Received a letter asking more about the "sticky mind" that I referred to in
an earlier post. Sticky mind is a phrase I coined to describe and remind me
of how my own mind works. Some of us just have minds that hold onto things too
long. A famous Hindu sage said, "as miraculous as it is for us to be able to
think - it is even more miraculous for us to be able not to think. Another
fellow mentioned how we sometimes complain that we are forgetful, when the root
of
an addicts problems is that he remembers some things a littler too well and
needs to forget more. In my own case, I try to limit what goes into my head as
I have the tendency to latch onto things and these things can end up
disturbing me. For instance. I stayed late at a meeting one night until 10PM and
had my
sleep disturbed from late note conversations. If I type on the computer after
11AM with recovery oriented posts my sleep is disturbed. Even if I get off
the computer early but type too long it repeats in my head all night.
Consequently I use time clarity a lot with my computer work. If I go to concert
at
night the music repeats in my head all night. Problems and issues with other
persons disrupt my sleep as well as disrupt my days. My wife on the other had
listens to problems all day and well into the night (she is a workaholic
therapist)
and is able to release them almost immediately and fall asleep and stay
asleep all night.

As humans we are all diverse beings and have different limits and
capabilities and our success will not be in trying to copy others that have
natural
abilities that we want but we do not have. Our success will be in learning what
our
own comfortable abilities are and a living a balanced life within these
abilities. There are many more things that disrupt my peace, so I practice
renunciation of certain areas to live within boundaries to limit problems.
Numerical
clarity also helps with living within certain boundaries. Numerical clarity is
of the utmost importance for the addicts to learn to apply to their addictions
that must be participated in on a daily basis. Peace awareness is most
important as well - if we can be aware of what disturbs our peace we can work on
change or practice acceptance with the peace destroyer - but always try change
first and acceptance second. If you missed my earlier 6 page post on "Putting
Peace First" and want copy write me.

Here are 3 old posts on the related subjects of Voluntary Solitude, Sleep and
Depression and using Meditation within a 12 step program.


Voluntary Solitude

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..
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As an offshoot to my simple living work, I now use the practice of
"voluntary solitude" to give me a more peaceful life. The same way I pick and
choose
which complexities of living I allow in my life, I now do the same with noise
and commotion. I first learned of this concept when reading a book by the
granddaddy of backpacking Colin Fletcher. He described the benefits of pure
solitude
by walking alone. It occurred to me I was addicted to noise and commotion. I
felt like my mind was going to explode some days. Music and noise kept
repeating in my brain all night and my sleep was fitful. I had the TV blasting
all
day with the stock channel or the news or whatever. It didn't matter if I
watched it or not, I just liked the noise. I had the radio or CD going whenever
I
was driving. Even on the trail when hiking or biking, I had on earphones and
at the pool a radio blaring. My mind was full of noise and I could never seem
to get any escape with noise even in my sleep.

Once I started with voluntary solitude and shut off the noise, I went though
a period of noise withdrawal for a few days, but gradually could see things
were getting better. Sometimes our peace is disturbed by other means than noise.
I've seen persons going out to be alone in nature and they bring their
computer or paperwork with them. Maybe they have removed some of the fuel for
their
stressed life but cannot let go of it all and must still feed their addiction
even while in nature. Be aware of peace disrupters in your life, irrespective
of whether they make sounds or not. I now am very choosy when it comes to
noise pollution and other disruptions entering me that can be cured by using
solitude, deep quiet and renunciation. When we are quiet within we are in an
easier
position to find peace. I've known some people that have a completely quiet
day once per week seeking quiet for their mouth and speak to no one in addition
to seeking quiet for their ears. Other persons I have talked with just make
an effort to lower the volume of the noise they intake as well as lowering the
volume of the noise they output...lowering their voice. No matter which road
you choose, now is a wonderful time to seek the solitude of nature and
practice voluntary solitude in whatever degree you choose, as the crowds have
gone as
well as the distraction of annoying bugs and the leaves are blazing with
their rainbow of colors.


Stress, sleep and depression

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..
..

Sleep is a problem with me as well as many health related stress produced
problems. Simplifying my life and doing recovery work with my 12 step programs
and stress reduction has helped me greatly. My sleep has improved, but I have
to keep a watchful eye on my lifestyle as it can be back to problematic living
in short order. I found that my depression and stress sickness was greatly
helped when I started to work on repairing the wreckage of the past that was
constantly being fueled by my various addictions. From years of practicing these
addictions I had dug a deep hole for myself and my family. The bigger mess I
made, the more stress I created for myself and the more depression and
hopelessness arose from my wrong lifestyle. Once I started to restructure my
life in
the direction of recovery, the benefits started showing up at my door. One
thing was certain, I could not keep my old sick life and get better as well.
Something had to go.

