Hi, this is my first time posting here. I've read through a couple of
posts, and this looks like a good group. Everyone seems very supportive.

My question is: How do does a person improve his or her social skills?
People always tell me, "Oh just talk." As if just saying anything
would be enough and that I'd get better with practice. Well, when I
try that approach, most people don't like talking to me. For example,
when I started at a restaurant job in college, I was determined not to
be known as the "quiet girl." I spoke up, and people just flat out
dismissed me. Not one person at that job liked me.

Also, I have a hard time creating meaningful conversations and finding
connections with new people. I'll make small talk, but nothing
progresses from there--the conversation ends with an awkward silence
and that's it. On the other hand, when I listen to my friends when
they meet a new person, they'll chitchat for a few seconds and then
come up with some brilliant observation or shared interest that will
jump start an interesting conversation. The other thing is--my
friends even make their small talk sound interesting!

I feel like maybe in the past I've been trying to take huge leaps of
improvement before I was ready--like I'm missing some pieces of the
puzzle. Thank you for reading this looong post, and any advice you
have is greatly appreciated.