to avoid such relationships all my
> life and also
> learned not to perpetuate the behaviours onto
> others. Suddenly, at
> the age of 45, I find myself in the middle of one.
>
>
> My fear is that my partner is potentially
> self-destructive, and the
> knowledge that she has abused and hurt me sends her
> into a deep
> depression, usually for days. So I also end up
> being the one who
> comforts her as well at this time. I know she does
> not mean to hurt
> me, but hurt me she does. I am fearful, nervous,
> shaken, and afraid
> a lot of the time.
>
> When she loses her temper the triggers are usually
> small and
> therefore unavoidable. She swears, yells at times,
> throws and breaks
> things, and sometimes physically shoves me as well.
> I am at a loss
> and - although I don't want to lose her (sadly, I
> still love her
> deeply), I feel as though my choices are running
> out.
>
> Any support, advice, or knowledge of such things out
> there would be
> welcomed and appreciated.
>
> Thank you for your time and for reading this post.
> Yours,
> Mareya Lea
>
>


=====
Sue




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