Hello,

Well I am at my wits end,,,don't know what to do anymore, or where to turn. I rarely have days or weeks like this,,,but being this group helps with depression,,anxiety etc,,,I have them all and could use some help.

I know that I am alone way too much,,,friends have come and gone out of my life,,big time in the past few years. Have tried to make new friends and it is all turning up to be nothing but more distress for me,,as I am a very caring person,,will do anything within my limits and power to be a good friend. I have always been there for those that I have loved and befriended. Now my family all but one has turned against me, and even the one left can't be trusted,,,,the rest of my family does not want to have anything to do with me unless they have a problem or need me to loan them money or something. My so called friends well they are about in the same boat I am in......

I am not willing at this time to try antidepressants am very sensitive to meds,,,and do not want to deal with the added side affects that they cause...my counselor is just like the rest of them,,,as long as you are paying them they seem to care,,other then that if you don't make an appt not like they call to see how you are doing....so am not into going to a counselor right now, the last time I spoke to him, I said I was ready to commit myself to a mental place here, he said well if that is what you feel you need to do...then do it.  Have had my share and given enough of my money to them.

I realize that I am alone way too much, a night and daymare for anyone with anxiety/panic/PTSD etc,,,my hubby is suffering on the job with attitudes,,and with the pain he has to live with in his body,,,,and I know and have been told so many times that it is all in the way we think or react to situations around us,,,to think that it could be worse,,,no thanks I don't need to think of how it can be worse,,,we have lost loved ones this year to death,,,another that is dealing with cancer ,,,and I won't go into all the rest.....

I am thankful that I don't have to go out and work everyday as I know that finances are a major issue with so many. But the saying goes you can't buy happiness with money,,nor can you buy your health,,well I will add to that you can not buy your sanity either.

If anyone has been where I am,,,lonely,,,fed up etc,,please feel free to email me,,,I don't even want to call any of my "so called" friends here,,being when I do all they do is dump on me with their problems,,so I would rather go to a group like this,,,that has possibly been where I am,,,and not knowing where to turn to,,,

There are no support groups here in my area for anxiety etc,,,,,,so all I have at this point is groups online and God,,,,,

Thanks for letting me vent,,,if you don't want to bother the boards with this just email me personally,,,,,

Take Care and Hope Your day is blessed~

Seagull

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