Hi landonpaul02. You are not alone, even though you feel that way! I
have lost two sons to anencephaly, so I understand what you're going
through. I felt betrayed by God as well, and especially let down by
my "support system." Our society doesn't know how to deal with
grief, especially when someone grieving for her child. Many people
think you should just be able to pick yourself up by your bootstraps
and get better. It didn't work that way for me, either.

In my experience, the ONLY people I could talk to and really, really
relate were people who've lost children to anencephaly. It's sad,
but that's my reality. No one else can understand the magnitude of
losing a child in such a heartbreaking way. If you need to reach out
to someone who you feel really understands, continue to reach out to
the people on this forum. They really do get it.

I know you must be nervous. I am sorry that you'll never have that
blissful ignorance that lots of other women get to have when they're
pregnant. I feel for you. This is my fourth pregnancy, and even
though I'm 27 weeks, I still have not fully bonded with my baby
because I'm scared something will happen. Not until I hold him in my
arms....

I also have a healthy son -- my third pregnancy. I say that to show
you that there is definitely life after anencephaly.

I hope and believe you will come out of the grief on the other side.
Try to stay positive! We are all pulling for you!

Erin