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Hi everyone,
First off I hope y'all are having a great Holiday season. Things here have been really tough, the Holiday's are hard to begin with but with my Mom being gone it makes them even tougher.
The week before Thanksgiving my nephew ended up in the hospital (again this year) with RSV. Luckily he got to come home the day before Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving has always been a tough holiday for me, having to be around all that food is stressful. That compounded with the fact that Thanksgiving being the last day I ever got to see my Mom alive make for a "why in the hell can't we just SKIP this holiday" type of day.
cooking, cleaning, And of course the whole month of December is just one big stress after another. So much to do so little time, get the tree and decorations up here, at my Aunts, grandmothers, and Cheri's house (we all help each other);shopping, wrapping, shipping presents to the "Maine family." The lists go on and on. Not to mention I can't seem to get into the "Christmas spirit" this year. I miss my Mom, I am stressed to the max, I'm exhausted I just want to be DONE with the Holiday's.
I have another list a mile long of things that now can't be done until after the holidays. Most importantly I need to follow up on the letter I sent to nursing school about being re-accepted for the February term.
I think my boyfriend and I may have broken up, we haven't seen or talked to each other in about a month. But I can't even be bothered to care, though I suppose after 2 1/2 years some finalization to the fact might be nice.
I'm just so tired physically and emotionally. I can't seem to find the strength to fight the ED or to care about anything. Which of course realistically I know not fighting the ED and starving myself just make me more exhausted. I just feel so stuck inside the "I want to get better, no I don't cycle." OK wow I have ranted long enough. It's been so quiet on here hope everyone is doing well and not letting the holidays stress them out as much as I am.
Ari
The best games are on Xbox 360. Click here for a special offer on an Xbox 360 Console. Get it now!
First off I hope y'all are having a great Holiday season. Things here have been really tough, the Holiday's are hard to begin with but with my Mom being gone it makes them even tougher.
The week before Thanksgiving my nephew ended up in the hospital (again this year) with RSV. Luckily he got to come home the day before Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving has always been a tough holiday for me, having to be around all that food is stressful. That compounded with the fact that Thanksgiving being the last day I ever got to see my Mom alive make for a "why in the hell can't we just SKIP this holiday" type of day.
cooking, cleaning, And of course the whole month of December is just one big stress after another. So much to do so little time, get the tree and decorations up here, at my Aunts, grandmothers, and Cheri's house (we all help each other);shopping, wrapping, shipping presents to the "Maine family." The lists go on and on. Not to mention I can't seem to get into the "Christmas spirit" this year. I miss my Mom, I am stressed to the max, I'm exhausted I just want to be DONE with the Holiday's.
I have another list a mile long of things that now can't be done until after the holidays. Most importantly I need to follow up on the letter I sent to nursing school about being re-accepted for the February term.
I think my boyfriend and I may have broken up, we haven't seen or talked to each other in about a month. But I can't even be bothered to care, though I suppose after 2 1/2 years some finalization to the fact might be nice.
I'm just so tired physically and emotionally. I can't seem to find the strength to fight the ED or to care about anything. Which of course realistically I know not fighting the ED and starving myself just make me more exhausted. I just feel so stuck inside the "I want to get better, no I don't cycle." OK wow I have ranted long enough. It's been so quiet on here hope everyone is doing well and not letting the holidays stress them out as much as I am.
Ari
The best games are on Xbox 360. Click here for a special offer on an Xbox 360 Console. Get it now!
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