I see your point.  But the thing is, if your child is allergic to so many foods, or at least enough of the popular lunch foods, I think you have to be very vigilant even if you think fewer kids are eating allergic foods.  By the way, the Jewish schools I know of would have meat on some days.  In my experience, the schools sends out a lunch calendar in advance so that you know when they are serving meat and when they are serving dairy.

One thing I was grateful for at my older son's school: since they don't have school lunch, everyone brings their own lunch, so that my son isn't the only one bringing lunch from home, so that's one less thing he's different about.  But I think you have to be careful not to let the cart go before the horse, to coin a phrase.  I mean, investigate the school and make sure it's right for your kid overall, right? and then see how (and whether) you can make the lunch situation work.

and by the way, you're concerned that your worries are so great that you aren't being as logical as you could be, and it's great that you are self aware enough to realize that you might go overboard so you'll know to rein yourself in - but be easier on yourself.  You're talking about life-threatening allergies, right? So your caution is commendable.  You have to know that whatever situation you put your child in, she will be protected from allergic reactions but will also be able to socialize properly with the other kids, and it's not an easy line to walk, but she's your kid and you are her absolute defense and advocate.  Just always remember, many other people have dealt with this and are dealing with this so you should always figure that, odds are, there is some way of making the situation work. 

-----Original Message-----
From: Abra
Sent: Feb 15, 2009 7:20 PM
To: allergicjews@yahoogroups.com
Subject: [allergicjews] Re: Jewish Day School

Sharon, you made me laugh.

"by the way, why would you think the food in a non-Jewish school would
be any safer? what kid, Jewish or not, isn't going to be eating mac
and cheese, peanut butter, etc."

I suppose my fear about a Jewish day school would be that each and
every single kid would be eating something that was dangerous to my
daughter. They eat no meat. I suppose every lunch would be: pb&j,
tuna sandwich, egg salad sandwich, cheese sandwich. At least in a
non-kosher school someone is going to be having a turkey sandwich or
hamburger that wouldn't have me sweating with worry :)

Does that make any sense? With worries like mine, I am sure I'm often
without any logic.