First of all I want to thank all who e-mailed me with support. I am so
sorry I did not write back. Life has been a real challenge lately. I
barely touch the computer lately.

Thursday night (the day after I got out of the hospital) I had to call 911
for my baby Paige. She threw up and it got stuck in her nose. She could
not breathe and passed out. I was so horrified. I temporarily forgot about
myself and all my postpartum depression and panic attacks. It was all about
her. My motherly instincts are kicking in. We rode in the ambulance and
they gave her oxygen and suctioned her out. She was okay by the time we got
to the hospital. She was monitered for awhile and then released. I now add
cereal to her formula. Keep her upright after a feeding and am more
diligent about getting a burp. She seems to be perfect now. I seem to be
bonding more with her now.

I am still having a hard time. It seems to get a little better and then
gets tough again. I have had my zoloft increased to 75 mg and I have been
on it for two weeks. I am a bit better so maybe things will be up from
here. My dad has been spending the night lately while my fiance is at work.
Just so I am not alone until I feel stronger. I went to church and they
are supporting me too. I am struggling big time. I am so exhausted and I
feel like crap most of the day and night. But I am pushing on for my
daughter's sake and my own.

Love Christine
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