"In the beginning of the recovery process one must remember not to
become complacent, one must always keep their guard up and keep those road blocks in place." So true! I had so many stumbling stops and starts. Each time I went back out to the casino though the darkness got even darker, if that's even possible - and it IS POSSIBLE! I wanted to die. The thought of being dead was like an opiate in and of itself. Like, "Ahhhh, I can just end it all and it will be over."
Time away from the casino stopped that way of thinking. (I had to stop as I was dead broke and still am). But I am inching my way to freedom, and it's like trying to slide my way along on an icy ledge towards an open window 60 stories up. Just don't look down. The warm room on the other side of that window is freedom - your life after CG. This all takes TIME! Unfortunately it takes no time to become a CG, but forever to maintain freedom from gambling.
Maintain Maintain Maintain! Notice how you are happy again. Notice that you are not lying as much. Notice that money is becoming money again. Notice all the positive things that are snapping back into place when you stay away from the f&^%ing casinos. We can do this, but we can't do it alone.
Stay Busy. Stay Away. Reach Out. Get Real.
Peace,
Sue
--- On Sun, 7/5/09, kitten4477 <kitten4477@...> wrote:
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