I'm interested in how you guys get feedback from people as to whether you're doing ok in a social situation. I'm unsure of how to go about doing this, or how...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 2, 2007 8:33 pm
728
Well, this isn't exactly the place to get normal feedback, being a forum of shy people. You're in Michigan, right? I'm no where near enough to hang out. Or...
By the way, you're not alone in talking to things like trash cans. At least have some sort of legitimate-sounding excuse!. I've intentionally introduced ...
Hi Sam, Like a lot of us it sounds like you might be a bit over sensitive to feedback. God knows i am I'm constantly evaluating the feedback I receive from...
In the words of Benjamin Franklin: "Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing." ... From: Bob Mayo To: SocialFitnessForum@yahoogroups.com Sent:...
I just think that sometimes I tend to go overboard, and this sometimes scares people away. Of course being on this forum it might be that I offend other...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 4, 2007 12:32 pm
733
That made me smile. :-) I actually have something which relates to this and could work to improve confidence in these social situations. My brother and I...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 4, 2007 12:38 pm
734
I totally aggree with this. I think that a lot of times we perceive people to be rejecting us when this really isn't the case. I would hope that I give good...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 4, 2007 12:45 pm
735
The famous psychologist Albert Ellis had "shame attacking exercises" like this. He would do stupid things, like lay down on a sidewalk. When people would ask ...
I'm trying to illustrate going outside of something normal and into a social situation which would contradict what some shy people might think. For example if...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 4, 2007 9:31 pm
737
What you say makes sense to me. I've also heard it used in relation to rejection. For instance, you can ask people for something crazy that is likely to...
I guess one of the problems with email and forums is that sometimes they are not the best mechanism to receive feedback or even judge what a person might be...
I think that feedback is important, however just as important is how we process this internally; here I go again with the long-winded... :-) I think that all...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 5, 2007 11:25 am
740
It certainly sounds like your doing pretty well i think the more comfortable you are at sharing in front of people the more people will share with you.I kind...
I know what you mean about that. I used to be very peranoid about people thinking bad of me; i would say that in fact this boarder lined on psychosis. At one...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 6, 2007 5:19 pm
742
Yeh the most frustrating thing i find is not being in control of whats happening with my body. Even if i have no thoughts in my head that i should be nervous...
Although I think I know quite a bit about how we work in terms of creating things (whether it's the shakes or any other experience we have) I am far from an...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 7, 2007 1:54 pm
744
The problem in my conscious mind nothing is really happening i think it comes from the unconscious part of my mind. Underlying this is fear so my body is...
Hey all, I was wondering what people's thought are on making conversation. I have asked questions about this before, but they have been hidden in other...
I think that the harder we look for the way out, the more tied up in gnots we become. It's as if you have molasses on one hand, and a bunch of feathers in the...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 9, 2007 9:33 pm
747
I was really excited to read your email. I often talk about becoming aware of how to do certain things, and it looks like you're doing a fantastic job. I can...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 9, 2007 9:42 pm
748
Hey there everybody, my name's Simon and I recently found this group while searching for some advice on dealing with shyness online. I'm currently going to...
I'm glad to see your join our group here. I think that the more people we can get to join, the more we can learn from each other. Instead of you writing in...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 10, 2007 2:59 pm
750
Thanks for the warm welcome Sam! I've been wanting to try and relate my experiences with others so that I can help someone else out and vice versa....
I am attending Western Michigan right now, so I know all about the university life and how challenging it can be to meet new people. On one hand, there are so...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 11, 2007 3:13 pm
753
I'm sorry; I didn't quite get this one. Why is smiling tooo much a bit kreepy? What's too much, anyway? I once had a huge grin on my face and my friend Matt...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Sep 24, 2007 5:18 pm
754
... wrote: Okay...so I think we've all just COMPLETELY missed the point! I was looking for tips on making conversation or keeping them going. Maybe I confused...
I do have experience with meditation. I've been using a program called Holosync for about four years. It allows unskilled meditators to slip into deep...
I like your idea of the "I" perspective. There's an infinite amount of conversational material available there, but I sometimes have to remind myself that my...
I also have on of the internal map of reality expander series - the conscious filter builder. I thought it was really interesting, but I can't say I've been...
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