Re: [Psychopaths and Narcissists group] help.......
I know exactly how you feel. Remember the Channel No. 5 commercial...."Share the fantasy"? That's how I felt when my husband (of 12 years) and I split up. Share the fantasy!!! It was all a fantasy. Nothing was as I perceived it. I felt like my soul was doing the "Indian death wail". You just have to take things in stride, like a long jumper (is that what they are called?). You know they run and jump a jump, and then run a few more feet and jump another jump, and so on. One jump at a time. That's how you have to handle your next relationships and most won't be "the one" but you will learn things and take things from each relationship with you. It's nice to know there are men out there like you. I feel about men like you feel about your x. It's refreshing in MHO. Hang in there, after it's the worst it can be there is nowhere to go but up!
Subject: Re: [Psychopaths and Narcissists group] help.......
How and when does the pain of being used go away? I cant trust, I dont beleive anything anyone says, I long for the woman I thought I knew and believed in, and its all gone. I stand here alone, and she found somebody new in alittle over a month and says I am the blame of our relationship ending. I know I am not, but what happened I will never know. I dont want to become a horrible person who uses, but it seems like that is all there is out there. I am so ashamed of myself as a person for giving my heart to a woman who says cheating on her ex spouse for over 8 years is not that "bad", and somehow I keep thinking about her good qualities instead of the fact that she is an evil person who uses everyone for something. How do you look past all the good, and just see the evil? I miss my best friend.
--- On Tue, 6/30/09, Regina Barnes <ginateresawoohoo@yahoo.com> wrote:
From: Regina Barnes <ginateresawoohoo@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: [Psychopaths and Narcissists group] help....... To: Psychopathsgroup@yahoogroups.com Date: Tuesday, June 30, 2009, 2:39 PM
Well said, Lea! I agree. I, myself, have turned into an actor...I feel that way sometimes. It does seem that everywhere you look, there are P's and N's. It has destroyed the possibility of trust for me at this point. I don't want to remain this way. It is a dog eat dog world, but I know there are good people out there too. I just haven't surrounded myself with them or made good choices about other people's character. Truly, the few years in hell I spent with the deceiving devil, I've learned alot of lessons about myself. And I think THAT is for the good!!!
--- On Fri, 6/26/09, lea guider <phoenixfiretn70@ yahoo.com> wrote:
From: lea guider <phoenixfiretn70@ yahoo.com> Subject: Re: [Psychopaths and Narcissists group] help....... To: Psychopathsgroup@ yahoogroups. com Date: Friday, June 26, 2009, 10:06 PM
yes, in many ways i think it is our nature to be nurtured into being like them. once, i was filled with love, empathy, and compassion. now, i am just as bad as they are. a decade of hell has taught me that it is a dog eat dog world. we become situationally narcissistic as a defense mechanism. to get rid of this person in your life, you are going to have to be just as nasty and manipulative. i would like to wish you butterflies and roses, but that is not what the world has become. everywhere i look, there are N's and P's. we are either going to keep being run over by them or summon up the evil within us and get back what was stolen.
--- On Fri, 6/26/09, Jackalene <sunnydayzeahead@ yahoo.ca> wrote:
From: Jackalene <sunnydayzeahead@ yahoo.ca> Subject: Re: [Psychopaths and Narcissists group] help....... To: Psychopathsgroup@ yahoogroups. com Date: Friday, June 26, 2009, 6:24 PM
--- In Psychopathsgroup@ yahoogroups. com, quicksilver1622 <quicksilver1622@ ...> wrote: >thanks Christine... but has anyone else copied thier abusive partners abusive ways.....? that is the part that bothers me the most..that i am now acting..no different than he does.....ugh > Jackalene, > I consider you've not lost yourself at all... yes, there's been a departure but if he'd "won" you wouldn't protest. So perhaps you have just arrived at that perfect place where ENOUGH IS ENOUGH - of anyone's shadow and negative behaviors, and you are truly ready to claim and heal yourself and your life as never before. > Run to this site - www.saferelationshi ps.com Sandra Brown has very powerful information that works! > You are better than you know. Don't even give him any more power by beating yourself. > Blessings to you, > > > Christine > > "Well-behaved women rarely make history." > -Laurel Thatcher Ulrich > > --- On Thu, 6/25/09, Jackalene <sunnydayzeahead@ ...> wrote: > > > From: Jackalene <sunnydayzeahead@ ...> > Subject: [Psychopaths and Narcissists group] help....... > To: Psychopathsgroup@ yahoogroups. com > Date: Thursday, June 25, 2009, 11:16 PM > > > > > > > > > I have been married(my second marriage) to my spouse for six year. when we first me...he was wonderful..attentiv e, loving, fun,exciting, ..honestly. ..the perfect person.....there were shades of emotional manipulation i had noticed..but. ..all the wonderful things seemed to balance it all out...The day we were married.(a very simple ceremony..only parents and witnesses) we were to meet for lunch...to steal a few special momments before our lifelong commitment.. .i waited for him to show up..for over an hour..called his cell..no answer..an hour before the ceremony...he called and said how excited he was to see me..and brought me a pair of diamond earings..when i asked where he was for lunch..he blew up..saying how he was out doing somthing nice for me, then said he regretted it since i was giving the third degree.i was so confused..and felt guilty for asking after recieving the earings so i said nothing..... ....wedding went fine..he did not want to be > intimate that nite, nor the next five years..with the exception of approximately five times....during the five year span...verbally he came insultive... i just ignored it...then he started ignoring me...i thought i was doing somthing wrong..so i strived sooo hard to be "better" at everything for him...i only seemed to agrivate him further..yet still i begged..and pleaded for his love..and attention..which seemed to empower him further..finally after 4 years he moved out..telling me he was giving me three months to get my self together...and after i did that he would come back...i did everything he asked..and he stayed gone ...for an entire year...the whole time..he would not answer my calls..but he would call me...he would not open his door..unless he invited me over..his place was a pigsty...i would clean it..he was broke..i bought him food..and cooked for several meals weekly... daily..i would cry..asking if he was being unfaithful.. he would tell > me..in cold hard words yes i love you..now shut up...no i am not screwing around on you..now shut up or i will...it all seems like a whirlwind... .he moved back..and it is worse than ever..we live in a home that my parents bought for my inheritance. ..he will not leave...and threatens me if i kick him out and divorce him..he will take half the house..and anything else i have..which is not much..as my first husband took everything when he left... > the last year..when my husband and i argue....i have begun being sooo nasty verbally...i have started speaking in a way that shocks me..it is exactly how he speaks to me...but that is him...and now..i have turned into that.....omg. ..where can i get supports...to get the strenghth to get him out...and keep him out..adn stop my abusive behaviors... i hate myself soo much right now for lowering myself to this level..and for loosing myself to this "man" >
I have been married(my second marriage) to my spouse for six year. when we first me...he was wonderful..attentive, loving, fun,exciting,..honestly...the...
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I know exactly how you feel. Remember the Channel No. 5 commercial....
Share the fantasy"? That's how I felt when my husband (of 12 years) and I
split up....
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