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#1471 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Tue Mar 10, 2009 3:17 am
Subject: Donna
jhum07
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Hi Donna,
Very sorry to hear about your loss. While this group hasn't been actively posting in awhile, there's some here who have lost their spouse as well.
 
Can you please tell us about your husband? Had he been sick when he died, or was it sudden? Maybe you could tell us how long you were married and some things about him that we could get to know you both a little bit better.

Again, very sorry for the loss that you're grieving. It's really not been that long to experience such a devestating loss, so your hurt is very understandable. Thank you for visiting here, and I pray God's peace be with you during this time of your grieving.
 
John



#1470 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Thu Feb 7, 2008 8:18 pm
Subject: RE: Are you alright?
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Hi Kay,
I had heard the news and, of course, I'm so happy for you and Steve. Kay, you showed such depth of character and integrity walking through a horrible illness, and that's the person that is entering this new phase of life with Steve. I know God is richly blessing you and holding you closely in his arms of love.
 
Aaron only wanted you to be happy, and knowing that this makes you happy and fulfilled would bring a smile to his face I'm sure.
 
Hopefully we can get together at some point and either have a meal or just fellowship. We'll see if God leads us back Cedarcreek way again.
 
Thanks for chiming in Kay. Great to hear from you.
 
John

AARON MCNULTY <aaronnkay@...> wrote:
Hi John,
 
Good to hear from you.  I am not in the tornado area, but I have been wanting to let you know that I got married over the Thanksgiving weekend.  My husbands name is Steve and my new last name is Patterson.  I guess sometime after a year of Aaron's death, I just felt like I really didn't want to live the rest of my life alone.  So I started being open to the idea of dating.  It was a huge step for me and really hard, but I am very happy that I did.  Aaron took care of making sure all of my transitions would be as smooth as possible and I know he did not want me to be alone either.  Between his planning and God's direction, I really felt free to marry again.  I will never fall out of love with Aaron and Steve is totally supportive of that.  We still attend Cedarcreek and have only felt love and support from our church family too.
 
Kay Patterson (formerly McNulty)

To: grief_group@yahoogroups.com
From: jhum07@yahoo.com
Date: Thu, 7 Feb 2008 10:03:35 -0800
Subject: [Grief_Group] Are you alright?

Hello All,
I know we have a few people on our list down south. I'm not sure if you were in the way of any tornadoes, but if you could check in, that would be nice. Let us know if you're okay, or how we might pray or support you.
 
Thanks,

John

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#1469 From: AARON MCNULTY <aaronnkay@...>
Date: Thu Feb 7, 2008 7:23 pm
Subject: RE: Are you alright?
mcnultykay
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Hi John,
 
Good to hear from you.  I am not in the tornado area, but I have been wanting to let you know that I got married over the Thanksgiving weekend.  My husbands name is Steve and my new last name is Patterson.  I guess sometime after a year of Aaron's death, I just felt like I really didn't want to live the rest of my life alone.  So I started being open to the idea of dating.  It was a huge step for me and really hard, but I am very happy that I did.  Aaron took care of making sure all of my transitions would be as smooth as possible and I know he did not want me to be alone either.  Between his planning and God's direction, I really felt free to marry again.  I will never fall out of love with Aaron and Steve is totally supportive of that.  We still attend Cedarcreek and have only felt love and support from our church family too.
 
Kay Patterson (formerly McNulty)

To: grief_group@yahoogroups.com
From: jhum07@...
Date: Thu, 7 Feb 2008 10:03:35 -0800
Subject: [Grief_Group] Are you alright?

Hello All,
I know we have a few people on our list down south. I'm not sure if you were in the way of any tornadoes, but if you could check in, that would be nice. Let us know if you're okay, or how we might pray or support you.
 
Thanks,

John


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#1468 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Thu Feb 7, 2008 6:03 pm
Subject: Are you alright?
jhum07
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Hello All,
I know we have a few people on our list down south. I'm not sure if you were in the way of any tornadoes, but if you could check in, that would be nice. Let us know if you're okay, or how we might pray or support you.
 
Thanks,

John


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#1467 From: amy becker <pallnursing@...>
Date: Tue Jan 15, 2008 5:24 pm
Subject: Re: January Check In and Praise Reports
pallnursing
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Betty,
   Hello, of course i don't mind you making my idea a
group effort and improving on it.  I'm always open to
the idea of two heads are better than one!

   I'm so sorry you had to go threw the flood like
that.  It sounds terrible, but how wonderful that you
can see God's work and how He places His hands upon us
when we are faced with adversities.

   I wish you the best of luck with the clean up
process, and God bless the gentlemen for helping you
as they are.

    How are the rest of the homes coming along?  Will
you be back in your home soon?  Good luck with trying
to sell.  I will pray that your home sells and that
your brother does not give you any trouble along the
way.

   I would love to type more, but about 2 hours ago, I
just got home from the emergency room.  Long story
short...I was preheating the oven to make muffins this
morning, opened the oven to find I forgot to take out
some dishes that I hid in there.  A large bowl had
melted and after removing everything I tried to scrap
the bottom of the oven.  Well it stuck to the spatula,
I hit the spatula on the garbage can.  Instead of it
going inside the can, it came up and landed on my
hand, along with melted plastic that strung around my
fingers.  After trying to shake it off, I finally used
my other hand and it then stuck to that hand.  I have
2nd degree burns to both hands and most of my fingers.
  Luckily with in a few minutes my ex boyfriend showed
up and took me to the hospital.  I praise God for
sending Larry over here when I needed him.  I had foot
surgery and still am unable to drive.

Blessings to all,
Amy~
--- Betty <bchile@...> wrote:

>
> I thought Amy's recommendation of a monthly check in
> was good but I
> modified it a bit...hope you don't mind Amy.    I
> thought...instead of
> having everyone just check in..why not have it a
> praise report time once
> a month.   We all have some really hard things we've
> either been thru,
> are going thru now or may have to walk thru in the
> future but God tells
> us to continually have praises to our Lord on our
> lips and in the
> honoring of our Lord we will keep our eyes upon the
> healer and providers
> of all things rather than become overwhelmed in the
> problems at hand.
>
> I will begin.   It is January 15th and I am signing
> in and praising God
> for His mighty protection and unending blessings of
> friends and
> christian brothers and sisters and provision for our
> needs.   One week
> ago last night my town flooded...what they call a
> 100 year flood....and
> almost 150-200 are without a home to go home to or
> with homes where
> anywhere from 2-4 foot of muddy water came into
> their living area.   I
> live on a block with 8 houses and am within 3 houses
> of the creek which
> flooded.   I have a full basement with about 26
> steps going down into it
> and my basement filled with water(even with 3 pumps
> going!) to within 2
> steps of coming up into the living area and the
> house was surrounded to
> the point of only one step and the landing of the
> front porch of the
> water coming into the front door.  A basement window
> was broken out by
> debris just letting water pour in that way too.
> However....God stopped
> the water before it got to the rafters in my
> basement and thus my living
> area is dry and did not even appear to draw moisture
> into the flooring
> or carpet.    The basement is concrete block and,
> while I lost all the
> momentos of my childhood and my grandparents,
> parents, etc.....I was
> saved.   Even my furnace which was under water and
> which the repairman
> said he was sure there was no way it would start
> up...that I would have
> to put an all new one in....he replaced parts in it
> and my furnace fired
> up and as of last night has been working even better
> than it had been
> before the flood!   My water heater is working.   My
> electrical box was
> covered with water but God saw that my power never
> faltered at the house
> and my sump pump kept going the whole time.   I
> evacuated myself from
> the house about 2am last Tues am after just an
> intense sense that I
> needed to get out of there.   AT the time I only had
> 4 inches of water
> in my basement.  By all accounts of talking to my
> neighbors last
> Saturday when we were at the house working...my
> house was surrounded by
> water within about 30 minutes of when I left with a
> few things and my
> dog to some friends house where I am still staying.
>   Men from my
> church came down last Saturday and cleaned out 3/4th
> of the basement and
> are planning on coming back this Saturday to finish
> that and power wash
> it and sanitize it for me(they won't even let me do
> that part of it).
> After that I am going to have my pastor pray over
> the house before I
> move back in and will be looking at selling it this
> year which will mean
> a battle with my brother who owns half of it but
> does nothing to help
> with it's upkeep.  But God has provided safety, a
> place to stay and many
> blessings for me in all of this....God is a good
> God!
>
> Betty
>
>