Living an unbalanced life really contributed to my depression. Stress and
depression go hand in hand, then we get sick from the stress and the depression
and stress just gets worse and it becomes a death spiral. Meditation and
mindfulness helped me as well as my joining the simple living movement. Without
time for contemplative practices and relaxation I am sunk. This is an almost top
necessity for me. I tell those that say they have no time to relax to get into
voluntary simplicity. If you can't keep up, scale back until you can keep up.
I need to eat right and sleep right and exercise right as well. Many foods
help trigger crazy thinking and can lead to depression, especially the salty and
chemical rich, artificial factory foods. This is much easier to see once we
clean up our diet.

Besides nutrition and getting the proper vitamins I have to work in spiritual
areas as well. I need a balanced way to live right - not 100% spiritual and
not 100% physical, but need to blend the two seamlessly for proper recovery. 12
step work as well as personal religious and spiritual studies helped me in
this area. We are spiritual beings in a physical body living in a physical world
so we are governed by both spiritual as well as physical or natural laws. So,
we must never forget to work in both areas. In short, we have to live right
and not work against the natural laws as well as spiritual laws that govern us
if we want hopes for a new life.

I am lucky to be able to recover in these areas using natural methods. Other
persons suffering from depression might have a chemical imbalance in the brain
and need medical advice and special medications. If this is the case, it is a
matter of doing the footwork in all these medical areas to find out what can
be done. Depression can stem from many areas but once thing is for sure, If we
dedicate ourselves to work on getting better and making a better life for us
we can almost always improve our life in a positive direction and make
progress...but it takes work on our part to make these changes happen.


On Meditation

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Meditation can play a big part in the search for peace that all addicts
look for. I can get positive results with just 15 to 20 minutes a day sitting
meditation time. It helps if I sit at regular time. I meditate on nothingness,
although some meditate on an object. Nothingness helps quiet my "sticky brain"
that seems to hold onto everything. If you can get to a half hour meditation
time, that is great. It just takes time and practice. Morning works better for
me than mid day...there are less things distracting me earlier in the day
usually.

When I see a bright third eye forming in black space and my mind is empty, I
am there. I try to hold onto this place, but thoughts come and go and to hold
on forcibly makes it very elusive. Sometimes this light starts out as a small
spot and becomes brighter. A few time I have seen vivid pictures like movies
that made it seemed like my eyes where open. The important point is to just do
it and do it regularly and do not make demands on your meditation practice or
have expectations. Balance is very important in life. We need some spiritual
practice and some physical as well. We sometimes forget we are spiritual beings
residing in physical bodies living in physical world and need effort in both
areas.

There are many other ways to use meditation besides traditional sitting
meditation. There is also working mediation and walking mediation practices. If
you
do yoga, you can try combining meditation with your Yoga practice.
Mindfulness meditation all starts with being aware of ones breath as someone
mentioned
earlier. Some practitioners do compassion meditation throughout all their
waking hours if they are hard core.

"In every single gesture when getting up one thinks - may I get up to deliver
all sentient beings from suffering, when tying ones belt one thinks - may I
cultivate the belt of mindfulness, when coming down the steps - may I descend
to help take suffering from beings, when opening a door - may the door of
liberation be open for all sentient beings, when closing the door - may the door
of
suffering be closed for all sentient beings. In this way, every instance of
thought is filled with compassion."

Myself? I have done many years of working meditation and some walking
practice, but the compassion meditation is too much for me except in very short
bursts. Balance is the key for me. We should not look at meditation as a magic
bullet that will give us the power shoot lightning bolts from our finger tips.
As
the old Buddhist saying reminds us: Before enlightenment you chop wood and
carry water ~ after enlightenment you chop wood and carry water.

I also make use of meditation tools such as a meditation timer. One type is a
$10 CD that sounds a gong after a preset time. The other one is an expensive
$100 electric gong timer that can also be used as an alarm clock or Yoga
timer. Sometimes I might use the 15 minute preset time just to get into a state
conducive to meditation and when the gong goes off keep sitting until I feel
like
getting up naturally. These are usually the best sessions for me, although
they require a person to have some freedom of time. Seldom can I sit for longer
than 30 to 35 minutes at a session due to time and my ability.

Any sort of timer is fine except one that jars you out of meditation in an
abusive and agitating manner. A timer frees one's mind from worrying about such
things. This should also apply to our alarm clocks in the morning. I use a CD
clock that plays birds singing. Start your day off in peace. If you need
further advice, there are many good books, videos or tapes on meditating from
your
local library that can help. Also many internet resources.



Take Care,



V (Male)


For access to my earlier posts on voluntary simplicity, compulsive spending,
debting, compulsive overeating and clutter write: vfr44@.... Any opinion
expressed here is that of my own and is not the opinion, recommendation or
belief of any group or organization.


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