Linda,
I'm sorry about your husband. you asked if there is light? yea there
is, but it takes a lot of time to see it. of course its different
for everyone, but just know that there is a light there. some days
will be easier then others and eventually the easier days come more
and more often. Holidays are never easy, neither are birthdays,
anniversaries, or any date with significant meaning. just know that
you arent alone. all of us have the same horror stories and we've
all made it.

ah, the same therapist story a lot of us have had. I finally found
one that deals with teenagers only. he is also well versed in AeA
addiction. he was a god send!!

take it one day at a time, your going to make it and so are your
children.
Carol


--- In
autoeroticasphyxiationsupport@yahoogroups.com, "philipp.linda"
<philipp.linda@...> wrote:
>
> I received a promotion at work left Thursday morning for a Plant
> tour, I kissed my husband and soulmate of 22 years goodbye and see
> you tomorrow...to get things ready for my Labor Day/and my
Birthday
> party.
> All was well, spoke to him on the phone twice and he told me he
loved
> me and would see me Friday. Friday, at breakfast and my oldest
son
> (21) called my cell and was screaming to get my ass home Dad had
> killed himself. I was is shock ...not my husband, after several
> frantic calls to nieghbors and relatives I found out it was
> true...but it wasn't suicide but AeA. I have 2 sons 21 and 15. The
21
> discovered his body and told the yougest to stay out, but he
didn't
> and now the last image of their father is one NO-ONE should have
> seen, let alone their dad.
> After the horrible shock, pulling over and to let me throw up 3
hour
> ride back home, I arrived to see all family around. The boys who
ran
> to me and asked why?? How does one respond to something she does
not
> understand. I am fighting to save the remaining 3 of us, but some
> days I think what is the point...I miss him so very,very much and
how
> can I go on and live a life again? We met young, married young and
> built our lives together. I feel like we were a twisted baked
pretzel
> and now I need to know how to unwind myself from my other half
> without breaking.
>
> We are all on anti depressants and are seeing therapists and
> Phycs. ...but they haven't had much help, one called my husband
> mentally ill, one called it suicide...I found new therapists but
for
> now it seems we still are reliving 8/31/07. Over and over again.
We
> survived Christmas but there was no joy, just sorrow. Our 23
Wedding
> anniversary was pure hell and I am running out of energy and just
> want to curl up and forget the world exists...Please tell me that
> there is light at the end of the tunnel, for I see nothing but
> blackness.
>