      
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#1466 From: "Betty" <bchile@...>
Date: Tue Jan 15, 2008 2:03 pm
Subject: January Check In and Praise Reports
cocoaasmom
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I thought Amy's recommendation of a monthly check in was good but I modified it a bit...hope you don't mind Amy.    I thought...instead of having everyone just check in..why not have it a praise report time once a month.   We all have some really hard things we've either been thru, are going thru now or may have to walk thru in the future but God tells us to continually have praises to our Lord on our lips and in the honoring of our Lord we will keep our eyes upon the healer and providers of all things rather than become overwhelmed in the problems at hand.

I will begin.   It is January 15th and I am signing in and praising God for His mighty protection and unending blessings of friends and christian brothers and sisters and provision for our needs.   One week ago last night my town flooded...what they call a 100 year flood....and almost 150-200 are without a home to go home to or with homes where anywhere from 2-4 foot of muddy water came into their living area.   I live on a block with 8 houses and am within 3 houses of the creek which flooded.   I have a full basement with about 26 steps going down into it and my basement filled with water(even with 3 pumps going!) to within 2 steps of coming up into the living area and the house was surrounded to the point of only one step and the landing of the front porch of the water coming into the front door.  A basement window was broken out by debris just letting water pour in that way too.  However....God stopped the water before it got to the rafters in my basement and thus my living area is dry and did not even appear to draw moisture into the flooring or carpet.    The basement is concrete block and, while I lost all the momentos of my childhood and my grandparents, parents, etc.....I was saved.   Even my furnace which was under water and  which the repairman said he was sure there was no way it would start up...that I would have to put an all new one in....he replaced parts in it and my furnace fired up and as of last night has been working even better than it had been before the flood!   My water heater is working.   My electrical box was covered with water but God saw that my power never faltered at the house and my sump pump kept going the whole time.   I evacuated myself from the house about 2am last Tues am after just an intense sense that I needed to get out of there.   AT the time I only had 4 inches of water in my basement.  By all accounts of talking to my neighbors last Saturday when we were at the house working...my house was surrounded by water within about 30 minutes of when I left with a few things and my dog to some friends house where I am still staying.    Men from my church came down last Saturday and cleaned out 3/4th of the basement and are planning on coming back this Saturday to finish that and power wash it and sanitize it for me(they won't even let me do that part of it). After that I am going to have my pastor pray over the house before I move back in and will be looking at selling it this year which will mean a battle with my brother who owns half of it but does nothing to help with it's upkeep.  But God has provided safety, a place to stay and many blessings for me in all of this....God is a good God!

Betty


#1465 From: amy becker <pallnursing@...>
Date: Tue Jan 8, 2008 1:34 pm
Subject: Re: Anyone heard from John??
pallnursing
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As a matter of a fact John, I would like to chime in
and say hello with a great big hug!!!  I have so much
respect and feeling for the people in this group.  I
know we are all busy people, but I think we all grew
close to one another and maybe we should try to post
at least once a month to just say Hi and let everybody
know about the good things, or the busy things we are
doing.

I don't think we only have the grief in common, I
believe it is a willingness to reach out and show we
are human beings and most of all God's children.

So with that, the kids and I are doing well.  We have
been in the new house since the middle of July and I
think I am finally settled enough to say I really love
it here.  The kids feel the same.  I did have to take
some time off work, which I currently still am on
leave due to needing foot surgery...would you believe
it's from working too much that the sugery even came
about??!!  I should be up and running by Feb
1st..can't wait, I never liked just sitting around.

I hope this post finds everyone in good health and
spirit.  Blessings to all of you for a wonderful,
healthy, safe and happy new year!

Take Care~
Amy~

--- J Hum <jhum07@...> wrote:

> Be at war with your vices, at peace with your
> neighbors, and let every new year find you a better
> man person. Benjamin Franklin
>
>   Greetings all,
>   May this New Year of 2008 be a blessing for you in
> your growth in God, and love in your hearts for
> Jesus and one another.
>
>   Sorry I haven’t responded. The floods occurred
> about an hour south of us, and were particularly bad
> for those folks, but we were spared this time. Like
> most news stories, it’s off the front page (hence,
> everyone’s radar), but it’s still really bad for the
> people in that area, many of whom lost everything
> (just like those in the California wildfires).
>
>   I’m sorry for my absence here on this site. There
> hasn’t really been activity so I haven’t invested
> ANY time in it at all, but that does not mean I
> haven’t prayed for you all, or that I don’t hold you
> close in my hearts.
>
>   As a chaplain in a healthcare facility, a pastor
> of a small church, and a family, including parents
> in their declining years that need attention, I’ve
> not had the emotional or spiritual energy to post
> here when I’ve had the time.
>
> My sincere hope and prayer is that you’re getting
> (and giving) support and strength to continue this
> life journey through the grief and suffering it
> delivers. Blessings can and do abound in the good
> times and the hard times. I know in my own hardships
> that God is present—yea, even more present—just as
> he is in the good or upbeat times. It may not feel
> that way, but God doesn’t call us to walk by
> positive emotions, but by faith. I know that’s a
> hard one, but it’s truth.
>
>   I have a deep love and respect for you all that
> I’ve walked with here for several years. If you
> would like to chime in and say hi, that would be
> great.
>
>   Betty, thanks for inquiring of my whereabouts.
> You’ve been a great friend and partner here on this
> grief site. I know you’re equally as busy as I am,
> and I sincerely hope all is going great for you—I
> know you’re being a blessing for those around you!
>
>   God’s great grace and love be with you all in
> abundance.
>
> John
>
> Betty <bchile@...> wrote:            Had
> anyone heard from John?
>   I haven't heard from him since all the flooding in
> his part of the country and am concerned that he is
> ok.
>   Also...with all the storms....it would be good if
> everyone could check in just so we know if you're ok
> or not and/or how to pray for you.   I realize that
> people in the plains states will be without power in
> some places for another 10 days(barring anymore
> storms there) so everyone please let us keep each
> other in prayers not only for healing but for safety
> in this winter weather that is hitting the country.
>  God was gracious to me and we just missed the worst
> of the ice storm by only miles.
>   Betty
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with
> Yahoo! Mobile.  Try it now.



