unfortunately the problem I'm confronting isn't shyness, or my unwillingness or inability to face people, but their insistent determination not to accept me in...
I'm kind of curious about this message. It sounds as if you're experience has been that people are unwilling to accept you dispite all your efforts, yet you...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 2, 2006 4:39 am
452
Well, since the world won't change and the world is, presumably, accepting other people, it must be something about you. And it can't be something about your...
that's a very simplistic and callous attitude, but even if it's true the simple fact is if I have to sacrifice myself to be accepted it's just not worth it to...
Bob thank you so much. I also had Allan's problem but didn't know how to make people accept me. One thing i found out is that I really don't care to know what ...
exactly. There is no reason. Which is the dilemma. If there was something wrong with me I could fix it, but since there isn't there seems no solution, or if...
It sounds, from this message, that you are perhaps unaccepting of others, and further still that you may be unaccepting of the fact that people may be willing...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 2, 2006 10:57 pm
457
I suppose that my major problem is that I used to be able to "play the game" and fit in with people, but over time I find it harder and harder to do it. This...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 2, 2006 11:14 pm
458
I can understand your bitterness -- sometimes life just doesn't seem fair. But I think people take this "just be yourself" stuff too far. It's a disease. In...
damned if I know. Personally I think I'm pretty wonderful, and I'd do anything for my friends when I'm allowed to have them. Sam Rau <sam.rau@...> wrote:...
near as I can figure other people don't want my acceptance. i had friends I went and did things with in college, but since then I've only known people at work....
Hmmm, I'd say we have some similarities, except I'm more optimistic. But I'm not as articulate as you in writing about my background. I don't think I'll be...
Amen; I couldn't have said it better myself. :-) I find that this is easier said than done, though, and I wish there was a way for me to "just do it". I find...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 3, 2006 1:11 pm
463
Like I said I used to be able to participate in the game, but I now find it difficult. I think that this has to do with people's acceptance of anything in...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 3, 2006 1:21 pm
464
Reading through it sounded a lot like myself. I know I am a good person. I think people should like me for who I am because Ive seen how much people act like...
Among other things I a problem with thinking that people dont want to talk to me. If I am talking with just one other person then I know they want to talk to...
Hi, I just joined this group and have a question to ask. I've always been shy and its hard for me to meet new people most of the time, but I have managed well...
Hey Ashes! are you talking about smalltalk conversations. like general BSing? From what i understand, being an ass is ok. For example if someone has...
Welcome! In addition to what people here suggest I recommend the book "Reaching Out" by David W. Johnson. It has good ideas and exercises for deepening...
I don't think that there's any problem with talking to anyone, but I think my problem is that I feel the need to talk to everyone and then come up with reasons...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 5, 2006 10:33 pm
473
Please read this till the end and, even though it may seem corney or like pop psychology, I believe that it makes sense. As always, I appreciate feedback. ......
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 5, 2006 10:53 pm
474
Nah, there's probably no reason to think that people here might not like you. Thinking that is just the nature of being shy or whatever. Personally, I was...
I think that's a good idea. I've been wanting a place to learn to get better at that kind of thing, and it would be good if like-minded people (especially...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 6, 2006 2:04 am
476
it doesn't seem corny, it just seems wishful thinking. You can't influence what people think and feel. That's called brainwashing. They either like you or they...
I really appreciate that; I'm glad that people are listening and that perhaps I can offer something. I think that everyone's contributions here are valid and...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 6, 2006 2:17 am
478
First off let me say that I'm glad to hear your feedback. Honesty isn't something that a lot of people want to hear, which I've said before, but it's just as...
Sam Rau
sam.rau@...
Jul 6, 2006 2:40 am
479
yes, I think so. I believe in the power of positive thinking, too, with one exception. You can't control other people. Or maybe you can and I just don't want...
I don't know if it's about controling anyone else so that they will like you, but instead controling your actions to "fit in". I used to be able to do this; I...
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