Hey, this is really good advice. Thank you so much! I have a meeting
in a few hours time so I can try this out.

cheers!
Sarah

--- In SocialFitnessForum@yahoogroups.com, Box <box-yg@l...> wrote:
> Yup, in my experience trying to suppress thoughts just entrenches
them.
>
> There's a lesson to be learned from great speakers. Great
speakers talk to
> audiences one person at a time. They focus on one person in the
audience and
> pretend they are the only other person in the room. They do this
for 5 to 60
> seconds, and then pick another person. This works even if there
are 1,000
> people in the audience.
>
> This works even if you are in the audience of a meeting. When you
are in a
> group meeting, I suggest you pick out one person, such as the
person currently
> speaking, and pretend they are the only person in the room.
Instead of trying
> to supress your anxiety or shyness, ask yourself some questions
about the other
> person. Do they believe what they are saying? Do they seem
honest? Do their
> ideas make sense? What did they have for breakfast? :-) Anything
is fine, as
> long as it is related to them, not you. You can move your focus
to another
> person in the room any time you like, but again pretend you are
alone with that
> one person and put the focus on them.
>
> Let us know how it turns out!
>
> --Box
>
> --- sarah_james999 <sarah_james999@y...> wrote:
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> I just thought I'd write to say that I've spent quite a lot of
today
> reading through lots of the past messages here (when I should have
> been working!) and I have learnt a lot of useful stuff about
getting
> over shyness -- such as the importance of focusing on the other
> person (and the external world in general) rather than looking
> inwards. Maybe this is (at least part of) the key to controlling
my
> disturbing thoughts. It's true they are always about me! (Not
> exactly sure how I can put this into practice though... still,
it's
> something to think about).
>
> I read on another website that attempting to suppress thoughts
about
> a particular thing can actually make them happen more often! Is
this
> true in people's experience, and if so, how on earth can I avoid
> these thoughts without deliberating attempting to surpress them??
>
> Oh well!
> BTW, when I am feeling shy, I also sometimes have really violent
> thoughts about my own death - being shot in the head, buried alive
> etc etc - I don't know why because I am pretty normal in most
other
> ways. Does anyone else have this experience?
>
> Thanks! Do you know, this list has made me feel better, just by
> reading it.
>
>
>
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