      
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#1464 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Wed Jan 2, 2008 2:02 pm
Subject: Re: Anyone heard from John??
jhum07
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Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better man person. Benjamin Franklin
 
Greetings all,
May this New Year of 2008 be a blessing for you in your growth in God, and love in your hearts for Jesus and one another.
 
Sorry I haven’t responded. The floods occurred about an hour south of us, and were particularly bad for those folks, but we were spared this time. Like most news stories, it’s off the front page (hence, everyone’s radar), but it’s still really bad for the people in that area, many of whom lost everything (just like those in the California wildfires).
 
I’m sorry for my absence here on this site. There hasn’t really been activity so I haven’t invested ANY time in it at all, but that does not mean I haven’t prayed for you all, or that I don’t hold you close in my hearts.
 
As a chaplain in a healthcare facility, a pastor of a small church, and a family, including parents in their declining years that need attention, I’ve not had the emotional or spiritual energy to post here when I’ve had the time.

My sincere hope and prayer is that you’re getting (and giving) support and strength to continue this life journey through the grief and suffering it delivers. Blessings can and do abound in the good times and the hard times. I know in my own hardships that God is present—yea, even more present—just as he is in the good or upbeat times. It may not feel that way, but God doesn’t call us to walk by positive emotions, but by faith. I know that’s a hard one, but it’s truth.
 
I have a deep love and respect for you all that I’ve walked with here for several years. If you would like to chime in and say hi, that would be great.
 
Betty, thanks for inquiring of my whereabouts. You’ve been a great friend and partner here on this grief site. I know you’re equally as busy as I am, and I sincerely hope all is going great for you—I know you’re being a blessing for those around you!
 
God’s great grace and love be with you all in abundance.
 
John

Betty <bchile@...> wrote:
Had anyone heard from John?  
I haven't heard from him since all the flooding in his part of the country and am concerned that he is ok.
Also...with all the storms....it would be good if everyone could check in just so we know if you're ok or not and/or how to pray for you.   I realize that people in the plains states will be without power in some places for another 10 days(barring anymore storms there) so everyone please let us keep each other in prayers not only for healing but for safety in this winter weather that is hitting the country.   God was gracious to me and we just missed the worst of the ice storm by only miles.
Betty


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#1463 From: "Betty" <bchile@...>
Date: Thu Dec 13, 2007 3:56 pm
Subject: Anyone heard from John??
cocoaasmom
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Had anyone heard from John?  

I haven't heard from him since all the flooding in his part of the country and am concerned that he is ok.

Also...with all the storms....it would be good if everyone could check in just so we know if you're ok or not and/or how to pray for you.   I realize that people in the plains states will be without power in some places for another 10 days(barring anymore storms there) so everyone please let us keep each other in prayers not only for healing but for safety in this winter weather that is hitting the country.   God was gracious to me and we just missed the worst of the ice storm by only miles.

Betty


#1462 From: "Betty" <bchile@...>
Date: Thu Dec 13, 2007 3:52 pm
Subject: God Bless and Good MOrning to All
cocoaasmom
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God bless and Good Morning to all....

I pray that God is drawing all of you close to Him during this Christmas season as we celebrate the gift of grace He gave to all of us with the birth of Jesus as man to dwell among us and fulfill his promise to save us for eternity with Him.

I pray that all will remember daily to turn over to God all the hurt and healing knowing the God never leaves His  children alone in anything.

God Bless you all...Merry Christmas!

 

Betty


#1461 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Wed Nov 7, 2007 6:38 pm
Subject: Re: Good Morning Everyone
jhum07
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Hi Betty,
Thank you, and God's grace and peace be with you as well.
 
Wonderful to hear from you and great word about the holiday season.
 
A poem and a verse for all. May God be with you all in comfort and joy:
 
 
WHAT A DAY THAT WILL BE

What a day that will be
When my Jesus comes for me
I will look into the face
of the one who saved me by His Grace
In His presence I will stand
as He Welcomes me into the Promise Land
For I know with the Lord I will forever be
What a glorious day for me.

Philip R. Drogich
Lawrenceville IL
 
Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.  And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.  
 
2 Corinthians 3:17-18   


Betty <bchile@...> wrote:
Good Morning everyone and I pray that today is a day of blessings of
the peace of God for all of you.

Fall is here and the holidays are around the corner but remember that
God never gets too busy to hear your prayers, to wrap His arms around
you in comfort nor to fill your hearts with peace and joy even in the
midst of the journey of grief.

Betty


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#1460 From: "Betty" <bchile@...>
Date: Wed Nov 7, 2007 2:08 pm
Subject: Good Morning Everyone
cocoaasmom
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Good Morning everyone and I pray that today is a day of blessings of
the peace of God for all of you.

Fall is here and the holidays are around the corner but remember that
God never gets too busy to hear your prayers, to wrap His arms around
you in comfort nor to fill your hearts with peace and joy even in the
midst of the journey of grief.

Betty

#1459 From: "DRDUNCAN" <flwrjunki@...>
Date: Fri Oct 12, 2007 9:53 pm
Subject: RE: Once again.
flwrjunkie0914
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Oh I am so sorry. There is a lady down the street who is in her last days. All her family came in today. I often pray that we don’t have to hurt anymore over things like this but we will still have to. So I pray for courage for you and strength to get through the days. I am also praying for your dad. Please take care of yourself and let others take care of you also.

Donna

 


From: Grief_Group@yahoogroups.com [mailto:Grief_Group@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf Of Evelyn
Sent: Wednesday, October 10, 2007 2:08 AM
To: grief_group@yahoogroups.com
Subject: [Grief_Group] Once again.

 

 

 

On September 11th.  I said goodbye to the second mother in my life.

 

My beloved Mother-in-law went to join my mom in heaven.

 

She was the most wonderful woman and never, ever did I only consider or think of her as mother-in-law.   She was always my second mom.   Since my own mom passed away in 2005, she and I had developed an even deeper and loving relationship than before.  I accompanied her to all of her doctors appointments and tests and went each day to give her her insulin shots.  Something I never thought I would be able to do but because she asked it of me I learned.  I learned to do many things that I never thought I could.  I never could stand the sight of blood but with her I found that it didn't bother me because she needed me.  I held her arm while they drew blood and bathed her and just loved her.

 

The family gathered in her room and there was never so much love in one place.   Each loving her and wanting to be near her in her final hours.   I sat on her bed and held her hand and all I could think was how blessed I had been to have had her in my life.    They say that they can hear you even though outwardly there are no signs of it.   So, I talked to her and told her how very much I loved her and how much her returned love had meant to me for the last 40 years.  How she had always been there in times of joy and sorrow.   How many babies she had rocked with her gentle hands. 

 

She had been in the ICU on a ventilator again for the second time in three months.  Like two years ago, the family who could travel home did and we again spent around the clock with her.   Then she began to improve and she was moved  to the step down unit.  All was well for one night.  Then we got a call early the morning of the 11th and they told us we were needed right away.  When we arrived she was having a very hard time breathing but she and dad had talked already and decided that she did not want to be put back on life support.  So, we gathered in her room and just filled it with love.  The hospital staff were wonderful and gave us the space we needed but also gave us the support that we wanted.  A stranger came in from the room next door and just asked if she could pray for her.   She attracted people because of her loving nature.  All I could do was sit and hold her hand and tell her how very much she was loved.   Those out of town called on the phone and we held the phone to her ear.   We can't know how much she heard but each in turn told her of their love.   Gently she was taken from us and delivered into the arms of God.

