Hi Beginner and Welcome to Alanon
Know you are not alone....Your story seems to hit home with me too...
Father, siblings, (one dead), and ex husband......I always say that I
love alcoholics...it is true:)
As for meetings....in Florida the Libraries have a schedule ...and
also there is help line number in the phone book where someone will
call you back.
If you can't find a beginner meeting just go to a regular one...let
them know you are new...people will probably reach out to you and
just so much want to help you....Alanon is that way....let them help
you. Someday you can give back.
I was told when I first started Alanon to read the pamphlet on
Detachment. It is probably found easily at meetings. It helps you to
deal with your Alcoholic.
Alcoholics are not bad people. They are just drunks. They have an
illness. We have an illness from dealing with them our whole lives.
We can't get them better. We can just work on us. Get ourselves
better.
Alcoholics can be very manipulative. Of course so can we lol..
But you are not responsible for anyone's drinking. Let's say that
again...I am not responsible for anyone's behavior but my own.
And I cannot control anyone's behavior but my own.
Yes I have found Hope....and Yes I am getting better. You can too...
It happens slowly....there is a big learning curve...I remember one
day so long ago just crying when I realized just how sick I was ...
I had always thought it was just the alcholics who were sick....but
now I know how a lifetime of this affected me...but we can get
better....You are in a tough painful place right now....but you have
taken the first step...realizing something is not right....and
wanting to figure out why....Don't stop now....The rewards are
Beautiful for you....Keep Reaching Out....and as they say in
Alanon....Keep Coming Back....It Works if you Work It!
God Bless, (ok may your Higher Power be with you:)
susie


--- In chicagoalanon@yahoogroups.com, "lcd0703" <lcd0703@y...> wrote:
> Hello, all. Does anyone have info on where to go in Near North
> suburbs for good beginner meeting and how to find when they hold
one?
> Tried on line directory but they don't list beginner mtgs. This
> seems a good alternative but does participation drop off in
summer?
> The postings seem light lately. Never knew there are 12 steps for
> the partner of the alcoholic and hope to gain strength in coping
with
> a binge drinker of 20 yrs. Like many, I suspect, he's a good guy
> when sober, employment has not suffered, no legal trouble, just
can't
> control the binges every couple of months. A few weeks of
moderate,
> secret drinking leads up to the binge where he now leaves the house
> for a weekend, stays in a flea-bag hotel, apologizes minimally and
> returns home. He claims he does this to get back at me. He claims
I
> argue all the time. I'm a bit indecisive and need to think (&re-
> think) many decisions and I see it as thinking to reach the best
> answer, not arguing. He also says I'm controlling and suspicious.
> Isn't that a natural reaction when you've had reason to? I've
> covered up from our 13 yr old daughter until last time but now told
> her the truth. She knew he's an alchoholic but I always covered
when
> he left or was sleeping one off making excuses. He says if our
> marriage was better, he wouldn't drink and I say if he didn't drink
> our marriage would be better. There's so much resentment in me
that
> built from over the last 15 yrs, I don't know if I can see my way
> out. He's agreed to try counseling an AA (again) but deep down I
> think he really wants out of the marriage & is just going thru the
> counseling motions. Alcholism is all around me. My Dad died 2 yrs
> ago from alcoholic renal failure, 2 brothers, and husband. I'd
love
> to hear from anyone. Thanks and I hope you're all finding hope as
> well since we're all here for similar reasons!