Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted.  Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one  can die.  Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him  without an erection, make him a sandwich.  Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a  person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.  Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky...not really good for anything,  but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the  stairs.  Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in  hospitals dying of nothing.  Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no  attention to criticism.  Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars  and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?  Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now  the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.  AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006 - We know exactly where one cow with  mad-cow disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in  America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of terrorists  are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge  of Homeland Security.Ten thoughts to ponder for 2006