 

I miss her.  There are times I just want to call and talk to her.  It is extremely hard to go to see dad because I see her still sitting in her chair and then she isn't there.  It seems I've lost so many of those that are the closest to me in the last short while.  But this was the second mother that I have lost.  It hurts.   I am an extremely strong person but this one has really thrown me for a loop.   Is I have come to you.  The place I can unload my feelings and feel the calm and peace that this place gives me.  She was a blessing in my life.

 

Thank you for being there......again.

 

Evelyn

 

 

 

 


#1458 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Wed Oct 10, 2007 4:33 pm
Subject: Re: Re: Once again.
jhum07
Offline Offline
Send Email Send Email
 
Hi Evelyn,
As I was running this morning, this group was heavily on my mind so I began to pray. I now know why!
 
I'm very sorry you lost this dear woman with whom you had such an incredible relationship. God taught you many memorable life lessons through caring for her; overcoming obstacles that previously you would never have done is a huge step in life--and you got to grow in that area through your relationship with her.
 
Thank you for sharing with us the deep relationship you had with her, and what a wonderful person she was. It was such a touching account of her life. The love she shared through her life surrounded her on her death bed.
 
I know why you were so close to her because you are a person of deep character and love yourself. The things you wrote about her could easily be written about you too. Her life was enhanced because of the special relationship she had with her daughter-in-law--scratch that, her daughter!
 
May God be close with you through the grief and pain of the separation we experience in this life through death.
 

We will not have that in the next!
 
God's peace to you Evelyn.

Betty <bchile@...> wrote:
Evelyn,
I am so sorry to hear of your loss as I know how very close you were with your mother in law and how much she meant to you.   She was definitely a testiment to God's love to you and to everyone she encountered it seems.   You have wonderful gifts of memories from knowing her and, while that does not change the loss, it does serve to continue to let her love touch your heart even in your grief.  It has been a long and many times hard row these last couple years especially for you but remember that God is always there and His arms of strength and comfort hold you 24-7.
Betty

--- In Grief_Group@yahoogroups.com, "Evelyn" <edandevmil@...> wrote:
>
>
>
> On September 11th. I said goodbye to the second mother in my life.
>
> My beloved Mother-in-law went to join my mom in heaven.
>
> She was the most wonderful woman and never, ever did I only consider or
> think of her as mother-in-law. She was always my second mom. Since my
> own mom passed away in 2005, she and I had developed an even deeper and
> loving relationship than before. I accompanied her to all of her doctors
> appointments and tests and went each day to give her her insulin shots.
> Something I never thought I would be able to do but because she asked it of
> me I learned. I learned to do many things that I never thought I could. I
> never could stand the sight of blood but with her I found that it didn't
> bother me because she needed me. I held her arm while they drew blood and
> bathed her and just loved her.
>
> The family gathered in her room and there was never so much love in one
> place. Each loving her and wanting to be near her in her final hours. I
> sat on her bed and held her hand and all I could think was how blessed I had
> been to have had her in my life. They say that they can hear you even
> though outwardly there are no signs of it. So, I talked to her and told
> her how very much I loved her and how much her returned love had meant to me
> for the last 40 years. How she had always been there in times of joy and
> sorrow. How many babies she had rocked with her gentle hands.
>
> She had been in the ICU on a ventilator again for the second time in three
> months. Like two years ago, the family who could travel home did and we
> again spent around the clock with her. Then she began to improve and she
> was moved to the step down unit. All was well for one night. Then we got
> a call early the morning of the 11th and they told us we were needed right
> away. When we arrived she was having a very hard time breathing but she and
> dad had talked already and decided that she did not want to be put back on
> life support. So, we gathered in her room and just filled it with love.
> The hospital staff were wonderful and gave us the space we needed but also
> gave us the support that we wanted. A stranger came in from the room next
> door and just asked if she could pray for her. She attracted people
> because of her loving nature. All I could do was sit and hold her hand and
> tell her how very much she was loved. Those out of town called on the
> phone and we held the phone to her ear. We can't know how much she heard
> but each in turn told her of their love. Gently she was taken from us and
> delivered into the arms of God.
>
> I miss her. There are times I just want to call and talk to her. It is
> extremely hard to go to see dad because I see her still sitting in her chair
> and then she isn't there. It seems I've lost so many of those that are the
> closest to me in the last short while. But this was the second mother that
> I have lost. It hurts. I am an extremely strong person but this one has
> really thrown me for a loop. Is I have come to you. The place I can
> unload my feelings and feel the calm and peace that this place gives me.
> She was a blessing in my life.
>
> Thank you for being there......again.
>
> Evelyn
>


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#1457 From: "Betty" <bchile@...>
Date: Wed Oct 10, 2007 1:10 pm
Subject: Re: Once again.
cocoaasmom
Offline Offline
Send Email Send Email
 

Evelyn,

I am so sorry to hear of your loss as I know how very close you were with your mother in law and how much she meant to you.   She was definitely a testiment to God's love to you and to everyone she encountered it seems.   You have wonderful gifts of memories from knowing her and, while that does not change the loss, it does serve to continue to let her love touch your heart even in your grief.  It has been a long and many times hard row these last couple years especially for you but remember that God is always there and His arms of strength and comfort hold you 24-7.

Betty


--- In Grief_Group@yahoogroups.com, "Evelyn" <edandevmil@...> wrote:
>
>
>
> On September 11th. I said goodbye to the second mother in my life.
>
> My beloved Mother-in-law went to join my mom in heaven.
>
> She was the most wonderful woman and never, ever did I only consider or
> think of her as mother-in-law. She was always my second mom. Since my
> own mom passed away in 2005, she and I had developed an even deeper and
> loving relationship than before. I accompanied her to all of her doctors
> appointments and tests and went each day to give her her insulin shots.
> Something I never thought I would be able to do but because she asked it of
> me I learned. I learned to do many things that I never thought I could. I
> never could stand the sight of blood but with her I found that it didn't
> bother me because she needed me. I held her arm while they drew blood and
> bathed her and just loved her.
>
> The family gathered in her room and there was never so much love in one
> place. Each loving her and wanting to be near her in her final hours. I
> sat on her bed and held her hand and all I could think was how blessed I had
> been to have had her in my life. They say that they can hear you even
> though outwardly there are no signs of it. So, I talked to her and told
> her how very much I loved her and how much her returned love had meant to me
> for the last 40 years. How she had always been there in times of joy and
> sorrow. How many babies she had rocked with her gentle hands.
>
> She had been in the ICU on a ventilator again for the second time in three
> months. Like two years ago, the family who could travel home did and we
> again spent around the clock with her. Then she began to improve and she
> was moved to the step down unit. All was well for one night. Then we got
> a call early the morning of the 11th and they told us we were needed right
> away. When we arrived she was having a very hard time breathing but she and
> dad had talked already and decided that she did not want to be put back on
> life support. So, we gathered in her room and just filled it with love.
> The hospital staff were wonderful and gave us the space we needed but also
> gave us the support that we wanted. A stranger came in from the room next
> door and just asked if she could pray for her. She attracted people
> because of her loving nature. All I could do was sit and hold her hand and
> tell her how very much she was loved. Those out of town called on the
> phone and we held the phone to her ear. We can't know how much she heard
> but each in turn told her of their love. Gently she was taken from us and
> delivered into the arms of God.
>
> I miss her. There are times I just want to call and talk to her. It is
> extremely hard to go to see dad because I see her still sitting in her chair
> and then she isn't there. It seems I've lost so many of those that are the
> closest to me in the last short while. But this was the second mother that
> I have lost. It hurts. I am an extremely strong person but this one has
> really thrown me for a loop. Is I have come to you. The place I can
> unload my feelings and feel the calm and peace that this place gives me.
> She was a blessing in my life.
>
> Thank you for being there......again.
>
> Evelyn
>


#1456 From: "Evelyn" <edandevmil@...>
Date: Wed Oct 10, 2007 7:08 am
Subject: Once again.
catlady514
Offline Offline
Send Email Send Email
 
 
 
On September 11th.  I said goodbye to the second mother in my life.
 
