Ellie-It is time for an update from me. I have continued to mentally
redirect and connect the "bad" feelings( includes any feelings of
becoming
small, vulnerable, feeling less than, feeling abandoned, alone, stupid
or
ugly-- to name a few of my common demons) as soon as I recognize their
presence--which is pretty much within seconds to minutes only. Since I
usually feel "small" around other people I do this mentally even in
meetings
at work. It levels out my low mood within minutes of doing it so that I
am
once again able to be in the present and pay attention to what is
happening
in the now. My lingering depression which lasted for almost a yr. is
pretty
much lifted. I still have feelings of inadequacy. Where they are due
to a
lack in education I am taking classes. When they are a result of old
messages and abuse I redirect as soon as they get my attn. It works!!
It
seems like such a simple thing now that I have gotten into the
"habit"--and I
am feeling so much better. the beating on the bed didn't work for me.
Instead i am in a cycling class with pumping, aggressive, outrageous
music
and as I am cycling like a madwoman I am imagining my strength at
decimating
my tormentors . It is very physical and I feel so released. Their
faces
appear less and less. As for the diet, I eat any and everything in
moderation and am curious if I will actually want to eat processed foods

less. My cravings seem to fluctuate more with my hormones than anything

else. I don't pray or believe in god. My best to you Ellie and your
wonderful messages. Love
Cindy

My opinion about God is that he/she doesn't need to us to believe in
him, he believes in us and IS us. In fact I think the Hindus were right
when they said of the big bang, that, 'God created matter out of
himself.' We are God. Thanks for the exercise tip. I hope this will be a
useful means for people in prisons. I find am not attracted to processed
food. In fact I recently made the mistake of trying some cheese made
from raw milk, and I'm now having detox symptoms, slight fever and
headaches. I find cooked and processed foods, and milk products toxic
for me.
Ellie



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