It is suggested that you get a sponsor to help you with things you cannot deal
with and it is \more personal than online.  If you go to Face to Face meetings
start looking for somebody that you can relate too and you feel comfortable
talking too. 
Hope this helps you with the Sponsor.
 
Wendy

--- On Thu, 1/22/09, noelle <nkathleen1980@...> wrote:

From: noelle <nkathleen1980@...>
Subject: Re: [chicago alanon] Newbie here with a ton of questions
To: chicagoalanon@yahoogroups.com
Received: Thursday, January 22, 2009, 3:53 PM






Hi, I am also brand new, and am in a similar situation with my husband. I didn't
know that Al-Anon members needed a sponsor too; could you let me know if you
gets answers about it?
 
Thanks

--- On Thu, 1/22/09, hawk lame <hawk00072@hotmail. com> wrote:

From: hawk lame <hawk00072@hotmail. com>
Subject: [chicago alanon] Newbie here with a ton of questions
To: chicagoalanon@ yahoogroups. com
Date: Thursday, January 22, 2009, 10:21 AM

hi
I just joined this group and thought I'd just jump right in and start asking
questions. First, I am hearing that I need a sponser, so how do i go about that?

And second, I am joining this group because my husband is an alcoholic and I
know now that I am just as sick as he is. Maybe even sicker as he at least knows
what his problem is, I really don't understand how come I've let it take me down
so far with him. I'm just realizing that I can't change who he is or what he is
doing to himself, but I can change how it affects me. I'm tired of being so
needy of him and his time and wishing for things that just aren't going to
happen. I have been living with the fantasy that I am his first love, and now I
know that isn't true. I come second, I always have, and more than likely it's
always going to be that way, especially if I don't start realizing that I am the
only one who can stop this cycle.
I guess that's the first step right? Admitting that I am powerless? I do admit
that, I know that for sure, so what is next, how do I go on from here and still
retain my self-respect? I understand that I have to have boundaries, but how do
I stick with them? I find myself moving the boundaries back further and further
at times, and I know I can't win this war if I do that. I'm just so scared that
if I finally draw the line and stick by it, then he will be forced to choose. I
dont' think I will like what his choice will be. I know with me ulitimatums make
me run the other way, so why would he be different, especially since the devil
seems to have him in his grip so completely.
I dont know how to get the courage to face this change that I know is coming. I
want to just stick my head in the ground and let it all flow past me,
unfortunately, I know I can't do that anymore.

So, any feedback would be nice and thanks for listening. Hawk

EMAILING FOR THE GREATER GOODJoin me

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