My beloved Mother-in-law went to join my mom in heaven.
 
She was the most wonderful woman and never, ever did I only consider or think of her as mother-in-law.   She was always my second mom.   Since my own mom passed away in 2005, she and I had developed an even deeper and loving relationship than before.  I accompanied her to all of her doctors appointments and tests and went each day to give her her insulin shots.  Something I never thought I would be able to do but because she asked it of me I learned.  I learned to do many things that I never thought I could.  I never could stand the sight of blood but with her I found that it didn't bother me because she needed me.  I held her arm while they drew blood and bathed her and just loved her.
 
The family gathered in her room and there was never so much love in one place.   Each loving her and wanting to be near her in her final hours.   I sat on her bed and held her hand and all I could think was how blessed I had been to have had her in my life.    They say that they can hear you even though outwardly there are no signs of it.   So, I talked to her and told her how very much I loved her and how much her returned love had meant to me for the last 40 years.  How she had always been there in times of joy and sorrow.   How many babies she had rocked with her gentle hands. 
 
She had been in the ICU on a ventilator again for the second time in three months.  Like two years ago, the family who could travel home did and we again spent around the clock with her.   Then she began to improve and she was moved  to the step down unit.  All was well for one night.  Then we got a call early the morning of the 11th and they told us we were needed right away.  When we arrived she was having a very hard time breathing but she and dad had talked already and decided that she did not want to be put back on life support.  So, we gathered in her room and just filled it with love.  The hospital staff were wonderful and gave us the space we needed but also gave us the support that we wanted.  A stranger came in from the room next door and just asked if she could pray for her.   She attracted people because of her loving nature.  All I could do was sit and hold her hand and tell her how very much she was loved.   Those out of town called on the phone and we held the phone to her ear.   We can't know how much she heard but each in turn told her of their love.   Gently she was taken from us and delivered into the arms of God.
 
I miss her.  There are times I just want to call and talk to her.  It is extremely hard to go to see dad because I see her still sitting in her chair and then she isn't there.  It seems I've lost so many of those that are the closest to me in the last short while.  But this was the second mother that I have lost.  It hurts.   I am an extremely strong person but this one has really thrown me for a loop.   Is I have come to you.  The place I can unload my feelings and feel the calm and peace that this place gives me.  She was a blessing in my life.
 
Thank you for being there......again.
 
Evelyn

 

#1455 From: "Betty" <bchile@...>
Date: Sat Oct 6, 2007 11:13 pm
Subject: Good Evening Everyone
cocoaasmom
Offline Offline
Send Email Send Email
 
Good evening everyone and welcome to the newer members.

I wanted to say hello to all and remind you that you are in my prayers.
I also wanted to wish the newer members welcome and say that this is a
post when you need type of group....when you're having a bad day or have
questions just post and you will have a response.   We don't make people
post so often to remain a member but we want you all to know that this
group is here for whenever you need someone to talk to.

May you all see clear evidence of God's love for you and His total care
of your needs.

Betty

#1454 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Wed Aug 22, 2007 1:38 pm
Subject: It continues
jhum07
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As people that have experienced loss, we're in a good position to understand what articles like this mean. Specifically that there are families now missing a loved one--someone that will never return.
 
Let's be in prayer for families like this going through the difficulties of grief and loss.

Hope you are well in the Lord and the power if His might!
 
John
 
 
BAGHDAD - A Black Hawk helicopter went down Wednesday in northern Iraq, killing all 14 U.S. soldiers aboard, the military said, the deadliest crash since January 2005.
Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki, meanwhile, lashed out at American criticism a day after President Bush expressed frustration with the Iraqi government's inability to bridge political divisions.
"No one has the right to place timetables on the Iraq government. It was elected by its people," the Shiite leader said at a news conference in Damascus at the end of a three-day visit to Syria.
"Those who make such statements are bothered by our visit to Syria. We will pay no attention. We care for our people and our constitution and can find friends elsewhere," al-Maliki said.
The military said initial indications showed the UH-60 helicopter experienced a mechanical problem and was not brought down by hostile fire, but the cause of the crash was still under investigation.
It was one of two helicopters on a nighttime operation. The four crew members and 10 passengers who perished were assigned to Task Force Lightning, the military said. It did not release identities pending notification of relatives.
The U.S. military relies heavily on helicopters to avoid the threat of ambushes and roadside bombs — the deadliest weapon in the militants' arsenal — and dozens have crashed in accidents or been shot down.
The deadliest crash occurred on Jan. 26, 2005, when a CH-53 Sea Stallion transport helicopter went down in a sandstorm in western Iraq, killing 31 U.S. troops.
Wednesday's deaths raised to at least 3,721 members of the U.S. military who have died since the Iraq war started in March 2003, according to an Associated Press count.
Elsewhere in northern Iraq, a suicide truck bomber targeted a police agency in northern Iraq, killing at least 19 people and wounding 26, police and hospital officials said.
The attack occurred just before noon in Beiji, 155 miles north of Baghdad, and many of the casualties were civilians, according to the officials.
Iraqi police and soldiers have frequently been targeted by militants seeking to disrupt U.S.-led efforts to enable the forces to take over their own security so foreign troops can go home. A bomb and small-arms attack against a security post shared by police and U.S. paratroopers also killed 13 Iraqi officers in Beiji in late June.
Jassim Saleh, 41, who lives about 500 yards from the blast site, said he saw an explosives-laden truck carrying stones strike the police station.
"It was a horrible scene. I can't describe it," he said. "The bodies were scattered everywhere. I was injured in my hand and a leg, but I took three wounded people to the hospital in my car."
Police said nine policemen and 10 civilians were killed, while 21 civilians and five officers were wounded.
A roadside bomb also targeted a police patrol in the center of Tikrit, Saddam Hussein's hometown 80 miles north of Baghdad, killing one officer and wounding another, along with two civilians, authorities said.


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#1453 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Sat Aug 11, 2007 4:44 pm
Subject: Re: Touched By An Angel
jhum07
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Send Email Send Email
 
I shared this poem in my morning devotional and the people loved it!
 
Thanks Betty...
 

Hebrews 13:2 Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it.


Betty <bchile@...> wrote:

"Touched By An Angel"

If you know someone that makes you smile
When you sit and talk to them a while
Then you my friend have been touched
by an angel.

If you know someone that warms your heart
And  you miss them when you're far apart
Then you my friend have been touched
by an angel.

If you have a friend who's always there
And you can tell they really care
Then you my friend have been touched
by an angel.

