From: Lesa Showalter <lshowalter@...>
Subject: Re: [Recovery-World-Al-Anon] alcoholics and addicts as psychic vampires?
To: Recovery-World-Al-Anon@yahoogroups.com
Date: Saturday, August 15, 2009, 8:27 AM

 

Sara, that is the absolute truth.  I had been a zombie for years to my husband and that description absolutely was my life.  I am going to buy that book.   It's been three weeks today and I am doing so good.  I believe he actually realizes that it's over for us and has accepted it.  He did make a dr. appt for Monday to see what he needs to do to withdraw from alcohol.  So that's a start at least.    I have never been happier.  I am loving living life for me.  I am no longer his zombie.  I will never go back to a life like that.  I don't want another man ever.  It's too good just living with me and my dogs.  I don't miss him at all and that is sad.  That i let myself live in misery and dread for 23 years when all along I did not have to live that way.    Without meeting you all thru Al-Anon I don't think I would ever have done it.  There are so many out there living a life of misery because of addicts.  We know it is a disease and real and it is hard to give it up.  But unless they want to be sober, it will never happen.  I don't believe my husband wants to be sober.  But my decision to have a sober life is wonderful.  I'm poor, but my daughter helps me out.  She is so glad he is gone and says I act like a different person now.  I like the person I am now.    Hang in there gurls, you will know when you are ready to make that change.  And when you feel it, do it and never look back.  I'm 55 and don't have that many years left here and i chose to be happy for once in my life and live it the way I want and I do not regret it at all.  I love you all and I am here for you anytime you need me.    Without all of you, i would never have done it.   God Bless You All, Lesa --- On Sat, 8/15/09, Sara DeJesus <s_m_dejesus@ yahoo.com> wrote: From: Sara DeJesus <s_m_dejesus@ yahoo.com> Subject: [Recovery-World- Al-Anon] alcoholics and addicts as psychic vampires? To: Recovery-World- Al-Anon@yahoogro ups.com Date: Saturday, August 15, 2009, 5:28 AM   Dear Al-Anon Friends,   I don't know if this will mean anything to anyone else, but it hit me like a bucket of ice water in the face.  I have been reading a book Unholy Hungers: Encountering the Psychic Vampire in Ourselves and Others by Barbara Holt.  Ms. Holt is a Jungian psychoanalyst and the concept of the psychic vampire is something Jung himself came up with to explain those people were are energy drainers and all around leeches.  The following is an excerpt from the book:   "Revenants are victims whom the vampire has not transformed into a vampire themselves.  Instead, they function as servants to a vampire, existing in a statae that the vampire maintains at the perfect balance between life and death ... The servant pledges his will to his lord and acts as if he were perpetually hypnotized ... keeping curious visitors ... at bay and providing a constant supply of ... fresh blood, barring all doors and access to the master's place of rest, and making sure that when away from home, the conditons necessary to the life of his master are maintained.  This servant has probably the only close relationship with the vampire, for he is permitted to witness the whole truth of his master's life.  (Maschetti 1992, 96)       Thus the revenant serves as mesmerized accomplice to the vampire, whom he or she resembles and supports, but does not imitate in predation.  The revenant recalls the original motion of codependency, in which friends and relatives enable adn abusive behavior, while abandoning themselves to a state of misery and self-negating unconsiousness.      If psychic vampire = alcoholic/addict (or their disease, which is more accurate I think) and revenant = co-dependent, this fits my mother perfectly - and, unfortunately, me for many years.      Anyway, whether anyone else sees this as an accurate similie or not, it sure is a wake-up call to me and what my disease of Al-Anonism is.   Peace and blessings to all of you!   Sara