so sad, but so true...unfortunately...


--- In borderlinecreativity@yahoogroups.com, Misty Dixon
<sugar21880@y...> wrote:
>
> Goals Unreachable
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> I wish to get a good job and make money,
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> I've never kept a job more than a few months & I always just
disappoint everybody.
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> I aspire to go to school, get a degree, & a good career,
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> It seems so hopeless & I'll by no means meet this dream of mine, I
completely fear.
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> I desire to get married, have kids, & more pets some day,
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> But I can't even take care of myself, let alone other people, & I
know this will on no account come my way.
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> I long to make myself , my attitudes, & my behaviors better,
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> The harder I try to do things right, the worse & more unstable I
seem to become; nothing I seem to do anymore seems to matter.
>
>
>
> With these disorders I have – my emotions uncontrollable, my
feelings always in the way, the dark depression, the guilt, the hurt,
& the way I can't function in society,
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> They all make me feel like I should claim mental disability.
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> These goals I write & want to achieve regardless of what it takes,
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> Although I feel as if I'm stuck in a huge rut I'll in no way get out
of; a nightmare of mental disabilities from which I'll never wake.
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>
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> I've tried so many times throughout the years to make myself better
& do the things that are right and prove that I can do something else
besides cry, mope, be depressed, and shit,
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> I know with these disorders & my pathetic personality, the harder I
try, the further away I am to ever being able to function normally and
make it.
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>
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> So here are my goals however unreachable despite how hard I try,
>
> So I guess I'll do what I do best; try to ignore my problems, let my
feelings & emotions overwhelm me, try to avoid this along with the
pain, hurt, guilt, confusion, & sadness even though itdoes not work;
light a cigarette, sit, and cry.
>
>
>
> Written By: Misty M. Dixon
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> Written On: 01/10/2003 12:58a.m.
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> ---------------------------------
> Do you Yahoo!?
> The all-new My Yahoo! – What will yours do?
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]