These angels aren't the kind with wings
They're people who'll do anything
So you will feel like you've been touched
by an angel.
 
Copyright ©  2001 Ron Lantz



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#1452 From: "Betty" <bchile@...>
Date: Sat Aug 11, 2007 4:20 pm
Subject: Touched By An Angel
cocoaasmom
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"Touched By An Angel"


If you know someone that makes you smile
When you sit and talk to them a while
Then you my friend have been touched
by an angel.

If you know someone that warms your heart
And  you miss them when you're far apart
Then you my friend have been touched
by an angel.

If you have a friend who's always there
And you can tell they really care
Then you my friend have been touched
by an angel.

These angels aren't the kind with wings
They're people who'll do anything
So you will feel like you've been touched
by an angel.
 
Copyright ©  2001 Ron Lantz


#1451 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Thu Jul 26, 2007 5:07 am
Subject: Re: Hi All
jhum07
Offline Offline
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Some day we're all going to be together, fellowshipping in the presence of the Lord--and with our loved ones that have gone on before us. That's going to be a Day, and I look even more forward to it when I consider wonderful people like you all there too!!!
 
I really appreciate the depth of love and care on this site.

God be close and evident with you all...
 
John

Betty Childress <bchile@...> wrote:
I could not have said it any better than Lisa did in this message.   Yes, John, your post touched my heart and made me think.  Thank You and thanking God for always being that constant in our lives whether the sun is shining in our world or whether the dark clouds overshadow us.   God's love remains constant and strong and always there to help us.
 
Betty
 
 
----- Original Message -----
From: Lisa Hicks
Sent: Wednesday, July 25, 2007 8:01 PM
Subject: Re: [Grief_Group] Hi All

John,
 
I hope you and your family are doing well.  When I read your email I thought Praise God.  It is such a testimony to how God works in our lives and puts the right the people at the right time exactly where we need them to be. 
 
Today is Dad's birthday.  It has been the easiest "holiday" so far to get through.  I have been thinking about how far I have come in the grieving process (alot of my progress is because of you and this site) and how long it took me to get where I am all day. 
 
Reading your post on prayer reiterated everything I have been thinking aobut.  I had to post.  
 
The times I have felt closest to God, like I was literally being held in His arms were in my darkest hours.  The times when there is nothing else you can do but get on  your knees and sometimes flat on your face and give it all to Him.  Those are also the deepest prayers I have ever prayed.  I still remember them and how I felt and how in that instant He came to me and comforted me and helped me back up.
 
I am praying for you and your prayer life.  I am also praying that everyone here finds comfort and strength in Him.  That everyone who is grieving or is going through trials in their life will fill His comfort and strenght.  Even in our darkest hours all we have to do is get on our knees and call out His name and He will come. 
 
God Bless you and your family,
Lisa 
 
 
 
 
 
J Hum <jhum07@yahoo.com> wrote:
Greetings Group,
God's peace and blessing be with you all.
 
As God has called me to a deeper place of prayer (please pray that I get there!), I recognize how prayer is based on life circumstances. Inevitably, we pray about those things around us, things that bother us, challenges we face, challenges family members face, etc. Then we tend to stretch out from there and pray for church, community, city, world, and so on.
 
As hard as this may sound, I've found that the deepest and most profound of my prayers have come out of those times when I was really struggling; times when I hurt the worst, felt the most frustrated, or fearful, or just plain lost on the way. In fact, in the "good times," it's almost easy to miss good prayer altogether.
 
My word of encouragement, then, is to not allow those hard times to pass without recognition of the deep and precious work God is doing in our lives. God is not absent at those times, but calling us deeper, closer, more assuredly into his loving arms.
 
Is the journey hard? Know that God not only hears your prayers at this time, but is close to all that call upon his name.
 
May the captivating love of God, the fellowship with the Spirit, and the awesome forgiveness and favor of Jesus Christ be with you all this day.
 
John

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#1450 From: "Betty Childress" <bchile@...>
Date: Thu Jul 26, 2007 2:11 am
Subject: Re: Hi All
cocoaasmom
Offline Offline
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I could not have said it any better than Lisa did in this message.   Yes, John, your post touched my heart and made me think.  Thank You and thanking God for always being that constant in our lives whether the sun is shining in our world or whether the dark clouds overshadow us.   God's love remains constant and strong and always there to help us.
 
Betty
 
 
----- Original Message -----
From: Lisa Hicks
Sent: Wednesday, July 25, 2007 8:01 PM
Subject: Re: [Grief_Group] Hi All

John,
 
I hope you and your family are doing well.  When I read your email I thought Praise God.  It is such a testimony to how God works in our lives and puts the right the people at the right time exactly where we need them to be. 
 
Today is Dad's birthday.  It has been the easiest "holiday" so far to get through.  I have been thinking about how far I have come in the grieving process (alot of my progress is because of you and this site) and how long it took me to get where I am all day. 
 
Reading your post on prayer reiterated everything I have been thinking aobut.  I had to post.  
 
The times I have felt closest to God, like I was literally being held in His arms were in my darkest hours.  The times when there is nothing else you can do but get on  your knees and sometimes flat on your face and give it all to Him.  Those are also the deepest prayers I have ever prayed.  I still remember them and how I felt and how in that instant He came to me and comforted me and helped me back up.
 
I am praying for you and your prayer life.  I am also praying that everyone here finds comfort and strength in Him.  That everyone who is grieving or is going through trials in their life will fill His comfort and strenght.  Even in our darkest hours all we have to do is get on our knees and call out His name and He will come. 
 
God Bless you and your family,
Lisa 
 
 
 
 
 
J Hum <jhum07@yahoo.com> wrote:
Greetings Group,
God's peace and blessing be with you all.
 
As God has called me to a deeper place of prayer (please pray that I get there!), I recognize how prayer is based on life circumstances. Inevitably, we pray about those things around us, things that bother us, challenges we face, challenges family members face, etc. Then we tend to stretch out from there and pray for church, community, city, world, and so on.
 
As hard as this may sound, I've found that the deepest and most profound of my prayers have come out of those times when I was really struggling; times when I hurt the worst, felt the most frustrated, or fearful, or just plain lost on the way. In fact, in the "good times," it's almost easy to miss good prayer altogether.
 
My word of encouragement, then, is to not allow those hard times to pass without recognition of the deep and precious work God is doing in our lives. God is not absent at those times, but calling us deeper, closer, more assuredly into his loving arms.
 
Is the journey hard? Know that God not only hears your prayers at this time, but is close to all that call upon his name.
 
May the captivating love of God, the fellowship with the Spirit, and the awesome forgiveness and favor of Jesus Christ be with you all this day.
 
John

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#1449 From: Lisa Hicks <lisahicks13@...>
Date: Thu Jul 26, 2007 1:01 am
Subject: Re: Hi All
lisahicks13
Offline Offline
Send Email Send Email
 
John,
 
I hope you and your family are doing well.  When I read your email I thought Praise God.  It is such a testimony to how God works in our lives and puts the right the people at the right time exactly where we need them to be. 
 
Today is Dad's birthday.  It has been the easiest "holiday" so far to get through.  I have been thinking about how far I have come in the grieving process (alot of my progress is because of you and this site) and how long it took me to get where I am all day. 
 
Reading your post on prayer reiterated everything I have been thinking aobut.  I had to post.  
 
