Hi, Jerry,
what you say makes a lot of sense especially to someone like me who lost her
twin so early. Thank you very much for posting.
I sometimes tend to think that when lilfe after birth takes over, the mind gets
in charge and we are flooded with sensual experiences we forget things we
experienced in the womb. Similar, maybe, to the fact that unborn infants can do
things, e.g. suck their toes, it takes them months to "re-learn" after birth or
that the taste buds on the tongue diminish after birth. And if twins grow up
very close to one another the imprtance of THIS life must be overwhelming since
it is such a special and precious and singular way of life.
To me who only has these pre-birth experiences to rely on it is a mixture of
envy, sadness and elation. True, I do miss much if not all of a "real" twinship.
But true also, I still feel the tug of the womb-bond in full measure. The
reality of my twinship, the reality of my twin is not thrown into the blessings
AND the curses of real life. TRue, I will never be able to tell childhood
memories of me and my twin, I will never hear her voice and I will never touch
her body (again). And at times this all but breaks my heart. But true also, I
will never have to endure this searing pain of the fatal phone-call "we found
your sister ...", I will never have to go back again and again to that heart
wrenching memory of the moment I saw her dead. It is to have and have not at the
same time, to always have lost and to never can loose because everything that
"normally" stretches through a time of months, years, decades was rolled into a
couple of months at the very beginning. And so it stains the whole of my
existence: this loss at the very beginning.
I read an article in a major newspaper yesterday about the effects a birth by
c-s can have on a babie's DNA. It seems that research shows that experiences,
especially stressful ones, can affect a person's DNA. I didn't know that
psychosomatic goes that far but it doesn't surprise me. What we ARE can't be
reduced to our limited concepts of body, mind and soul. There is so much we
don't know yet and still are it without knowing and comprehending. It's not so
very long ago people thought nothing could harm the fetus in the womb, it was
safe and snuggly in there. Today we know that drugs, alcohol, medication and
hormones from the mother can harm the baby. It may still be some time until we
realize that the baby receiving this harm is not a passive matter receiving an
imprint but a living individual responding to it, too. We already do know that
babies aren't born a blank blackboard waiting for us to write upon, that they
react differently to outward conditions and u/s is showing us every day that
there's still a lot for us to learn.
As for me, my twinship is in every cell since I was MADE a twin, and so is the
loss of my twin. To live out of the equally painful and blissful combination of
these events which make my uniqueness seems to me to be the duty of my life. Who
said life is easy, who said life is fair?

Twin-LOve,

Angela TT


> -----Ursprüngliche Nachricht-----
> Von: "Dr. Jerry WineBrenner" <tkbk831@...>
> Gesendet: 08.07.09 15:21:00
> An: TwinlessTwinsSupportGroup@yahoogroups.com
> Betreff: [TwinlessTwinsSupportGroup] Wombmate loss


> Hi Group,
> I've watched and read the different postings aboiut womb mate loss
> and the mates not being real twins because they never lived.
> I learned that when the seed and the egg match up and begin to divide
> and form our bodies that it takes energy to create that activity.
> If you cut your finger today it will trigger a healinng, growing
> process, to replace the lost materials to restore the finnger. That
> process is the same as the original process of forming the body we
> all live in.
> We are all in a constant state of repair and growth. Our spirit, the
> energy that enervates this body from conception is the same spirit we
> have throughout our life nomatter how long or short it is. Living
> long enough to take a breath is not the deciding factor of life.
> Conception is. Our spirit took on the newly forming body and provided
> the power, energy, to grow and become each of us. I bet there isn't a
> mother here that has had twins or multiples that couldn't tell which
> baby was which, before they took their first breath. The bond and
> life of each baby, from the beginnning, has had different characteristi
> cs and qualities that mom's can detect.
> For another person who has never had twins or been a twin or multiple
> it is wrong for them to say that the loss isn't real because they
> were never alive.
> Our spirit, our individuality, is very much a part of the creation of
> our bodies. Emotions trigger different chromasomes and genes which
> triggers a slight difference in many aspects of a twin over the other.
> We have the same building material and blueprint but all that makes
> us different is how our building process was effected by those things
> you don't see. Our spirit, emotions and all that leads to our
> uniqueness. Just as it takes nine months to buuild the physical body
> let us not forget all that goes into building our different
> characteristics and qualities.
> I am saddened that so many do not understand that life begins with
> conception and then choose to berate others who do not share in their
> ignorance of life.
> Bonding with our bodies and then each other while in the womb is not
> just a physical activity. It is a spiritual, loving, activity. Loss
> at any time during this process is traumatic to the "One left behind."
> A body does not have enervation when the spirit leaves it. That is
> the physical death. Seperation of body and spirit. We all seem to
> understand that process and yet so many fail to understand that the
> beginninng process of conception and the joining of the spirit to the
> body are simultanious and what makes our earthly existance possible.
> Our growing as a spiritual being takes place as our spirit resides in
> our body. That is another growing process we all experience. Then our
> spirit leaves this body and returns to a spiritual existance. I guess
> I will know more of that when I have leave this life.
>
> Hope this makes since, I ramble sometimes.
> jerry tt gerry
>
>


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