The times I have felt closest to God, like I was literally being held in His arms were in my darkest hours.  The times when there is nothing else you can do but get on  your knees and sometimes flat on your face and give it all to Him.  Those are also the deepest prayers I have ever prayed.  I still remember them and how I felt and how in that instant He came to me and comforted me and helped me back up.
 
I am praying for you and your prayer life.  I am also praying that everyone here finds comfort and strength in Him.  That everyone who is grieving or is going through trials in their life will fill His comfort and strenght.  Even in our darkest hours all we have to do is get on our knees and call out His name and He will come. 
 
God Bless you and your family,
Lisa 
 
 
 
 
 
J Hum <jhum07@...> wrote:
Greetings Group,
God's peace and blessing be with you all.
 
As God has called me to a deeper place of prayer (please pray that I get there!), I recognize how prayer is based on life circumstances. Inevitably, we pray about those things around us, things that bother us, challenges we face, challenges family members face, etc. Then we tend to stretch out from there and pray for church, community, city, world, and so on.
 
As hard as this may sound, I've found that the deepest and most profound of my prayers have come out of those times when I was really struggling; times when I hurt the worst, felt the most frustrated, or fearful, or just plain lost on the way. In fact, in the "good times," it's almost easy to miss good prayer altogether.
 
My word of encouragement, then, is to not allow those hard times to pass without recognition of the deep and precious work God is doing in our lives. God is not absent at those times, but calling us deeper, closer, more assuredly into his loving arms.
 
Is the journey hard? Know that God not only hears your prayers at this time, but is close to all that call upon his name.
 
May the captivating love of God, the fellowship with the Spirit, and the awesome forgiveness and favor of Jesus Christ be with you all this day.
 
John

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                Lisa
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#1448 From: amy becker <pallnursing@...>
Date: Tue Jul 24, 2007 4:34 pm
Subject: Re: Hi All
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Thank you John..I know this to be very you.
 
Blessings,
Aim~

J Hum <jhum07@...> wrote:
Greetings Group,
God's peace and blessing be with you all.
 
As God has called me to a deeper place of prayer (please pray that I get there!), I recognize how prayer is based on life circumstances. Inevitably, we pray about those things around us, things that bother us, challenges we face, challenges family members face, etc. Then we tend to stretch out from there and pray for church, community, city, world, and so on.
 
As hard as this may sound, I've found that the deepest and most profound of my prayers have come out of those times when I was really struggling; times when I hurt the worst, felt the most frustrated, or fearful, or just plain lost on the way. In fact, in the "good times," it's almost easy to miss good prayer altogether.
 
My word of encouragement, then, is to not allow those hard times to pass without recognition of the deep and precious work God is doing in our lives. God is not absent at those times, but calling us deeper, closer, more assuredly into his loving arms.
 
Is the journey hard? Know that God not only hears your prayers at this time, but is close to all that call upon his name.
 
May the captivating love of God, the fellowship with the Spirit, and the awesome forgiveness and favor of Jesus Christ be with you all this day.
 
John

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#1447 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Tue Jul 24, 2007 1:38 pm
Subject: Hi All
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Greetings Group,
God's peace and blessing be with you all.
 
As God has called me to a deeper place of prayer (please pray that I get there!), I recognize how prayer is based on life circumstances. Inevitably, we pray about those things around us, things that bother us, challenges we face, challenges family members face, etc. Then we tend to stretch out from there and pray for church, community, city, world, and so on.
 
As hard as this may sound, I've found that the deepest and most profound of my prayers have come out of those times when I was really struggling; times when I hurt the worst, felt the most frustrated, or fearful, or just plain lost on the way. In fact, in the "good times," it's almost easy to miss good prayer altogether.
 
My word of encouragement, then, is to not allow those hard times to pass without recognition of the deep and precious work God is doing in our lives. God is not absent at those times, but calling us deeper, closer, more assuredly into his loving arms.
 
Is the journey hard? Know that God not only hears your prayers at this time, but is close to all that call upon his name.
 
May the captivating love of God, the fellowship with the Spirit, and the awesome forgiveness and favor of Jesus Christ be with you all this day.
 
John


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#1446 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Sun Jul 15, 2007 4:05 pm
Subject: Re: You Are A Portrait
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Sorry for the wrong word choice. To "hew" is to cut something down, while the word for color I was looking for is hue.
 
John
 

J Hum <jhum07@...> wrote:
Hi Group,
I went to an art show last night with my brother. A lady I work with was displaying her art and so we attended her studio's exhibit.
 
As I considered my sermon this week, I thought how God works through the Scriptures and in my mind to paint a picture each week of faith topics to build up and edify the church. Each week, I start the week with a blank canvas and set out to paint a picture that, hopefully, shows God in all his texture, color, detail, and awesomeness.
 
The true beauty in all that, really, is that we are God's canvass where he's painting his image and work on our person--our being!
 
Sometimes, like dark, shadowy art pieces, the story of grief is etched on our souls; unfortunately, it's part of the life process, one we can't avoid. Yet even through our grief, love wins out. The hews eventually start to lighten a bit and the dark imposing rain clouds of grief give way to a glimmer of sunlight in the distance.
 
What picture is God painting on your canvas this day?
 
John
 
 
 
 
 
 

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#1445 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Sun Jul 15, 2007 3:47 pm
Subject: You Are A Portrait
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Hi Group,
I went to an art show last night with my brother. A lady I work with was displaying her art and so we attended her studio's exhibit.
 
As I considered my sermon this week, I thought how God works through the Scriptures and in my mind to paint a picture each week of faith topics to build up and edify the church. Each week, I start the week with a blank canvas and set out to paint a picture that, hopefully, shows God in all his texture, color, detail, and awesomeness.
 
The true beauty in all that, really, is that we are God's canvass where he's painting his image and work on our person--our being!
 
Sometimes, like dark, shadowy art pieces, the story of grief is etched on our souls; unfortunately, it's part of the life process, one we can't avoid. Yet even through our grief, love wins out. The hews eventually start to lighten a bit and the dark imposing rain clouds of grief give way to a glimmer of sunlight in the distance.
 
What picture is God painting on your canvas this day?
 
John
 
 
 
 
 
 


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#1444 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Fri Jul 6, 2007 5:05 am
Subject: Re: Awful Night
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Hi Caroline,
Thanks for writing. I'm really sorry to hear about your intense loss. It sounds from the anger and sensitivity that you were really close, and that this loss has been devastating to you.
 
Intense grief and possessions (especially those of the person that died) are two things that don't mix well, but they're inevitably linked together. Depending on how people grieve is how they're going to react, and your anger is a manifestation of how much you're hurting.
 
Caroline, if you have the time and would like to, please tell us about your grandfather. What kind of man was he? How was your relationship with him, and was his death expected?
 
Your mom may have grieved before his death and now feels that it's time to "move on," while you're just starting your grief process and it feels overwhelming.
 
Caroline, many of the Psalmist would get very angry at people and circumstances, but they would eventually turn their difficult emotions to praise. Look at the first 7 verses of Psalms 5.
 
It might even be helpful when you get really mad to think, "what would grandpa say to me right now about this situation."
 
As for your grief, please feel free to share how you're feeling here. If angry, like you shared in this post, please let us know. We'll pray for you and support you through this challenging time.
 
If you would like some thoughts as to how you might better interact with your mother, please tell us more about your relationship with her and her relationship with her father-in-law.
 
Thanks again for introducing yourself, and, again, sorry for the loss of your grandfather.
 
John

caroline <cwf24@...> wrote:
I am a new member. My grandfather died on June 8, 2007. Tonight, I am
not in a good mood I am very angry at my mother and her friend Susan
because they were nosying around my granddads home and he has not
been gone even a month. It made me very angry. It was my first time
back into the house so of course I was hurting to begin with. (To
clear any confusion any readers may have this was my dad's dad who
died). My Grandmother is still in the house with 24/7 care due to
alzheimers. She no longer knows anyone which doubly hurts. It felt
like a million knives going through my heart when my mom and her
friend were walking and going through the house like nothing was
wrong. I told my mother I was leaving, she asked why I said I was
upset with her. She said why and I told her because she was going
through things. She said well we have to do it eventually. WELL
hello!!!! Mamoo(my grandmother) is still alive. Plus this really was
not her place to do it. Plus she knows I am hurting really bad and
missing my grandfather so much right now. I always will but right now
the pain is extremely fresh and bad. EXTREMELY BAD. She knew that was
my first time back in the house(which was very painful) did she have
to do what she was doing??? I am still angry with her.

Any support and opinions would be great.
Hugs,
Caroline



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#1443 From: "caroline" <cwf24@...>
Date: Thu Jul 5, 2007 7:56 am
Subject: Awful Night
cwf171980
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I am a new member. My grandfather died on June 8, 2007. Tonight, I am
not in a good mood I am very angry at my mother and her friend Susan
because they were nosying around my granddads home and he has not
been gone even a month. It made me very angry. It was my first time
back into the house so of course I was hurting to begin with. (To
clear any confusion any readers may have this was my dad's dad who
died). My Grandmother is still in the house with 24/7 care due to
alzheimers. She no longer knows anyone which doubly hurts. It felt
like a million knives going through my heart when my mom and her
friend were walking and going through the house like nothing was
wrong. I told my mother I was leaving, she asked why I said I was
upset with her. She said why and I told her because she was going
through things.  She said well we have to do it eventually. WELL
hello!!!! Mamoo(my grandmother) is still alive. Plus this really was
not her place to do it. Plus she knows I am hurting really bad and
missing my grandfather so much right now. I always will but right now
the pain is extremely fresh and bad. EXTREMELY BAD. She knew that was
my first time back in the house(which was very painful) did she have
to do what she was doing??? I am still angry with her.

Any support and opinions would be great.
Hugs,
Caroline

#1442 From: J Hum <jhum07@...>
Date: Tue Jul 3, 2007 4:55 am
Subject: Re: Re: searching for help
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Hi Linda,
Unfortunately, there are others. None of us are immune to the tragedy that strikes daily. It's heartbreaking, and no less than millions of "why???" questions rise before God each night with a flood of tears, but I really believe God intended us to support and stay with one another.
 
Again, I'm really sorry about that terrible accident that claimed the lives of two precious people and injured your daughter. I can imagine the "fear of letting go," is very strong. That will be my prayer for you and your family that God will give you the strength and peace you need to
 
None of us can say why that accident happened, and while, unfortunately, the lives of this young man and woman ended, ours continue. Please feel free to invite your daughter to our site; she doesn't have to post if she's not at that place, but, like many here, she might want to read and get some support from what others have to say. And like I said previous, the best thing we can do (even though we don't always see the immediate results) is to continue upholding her and you in prayer.
 
God be with you all through these challenging days, Linda.
 
John

Linda <mljmbaaa@...> wrote:
Thanks for all the replys so far. They help to let me know there
are others. The boy that was killed was her boyfriend of 2 years
and they were making plans for a future so that makes this that much
harder. I looked for a christian group as I believe that God can
help you through anything and I have chritian friends but sometimes
you need more. She has lived on her own and has been home here with
me and I know that next week she will be back to her own place and I
am having a hard time with that today esp for some reason. The fear
we all have of letting go is rearing its ugly head as I dont want
anything to happen to her as we already had such a close call. She
usually has a hard time in the morning and then we talk and get on
with the day. Thanks again to everyone that responded.--- In
Grief_Group@yahoogroups.com, J Hum <jhum07@...> wrote:
>
> Hi Linda,
> Thanks for writing; I'm really sorry about your daughter's
traumatic loss, the injuries she sustained in that horrible
accident, and your losses as well.
>
> Obviously, the auto accident sounded so bad, that I'm sure
you're thanking God this day that you still have your daughter.
These accidents happen every night on highways throughout our
country, but there's no way to prepare for when we get the call.
>
> You show such a wonderful love for your daughter by coming to a
group such as this and trying to find support for her. There has
already been some great wisdom shared concerning grief; it's going
to take time and patience to walk with your daughter through this
valley of darkness. From the difficulty of guilt ("why did I live
and they didn't?") to the loss of a future (I don't know how serious
your daughter was in her relationship with her boyfriend) to the
enormity of grief because of the death itself, she is going to need
time, space, and open acceptance as these deep inner wounds try to
heal.
>
> Our support and encouragement, here, is first in prayer. We pray
for each other at this place. Knowing how challenging life is
without situations like you all have been thrust into is hard
enough, but then this? It brings to mind John 11:35--the shortest
verse in the Bible. "Jesus wept."
>
> Secondly, our support is to be here and listen with the
compassionate heart God has given us. It's so important to be able
to have a place where we can share true feelings: hurt,
disappointment, anger, rage, despondency, depression, and just how
lost a situation like this can make a person feel, to also being a
place where we can start making the slow trek back to functional
life.
>
> Linda, this is your loss too. Your daughter was hurt, and you
had to have some kind of relationship with this boyfriend and friend
of your daughters.
>
> If you wouldn't mind, can you please tell us when this all
happened, maybe a bit about the two that died and how close your
daughter was to these two (and how well you knew them also)?
>
> I will say we are a faith-based grief group so nearly everyone
that shares here does so from that perspective. What that means is
that we talk about God's love, how prayer has helped us through, and
how praise and truly loving and forgiving one another is so
important in making it through situations like this--healthy.
>
> We're so glad you came here, and deeply sorry about this tragic
accident.
>
> Gracious God, we are so saddened to hear what has happened in
Linda's family, this horrible accident, the death of two precious
people, and the injury of her daughter. Lord God, I pray your love
and peace would bring comfort to that home where the wounds are so
deep at this time. May your healing presence be with each of them as
they try to make some sense of this horrible occurrence. Please be
with the families of the two that died and bring comfort to their
wounded hearts, and help Linda's daughter in her physical and
emotional recovery.
>
> Lord, situations like this don't catch you off guard, but they
sure do catch us that way. Make your presence evident during this
difficult time. Be with all the families, in your powerful name,
Jesus, we ask, Amen.
>
> Linda, feel free to write anytime.
>
> John
>
> Linda <mljmbaaa@...> wrote:
> My daughter (24yrs) was involved in an auto accident
that killed her
> boyfriend and another friend. I am seaching for things that might
> help her or things to say or give. This is something any parent
does
> not want to watch their children go through so I am just trying to
> someone thats been there or close and things that helped you. She
has
> been living on her own but has been back home recouperating but in
a
> few weeks will be back to her own place. Thanks for any responses.
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Got a little couch potato?
> Check out fun summer activities for kids.
>



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